A blonde guy gets home early from work and hears
strange noises coming  from the bedroom. He rushes
upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed,
sweating  and panting. "What's up?" he says.

"I'm having a heart attack," cries the woman. He
rushes downstairs to grab  the phone, but just as he's
dialing, his 4-year-old son comes up and says "Daddy!
Daddy! Uncle Ted's hiding in your closet and he's got
no clothes on!"

The guy slams the phone down and storms upstairs  into
the bedroom, past  his screaming wife, and rips open
the wardrobe door. Sure enough, there is his brother,
totally naked, cowering on the closet floor. "You
rotten bum,"says the husband, "my wife's having a
heart attack and you're running around naked scaring
the kids!"

OK Ashley,

I was gonna lay off the blonde jokes for a while (you know they've all been in good fun) but....there is one more.

A young blonde woman was having financial troubles so she decided the quickest way out was to kidnap a child for ransom.  She went to a local park, grabbed a little boy, took him behind a tree & wrote a note.  "I have kidnapped your child.  Leave $10,000 in a plain brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park tomorrow at 7AM."  She signed the note "The blonde."  She then pinned the note to the little boy's jacket & told him to go straight home & show it to his mother.

The next morning she returned to the park, checked behind the oak tree & found a brown paper bag containing $10,000.  Included with the cash was this note...."Here is your money.  I can't beliveve one blonde would do this to another!"

Sorry--but here's another.

Why do blondes only date guys whose cars have tilt steering wheels?  Obvious answer...because there's more head room.

What do blondes and turtles have in common?

Once they're on their backs, they're screwed.

A Blonde guy takes girl on a date.
Halfway through dinner, he says, "Will you marry me?"
She says, "I think you should know I'm a nymphomaniac."
He says, "I don't care if you steal, just don't cheat on me."