For some its all about winning the game. If people can lie and cheat their way to the top, many of them will.

In some cases, it's justified. I totally suck at high math. The only reason I passed my algebra gen requirement classes in college is because I paid a friend of mine to do my homework for me. Fortunately that was 60% of our grade so I just barely passed the classes with a D, even though I totally died on the tests. I've never needed algebra a day in my life and wish I could have taken something actually useful, like consumer math or business accounting. If I hadn't cheated then 4 years of college and a lot of money would have been wasted.

So think of it this way: just because someone cheats and/or lies that doesn't necessarily mean there is a victim.

What a great question for a board devoted to meetings with non-so's, where even the registered names are phony and often people respond to posts with aliases from their registered name.

Just a thought, this may not be the best place to get a reliable answer.

Why do people feel the need to cheat and lie to each other.

Cellman, sounds like something is on your mind.  Possibly a bad experience, or are you talking about the subject in general terms?

.

Just in general terms

You can do better then that

The answers to that are as varied as the person and situation.  Are you talking about cheating/lying in a relationship?  At work?  To strangers?  A pathological cheater/liar has much different reasons then a compulsive cheater/liar.

You need to put your question into some context.  A general question about cheating/lying is way too broad to even begin to answer.

sorry, in a smarta$$ mood.

Predetermination of fate is unfounded and grants us the gift of "go with the flow".  I think it's pretty swell except for cheating and lying.  

Buuuutttt, not everyone in a hobbyist or provider's life knows what they do so it is necessary to cheat and lie.

I'm just saying...

XXX-Giselle

There are various reasons, and reasons within those reasons, if that makes sense. What I think, maybe they are unhappy in the relationship, but are too insecure to end it for fear of being alone. So they go out and meet someone that will fill the void, but knowing that it might not last, they figure that they still have someone in their life that they can "go home to". Sometime its easier to deal with the problems you already know, instead of getting a whole new set of problems. So they are willing to deal with an unhappy relationship and have an escape from time to time, than to end it for fear they could be alone.
Dont know if that helps or is the answer you are looking for, but thats my 2. Good luck in finding whatever it is you are looking for.

Since you are speaking in generalities, I will also.  For some it is a sense of entitlement.  There are people who feel entitled to whatever they want and believe the end justifies the means.  It does not matter who they manipulate or lie to or cheat, as long as they get what they want.


Just my opinion.

From the time you accidently broke your mother's lamp...owned up to it, then got the shit beat out of you for playing in the house and breaking the lamp(just sayin) you learn that telling the truth may not benefit you personally.  You tell someone that what they are wearing doesn't look good and their feelings get hurt, so you then weigh the benefit of telling the truth to a person. Finally, there is the persona...similar to dressing up for Halloween.  We become what we are not and if many people buy into that image, you then are stuck to keep your house of cards from falling.  Bottom line and I agree with the self help guru Tony Robbins on this....a person will do more in life to avoid pain than they will ever do in life to gain pleasure. People lose weight in most instances not because of health benefits, but because they reach a pain threshold of how they look.  You lie to a spouse because the pain of seeing them upset and possibly judging you is greater than telling the truth of the issue. Just my $1.63 which is now worth $.02 of yesteryear.

We lie to avoid conflict, disapproval, judgment and rejection.

Find a partner that embraces all of your decisions without these consequences, and you’ll have the perfect avenue for truth. Barring that, we all find reasons to cross the line at different times.

Is that general enough?

As far as cheating etc- each can only walk in their own shoes. Unless it directly affects myself or someone I am close to I try to remember the old proverb:

"judge not yest ye be judged"

Good response OPD!

Xoxo
VC