I have been away from this place for a long time, for that I apologize.

This is a difficult message to write, but, as I am "getting my affairs in order", it is one of the stops to be made.

As some of you know, but, most don't, because I chose not to talk about it, for the last 5 years, or so, I have been fighting pancreatic cancer.
4  years ago, after 6 months of chemically infused and induced hell,  I beat the beast and got a clean bill of health. I was clear for almost 2 years when it came back.
Since I had beaten it once, I knew I could beat it again and put all my effort into the fight. After 9 more months of chemically infused and induced hell, I was given a second clean bill of health, no bloodwork abnormalities, no spots on xrays and scans.
It has been a little over a year since that last clean bill of health.

This week I found out it has come back again.
This time it has come back very aggressive and very nasty.

I just don't have anything left in me to fight the beast again.
And it is becoming obvious that I can't beat it in the end.

So, with that all being said, I wanted to say goodbye to this awesome community.

To the gentlemen I have met, you are class acts and I am proud to have known you.

To the ladies I have met, made friends with, and/or spent intimate time with, you have been the thrills of my life.
You will all be missed greatly, and will be remembered with much fondness.

So,  a bit of advice from someone who has been through hell and back, several times, enjoy life, it's to short, and can end all to soon.

Those who have known me, please remember me fondly, and know that you made a great, positive, difference in my life.

Maybe someday,  I'll see you "somewhere over the rainbow".

My father died of this back in April 1999.  Worst day of my life, and I lost an ex on 9/11/01 when the WTC was destroyed in NYC.

Though we never met in this life, I saw many of your posts over the years, and through my dear friend Sexy Toni and others, I felt like I was part of this community even from over a thousand miles away from my home in NJ, at least in spirit.  Remember that old song by the Righteous Brothers about Rock and Roll Heaven.  See you there... first round is on me when I get there...

Bill

First, thank you for your service to our country during the vileness of Viet Nam, thank you for all the great parties you
arranged and the great times that were had by all and your service to our community and thank you for being a friend.
You're a PRINCE-Best Always and MUCH LOVE to you, Buddy, 1rob

But I understand what ur feeling.  I am going thru my own battle with cancer. As scary as it is. I refuse to lose the battle. It's my first fight tho. Yet I have watched over 1/2 my family battle it. Some won some lost.  But I have 2 keep in mind to keep going forwards. You just can't give up. U beat it twice. U need 2 dig deep n find the strength 2 stand up n say I will beat this!

I know your special place will be waiting as well. I'm glad you have spent time with those you care dearly for and they are cherishing this time as much as you. This is your time to make choices on departing and wish you comfort and serenity.  You will be missed and thought of often by your friends here. We have only shared a few hugs but just one more to wish you off on another great journey.

Kisses Haley

with the Big C. I know this was difficult to write.

Thank you for all you have done for us. Not only wearing the uniform in Vietnam but in more recent times in hosting fantastic parties helping the P4P community in the Tampa Bay area. I enjoyed being your "wing man" with hosting the parties and found you to be a true dear friend who cared about all providers and hobbyists in every way.

God Bless you!

You will  be in my heart forever Bob.

Much love darling,

Steph