Chicago

You cereal killer!!!! (eom)
puretwist 1874 reads
posted


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I know this is an off topic subject, so you may want to take a pass on reading this, but I had a very strange experience at breakfast this morning, and I need to get this off my chest. I got into an argument with my Rice Krispies. I distinctly heard, "Snap, crackle, fuck you!" I'm not sure which one of them said it, but I heard it and I said "Well, you can all sit right there in the milk until I find out which one of you said it." Mass punishment. The idea is to turn them against one another. Then I realize, stupid me! That's what Rice Krispies do. Sit in the milk. That's their job. Delicate beige blisters of air, floating proudly in the milk. And you can't sink them. They refuse to sink. The Navy ought to use them in life preservers. That's where they're really needed. And do you know how Rice Krispies manage to float for such a long time? By clinging to one another, they buddy up. They gather in little groups of eight, ten, or twelve, it's always an even number. That's because the electromagnetic polarity of the Krispies attracts them to one another. It binds them into pairs, like sub-atomic particles. They form little colonies, and you can't sink them, not even with a spoon. They just come bobbing up over the sides of the spoon, laughing at you and reveling in their buoyancy. they are very hard to sink. That's what the fruit is for. Not for added taste, or nutrition, it's for sinking the Rice Krispies. Believe me, a good sized peach, hurled at the bowl full force from standing on a chair, can take down fifty or sixty of those buggers in one glorious splash. But I had no mercy this morning, I climbed to the upstairs balcony and dropped a watermelon on them. That'll teach them little bastards to sass me at breakfast.

Man where do come up up with these things?? You are funny as shit..

When I was a baby my mother dropped me on my head, and I landed in a bowl of Rice Krispies !! The good news was, I sank about eighty of em.

You must be related to Robin Williams!! lol

Why don't you join me for a bowl of Cheerios, we'll have some Kix.

You see the most delectable tasties: Honey, Muffin, Kandie Sweetbits, Sweet Bailey.

You m'dear can leave the spoon at home. Get out the jello, and let's get messy.

And having visited your site, one of those thoughts are, that you are an amazingly adventurous, and beautiful woman. I'd skip breakfast for you anytime!!

I am booked breakfast lunch and dinner this trip, but I will take you up on a future brunch with soft cooked eggs and firm English muffins.

Whipped cream is so boring and tres passe. Besides, a little horseradish cream on my sushi clit lotus flower might obscure the Iron Chef judges view. LOL.

Just Say No2115 reads

knock it off, you idiot! Are you sure that you're not Squidly?

Merlin.2001 reads

Are you sure your not Hardcase or The Evil Bitch?

You are so funny....thanks for the laugh :)

Loan guy1963 reads

I have never written a response...Man that had me laughing my fucking ass off. Good day to you and all.

Your sentiments are appreciated, and a good day to you also. And don't make it your last response, post more often, it's fun !!

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