There once was a girl from Hoboken,
Who claimed that her hymen was broken,
From riding a bike,
Down a cobblestone pike,
But it really was broken from pokin'!

There was a young girl named Ann Heuser
Who swore that no man could surprise her.  
But Pabst took a chance,
Found a Schlitz in her pants,
And now she is sadder Budweiser

There was a young harlot from Peru
Who filled her vagina with glue.
She said with a grin,
"If they pay to get in,
They'll pay to get out of it, too."

There once was a girl named Lass  
Who refused any cock up her ass  
But when the money got tight  
She couldn't stand the fight  
And now she's a provider with class