A guy gets home late one night and his wife says, "Where the hell have you been?"


"I was out getting a tattoo." "A tattoo? What kind of tattoo did you get?"

"I got a hundred dollar bill on my penis."

"What the hell were you thinking? Why did you get a hundred dollar bill on your penis?"

"Well, number one, I like to watch my money grow...

"Number two, once in awhile, I like to play with my money...

"And lastly, instead of you going out shopping, you can stay right here at home and blow a hundred bucks
anytime you want!"