Female Prayer:
Before I lay me down to sleep,
I pray for a man who's not a creep.
One who's handsome, smart and strong.
One who loves to listen long.
One who thinks before he speaks.
One who will call, not wait for weeks.

I pray he is gainfully employed.
When I spend his cash he won't be annoyed.
Pulls out my chair and opens my door.
Massages my back and begs to do more.
I pray this man will love me to no end,
and never attempt to hit on my friend.

And as I pray beside my bed,
I look at the clown you sent me instead.
Amen.


Male Prayer:
I pray for a deaf, mute, nymphomaniac with huge boobs who owns a
liquor store.
Amen.