The bartender says, "Hey buddy, can't you read that sign? It says no dogs allowed! Get that mutt out of here!"

The man replies, "No, I can't read the sign--I'm blind, and this is my Seeing Eye dog."

The bartender is embarrassed and gives the man a beer on the house. Later that day, the man tells his friend about it: "I told him I was blind, and I got a free beer!" The friend then takes his dog into the bar and sits down.

The bartender says, "The sign says no dogs allowed! You'll have to leave!" The friend says, "Sorry, I can't see the sign because I'm blind, and this is my Seeing Eye dog."

The bartender replies, "Since when do they give out Chihuahuas as Seeing Eye dogs?" The man says, "They gave me a Chihuahua?"

A Pirate walks into a bar

walks up to the bar to order a beer.

The bartender can't help but notice that the pirate has a steering wheel coming out of the top of his pants.

Bartender: Hey what's with the steering wheel?

Pirate: Ahrrrrrrr they're driving me nuts.

Re: A mushroom goes int a bar..

it was a fungal only bar...