I'm posting under an alias for reasons that will be obvious.
I used to be a regular, good client in the DC/Virginia area, always had good times, no problems.
One day, however I saw a K-girl who seemed to be independent but worked out of a complex where other agency girls did.
I won't go into exact details, but I would say the girl sort of 'flaked out" and was uncomfortable about something, and asked me to leave. I did so. And since we didn't get to the act I recovered my envelope.
Did not think anything of it, but since then none of the area agencies would respond to me, either by phone or email. I'm pretty sure I'm blacklisted and somehow the info got passed along the grapevine.  There just doesn't seem to be any way to tell my story and get out of the doghouse.
If anyone has ideas on this, please post or let me know.

& its difficult to respond to you without having the facts. There three sides to this story , your side , her side & what actually took place. Why did she ask you to leave? Not get to the "act"? What does that mean ? How far were you into the appointment before that happened ? Did you take back all the donation? What about the time she spent with you since you got there?  

For a variet of reasons guys legitimately walk away from appointments but they do it after calling booker. It does not result in black listing. K-doll bookers share intelligence & you may have been classified someone who left without paying or worse stole the donation & left . If you are characterized as such you may end up on a national black list with all your personal information online for everybody to see.

Feel free to pm me but its very difficult to advise on something if you don't have the facts.  

clients get blacklisted by one agency but not others.   even if a girl complains about you to her agency the agency might not let you see her but still let you see someone else.   even theft it has to be proven. an agency isn't going to just take one word from a kgirl when you are a regular.  and this is an indy?  that makes her power to ban you with the agencies more unlikley with just a claim of theft.  but you assault a girl and she shows wounds...now that is universal ban.

but whats strange is you claim to be a regular and no single response?  and you have no personal contact with any of the veteran girls?  thats weird.  im not suggesting you did something your not saying but if no response and no other contact then you just have to wait or maybe have a hobby friend speak on your behalf but then you would have to give this hobby friend some personal info which i suggest its totally not worth it

This is what occurred:

When I got to the apartment we went through the usual pleasantries and then into the shower (yes, she got naked) together.

In the shower she was soaping me and I was gently -- yes gently -- exploring. For some reason, she said to me, "Are you going to be gentle?" and I replied, "Of course." But a minute later, she said, "I don't think you're going to be gentle. I think you should go."

Given the fact that she was nothing like her pictures, that there was no chemistry (or bad chemistry) I said fine. Got dressed, went to the table and took my envelope back. I debated whether leave something for her time, but couldn't really think of how much. I felt she was being a flake and not delivering, and did not want to start a negotiation.

Maybe she deserved something, but certainly I think we could all agree that if she kept the entire donation it would be a flagrant ripoff. And it was a big inconvenience and long wasted drive for me.

If I posted my real handle, you would see I have had dozens of reviews and have been a TER member for many years. Have never once had any problem with a provider, have always shown respect. I considered posting a review -- which would have been essentially a non-review, with this info -- but decided to let things go and give her the benefit of the doubt.

She was not part of an agency, so no one to complain to. But I do suspect she had a 'handler' who was doing the texting for her. And my guess is that she was a B-lister -- letting someone handle her booking without being part of the group. This is because the complex is used by others in the K-scene.

I wouldn't say I was regular, but had seen several K-girls in the area over the past few years. I actually  forgot about the incident, but began to suspect something a few months later when I tried to make another appointment. I tried four agencies, at least two of which I had been approved before, but no response to either email or phone. So I do believe there is a community which shares this info, and the girl could have said anything.

I just recently discovered this board for some reason, and was hoping someone from the K-community could offer some advice.

Well i would be concerned about her asking you be gentle and then you continuing something that apparently she didn't consider to be gentle.

I'm not sure if language might be part of the situation so there could have been a misunderstanding and she felt you were not going to do what she asked.

I know one of the first agency girls I saw in the initial undress get a first BJ I put my hand no her head - no pressure (or I didn't think there was) and she pushed my hand away, saying "gentle please". I said okay and she continued. I felt awkward with my hands just on the arms of the chair and started to brush the side of her head and same reaction: "gentle please". I realized that it was probably not a case that I *was* being rough but that I was putting the girl in an uncomfortable, and potentially risky, position that she didn't want.

Fortunately I got the message and we had a great time!

As for the donation. Not sure what I would have done but now that I'm reading this I know should it ever happen to me I'll leave the payment and then talk with the booker to see about a resolution.

...but you have to understand that the default position of the K-boys on this board is to always give the benefit of the doubt to the K-girls.  On all other TER boards they'd be referred to as "manginas" and White Knights but since they comprise 95% of the posters on this board, they rule the roost.  The K-board is the Bizarro world of TER.

In your place I would have eased up when remarked "Are you going to be gentle?" , it's an equivalent to a no & I would have got the message & let her proceed. "gentle " to you is not "gentle" to her. Your exploring may have been too much too soon. 

Again , I would have called the Booker if I decided to leave & may have done so as soon as I determined she did not resemble the ad pictures if that was a problem for me. I can't help there may have been some frustration on your part thar manifested itself your approach and attitude. Leaving with the donation gave the provider the opportunity to tell her side of the story. Even bookers who do not cooperate on references share info on who they perceive as dangerous. You seem to have disappeared for months . For every action & reaction there are consequences .
 I suspect you may have been  described as rough/violent client who stiffed the provider , perhaps even robbed the provider since you took the donation after giving it to her. Bad case of misjudgment if you wanted to be in the good graces of the bookers. Would you have done this to a provider of a different ethnicity. 

What we need to comprehend is respect the boundaries set by the providers . No should mean no & give us cause to pause to think about what we might be doing that is making the provider uncomfortable. 

I see the backstabbing imposter K-expert is living up to his reputation as an 
outcast. Lest we forget who he is :

So is this really why you have been a pissy little bitch for all these years?  
Posted 1/10/2014 at 3:25:25 PM  
GaGambler  
http://www.theeroticreview.com/discussion_boards/viewmsg.asp?MessageID=221832&boardID=39&page=1#221832  
   

Well thanks for the input. Did not intend to get into a dispute with different parties on this board.

Just pointing out that there was no formal 'booker' as far as I can tell, someone was probably texting for her. But I can't really see anyone to complain to. This incident happened several months ago and the girl is no longer around (at least using that name). As for my conduct, I've been with a very large number, or many ethnicities, and I think I understand the boundaries.

I posted this for a couple of reasons -- so the hobbyists can be forewarned of these kinds of issues, maybe allow the K-community to see this and understand there can be a different point of view.

For the presise issues you are having to deal with. I did leave an envelope for a K-girl that was unable to perform as she wasn't feeling good. Best to keep things peaceful. I did text the booker of the situation though.

It's always best to walk away with a touch of class. The money is just not worth it.

If figure the old wisdom about gambling applies. Only gamble with what you can afford to lose. As good as research I do, neither me nor the other party can foresee all eventualities, so I'd prefer to give up what I'm prepared to lose, rather than take a chance of getting on someone's BL.

END OF MESSAGE

Not have posted  in this forum , which is a national / general board . In your predicament I would have posted in the regional board or perhaps directly contacted trusted/respected bro , told him of my situation  & asked him if he could contact a booker or two on my behalf. If bookers are not responding to you using an intermediately ,who can act as an honest broker,  may be the  best option you have.  

 
 

After reading the various comments, maybe she felt uncomfortable with whatever you may have been doing in the shower.  Maybe due to language/interpretation/communication, she did not voice exactly what you were doing. Regardless, the easiest thing would be to get a new "burner" phone (I hope you don't use your real phone number) and start from scratch with a different type of verification method, so they cannot link you to your old ID.  IMHO, it isn't dishonest... it's just another method of identifying yourself.