Having been a provider for 3 1/2 years now I have had plenty of opportunity to analyze this.

As providers, we strive to be more like someone you already know and are comfortable with, but still have to maintain a certain level of emotional disconnection because if we don't, it could get messy for you guys.

So my question to you is this, both to providers and hobbyists alike..... Do you believe it is possible to be truly intimate and romantic during a session without it becoming more emotionally involved than what we want?

If you are a strong willed person I think it is possible and can be a very good thing, so long as you dont let your emotions, even true feelings, get the upper hand.
I have some experience with this and it is just hard for both parties when they develop sincere affection for each other.
In my two situations where this has occured, I remain close to one and not the other woman(a touring provider) so it dosent have to be the the horror show some say but youre very perceptive to be wary and try to figure out how to handle this.
My advise is be upfront and try to communicate as clearly as possible so no one gets the wrong idea about what is truly happening.
If you can pull this off both of you will benenfit. Hope this is helpful Marie.

I do separate the sex session from a romantic relationship.  You really have to do that. I have been friends with a few of the providers, but have been careful not to stop over the line. If you both remember to do that, it will be fun times, with no drama.

Yes, I think it is if you have a clear and focused mind.
Knowing that 'it is what it is, and it's not what it's not' allows me to enjoy the time with my hobbyist friends.
I know my place in their world and they know their place in mine.
I don't allow a cross-over into my private life, other than conversations so that the lines are not blurred.

I think itimacy comes with time and romance comes with those that fancy that.
Intimacy is more to me than the physical.  Knowing the background of a person, about their home lives, day to day goings-on, favortie movie, favorite things, and sharing many experiences together creates a bond.
One hour together is not all that intimate to me, albeit loads of fun.  Multi-hour engagements and more than one visit with someone builds a foundation for a true frienship.

I adore my hobbyist friends and am glad to see them when they request it...though, I tend to think of it as if they are lovers who I visit with from time to time and Enjoy them to the fullest.  We don't grow bored of one another, irritated with the small stuff....the waiting helps build the anticipation...the distance keeps us in our respective places.

Women who get into providing in an effort to find a hubby or boyfriend are majorly confused and don't understand the intracacies of this business.

Men who hobby in an effort to find a wife or girlfriend are misguided and will end up hurt or angry.

If you are clear about what you are doing, then there is little room for confusion....and plenty of time for romance.

Merely my opinions...

Good topic!

My opinion will be skewed however.

You answered your own question with your inclusion of the word "truely".

For me to be intimate(in he-man understanding)all you have to do is 'show-up'.

Romance is a different story. Some men like to think that romance is a couple of pecks on the cheek and BAM!!!!!

Nothing can be farther from the truth. Romance(IMO)can be described as genuine interest in 'fulfilling' your partner emotionally. For purposes here, that's best not attempted.

My opinion is skewed because I now have a GF who spent a great amount of time and effort fulfilling both my intimate(fantasies)and romantic interests. And I reciprocated because it was the gentlemanly thing to do. She began as a provider and now swears it off. It just wasn't for her.

I have friends in this field who have done VERY WELL at achieving the 'illusion' of intimacy and romance. I knew,all too well,that it was ILLUSION however.

Hell, I even have relationships with girls that i've never met. I wouldn't give up those relationships to save MP's life. Just kidding MP!!

PLAY as an adult and your bound to find your own path. Whatever that may be. The key here is ADULT behavior. Now i've gone and thrown a wrench into the pie.

Want to be intimate?????? LOL

Intimacy and romance are two different things.  I think two people can connect to a point that they care about each other "in the moment", and that is a wonderful escape for both.  That's what the hobby is all about.  Romance is quite another thing, with implications beyond "the moment."

7-8 months ago i met a young provider who turned out to be a single mom.The first appt(incall) was great,so a few weeks later i called her again and invited her over to my place,she didn't have a car so i had to go pick her up and then drive her back to her place,the second appt was even better than the first one so we agreed to meet again,a week later i picked her up again and we went to my place,that night she asked me if i want her to stay the whole night for no additional charge,i just had to pay for her babysitter,i said ok and she stayed over the night,saw her 2 more times after that and every time she stayed the whole night.The last time we met the things got very weird,that night she told me that she can't afford to pay her rent anymore and asked me if she can move in with me until she finds a new place,i said no and told her that i'm in this hobby just for the fun and that i wasn't interested in relationship.Never heard from her again.She is in jail now.It's always been a pay for play for me and it'll stay that way.

Yeah, I know. Like you, I have relationships with ladies I haven't met. And some I have. I plan on seeing the ones I haven't, and repeating with the ones I have. Have relationships with, that is.

Actually, there's one here I see when I am able to and she makes it very hard for me to want to see anyone else. It's always exciting and amazing with her. Not just the sex, either.

I think you're right, in that if we play as adults, you'll find your own path. But whoever said I was an adult.

Let's just say, I think anything's possible.

I've seen too much shit in my life to think otherwise...

Yes, it's possible, but only so long as there is direct and clear communication.  And that can become quite delicate when you're talking about intimacy.

(I won't pick on you for also throwing in the word "romantic."  I know what you meant.)

I have two (going on three) long time regulars.  The two are opposite ends of the spectrum.  With one, we have it down to 30 min wham, bam encounters, and she typically texts me.  We are only about one thing.  She brought her GF once for some extra fun.

With the other, it's overnights.  I know a lot about her, what's going on in her life, her family, and have been with her when she's gotten bad news, held her while she cried, and hung out and had the opportunity to talk, a lot.  Yet, if I ever begin to wander across a boundary, she keeps me at arm's length...in a nice way.  She communicates, and so we're cool.  At the same time, our friendship, our familiarity, our warmth, and my fondness for her at least, I think enhances our time together.  

Obviously, there is danger and risk there for one or the other who starts thinking it is more than it is.  That just brings me back to where I started: communication.

(BTW, this assumes neither one has a personality disorder!  LOL!)

Having just watched my DVR of last Monday's Secret Diary, there's this quote...

"#1 unwritten rule of being an escort: You're only allowed one lover: money."

And yet, the episode belied that sentiment.  At least, for a week.

Of course, it's just TV.

That is so true

Well, I take that back, I have watched it if I am with someone else. But it's been many many moons since I have gone and turned on the TV just because Iw anted to watch something. Personal decision (I call it bubble bum for the brain lol)

Even within this hobby, I have learned that if you make money the priority, you will make mistakes in other areas that could jeopardize your safety.

All I can think of is her poor child

She'll be out soon,she's in jail for hit and run with her sister car.

no close personal relationship can exist without drama at some point. otherwise, there wouldn't be any providers...

Good point re making money the priority.

Thanks for posting a provocative question.

Yes, there is a price for everything...in more ways than one.

You are most welcome and thank you for participating.