if done at all, comes after the service is rendered. If never heard of tipping beforehand.

Here's a tip: Don't see her ungrateful ass again. Tipping is not a requirement from most ladies, after all, $$$ - $$$$$ per hour is quite the tip. Should a lady perform well beyond expectations and you feel so inclined, do so and at whatever rate you decide. Having someone hold back or give service for less than is called a wife. Having someone that you paid an agreed upon rate and not get her full attention for the hour is akin to a ripoff. Vote with your wallet and not see her again. There are too many wonder and grateful providers than the one or two who think you owe them something extra because they opened the door.

-- Modified on 10/18/2010 10:12:29 AM

I had an uncomfortable situation occur, and was wondering this has happened to others. I paid a visit to a lady that I'd never met before. Upon entering, as per her requset, I placed the donation in an envelope on the counertop near the dooway. We hugged, made some small talk and then made our way to the bedroom. En route, she made a detour and grabbed the envelope. As we were making our way down the hallway, I heard her say quietly, but loud enough that I heard, "hmmm, no tip".

The session turned out good. I've read reviews that rated this lady as great. Of course, YMMV, but I left wondering if I had put the $50.00 in before the session, would things have been better than good? Should I have defended my actions after hearing her whisper that comment to herself?

Now, I always tip a lady. My approach is that of service at restaurant. I walk in expecting to tip 20%. If the service is exceptionally bad, I may reduce that percentage. If the service is very good, I will increase that amount.

Is tipping expected before the session even begins? Why would one tip before we've even said hello?

I imagine there will be some ladies with the politically correct "tipping is apprecited, not expected". But for some, apparently that's not always the case.

Any thoughts? Thanks

Asking for a tip before service is fairly tacky. Asking for a tip at all is tacky, I'll leave it if I want and that depends on a number of factors.

Vegas was the worst. I don't know if I would see another girl when I go out there again.

There are lots of variables here, but I rarely tip providers and I do not think my approach is that uncommon. If I have a wonderful time and expect to return, or if the lady and I go way over the agreed upon time, I will add more money as I leave. Otherwise, my view is that I have agreed upon a service and a rate, and I see no reason to exceed that. And my congenial companionship should be more than enough reward for anyone (joke!).

However, there are lots of exceptions. If I go through an agency, I may leave a little extra since the lady is effectively working for somebody else and not getting to keep all the cash; on the other hand, if she is an independent charging a high rate for her time, I am less likely to tip, if a little more likely to gift.

And, if the rate I am being charged seems way below what is fair for what I have received, I am also likely to top up the rate to what I think she deserves, though overpaying can create a whole different set of problems.

There are also situations where I am getting a special rate and I top up the donation to the normal rate, or close to it.

In any case, I would never add the tip before we start. That defies the logic of a tip as a reward for good service. I am amused by this provider's approach - stage whisper of "hmm, no tip." My first reaction was that it was unprofessional and bad form, but upon further reflection, I like it. I do not accept that she did not know you would hear, so most likely she has found that approach works to assure a tip at the end of the session.

Anyway, the short answer is, that I do not think you did anything wrong, and I doubt she would have treated you better had you left a tip to start. By leaving the tip at the beginning you run the risk of leaving too small a tip and then what? That could make things even worse.

Once I heard that I would have told her that you always tip but you do it at the end based on how much fun you have with the girl.

Of course everyone in any service industry appreciates a tip...but mumbling "hmmm no tip" beforehand is manipulative and mean spirited.

I feel that if a sex worker expects a certain amount of money, he/she should charge what he/she desires to receive.  Charging less and assuming a tip is ... well... just ewwww.  Offensive to the patron and oneself as a SW.

I agree with the others. Tipping should only be offered after the service is rendered.  Otherwise, what's the point? If a provider is expecting a set amount + tip, they should just raise their rate and be done with it.

I have been told by several providers that becoming a repeat customer is better than a tip, and becoming a regular is better yet. Having limited means, that is how I choose to say "thank you."

It can be said that what she seemed to murmur was indeed a tad unprofessional. Let's consider this perspective. Assumingly we all go through great lengths to search for and plan out the women we care to see. So there is certainly an effort on our part to make sure that the woman in question is at the minimum a good match for us and hopefully an excellent time will be had.

This woman puts in her share of effort as well, she screens us, checks us out in all the ways she normally checks out a guy and then once comfortable, she agrees to a date. She hopes we don't blow her off as we likewise do as well. And she is looking extra sexy in that little get up we asked her to wear.

Now, I'm just saying, in these politically tempered  times up there with Dart running around and looking for all the PR he can gather, I would be trying my best to pick one or two ladies to ride the tide with until things go back to normal. So with that thought in mind, you freshen up and pick up a bottle of her favorite wine and maybe some chocolates and proceed to the time and place of your meeting exactly on time and smelling good.

In the envelope, you leave a 150% of the agreed rate. She may or may not open it. It may or may not affect her performance. What it will affect is the next time you email her for a date I can almost promise you that she will magically be available at the same time you are, or very close to it. And if she did notice it before hand. I'm sure she will be extra grateful during your time together.

Now, if by some chance she is not what you expected and there isn't any chemistry there at all, did you waste that money? No, because I believe she will be a great reference for you in the future. And a good reference could possibly bring us to that next session with the woman we have the best time with.

Aside from the cold weather, you guys don't realize how good you have it up there. Here is to all the lustful thoughts any one man deserves, and thank you to the women of Chicago for making them unforgettable.

Funtimes61

Tips are nice and I always appreciate them as well as chocolate, food, and wine from out-of-towners and one-timers.

However... as great as that may sound, I enjoy my repeat clientele even more

Neeva~

I agree... Agency girls I will tip because there's that split going on.  But, if I'm paying an Independent $500, $600 or higher, all that money is going into their pocket, I believe that my tip is ALREADY included. (I know I'm going to hear about the cost but, at those rates their $120 room at the Hyatt is paid for 5 times over in the first date.)

That comment was rude. I can count on one hand the number of providers I've seen who checked the envelope before the session. When a provider does this, it's a stark reminder that this is a business transaction and implies she doesn't trust you. Commenting on the contents is a slap in the client's face and would lead me to believe she's going to hold back.

I think you handled this well by not saying anything. However, I would have said in a polite way, "I'm sorry, I didn't know I was supposed to tip beforehand" and let her take it from there. It would have been interesting to see how she reacted. Look at it this way - she made you feel like a shithead with that comment so I think slinging a bit back in her direction would have been acceptable. On the few occasions when a provider has counted the envelope in front of me, the session hasn't been as good as expected, probably because I was a bit taken back by the lack of trust. Of course, providers do get stiffed and I realize that so I try to overlook early counting but I'm not sure I could overlook a remark like that.

Write a review and make sure that comment is quoted.

That is not an example of a professional.  To receive anything more than the agreed upon donation is a bonus and should never be expected.  I bet she didn't think you heard her!

Kimy

Exactly.  As in every services business, repeat clients are much more valuable that one time junkets.  And not only valuable, but my guess would be more enjoyable to the provider.  If she doesn't know that yet, she won't last long IMHO.

A few other random thoughts FWIW:

1) On a first date, I always leave a small tip with the envelope.  10-20% depending on the hourly rate (I give more as a percentage to ladies who charge less on the first date).  I add the tip at the beginning because I feel like it is so incredibly tacky and uncomfortable to tip AFTER.   Also from a legal perspective I am paying for her time, not what I get  out of it and I am consistent on that practice; tipping after might be misconstrued as payment for specific acts performed.  Finally, most quality women appreciate a small tip even if its not what they hoped for and they will be more excited for your next visit should you click with her.  OTOH, a larger tip might be greatly appreciated but then she will always expect such a tip, and my hobby excursions would be substantially reduced... so better to be consistent IMHO.

2)  On the second date with someone who really blew me away (which is mostly the only kind of second date I do), I always see the lady for multiple hours; as many as I can spare and overnight if I can swing it.  I tip up to 20% which on a $3000 date is a good tip (IMHO; I am sure there are some who would add more).  This gives me a chance to really spend time with her to see if she is someone I will want to make a regular, lets her know that I am willing to take care of her and not just out for a quicky, and frankly is more fun for me as my required "rest" time has increased substantially with age  My experience has been pretty consistent that most intelligent, energetic, and sexy ladies who really enjoy the profession tend to prefer a longer appointment and will go all out when they know that you like the longer dates.  I don't know for sure for every lady out there, but I would expect most GFE ladies (who are only seeing 1-2 guys a day) would prefer an 8 hour appointment with a 20% tip versus a 1 hour appointment and a 50% tip.

3) For my ATF's, I usually add larger tips or "extras" (like dinners, gifts, etc.) because I would do the same for a mistress and that is how I think of my ATFs (I still badly miss my first ATFs who have moved on - Sophia/Sofia from Orlando and Madeline Moore who are both just fantastic women).  At this point, for me, its not a business transaction.  I pay because I want to make her happy so sometimes I leave a lot more than 20%, other times less.  As a funny example, I did an overnight in LA a few months back with my current ATF and we had not really discussed the amount for the overnight.  She had to fly in from SF, so I gave her a large extra tip (about 50%) over what I had previously given her for an all night since I figured she spent at least a few hours in travel plus taxi fares.  I left her in the hotel room sleeping as I had a morning meeting, and when I returned she had left me the 50% in an envelope with a note that the amount was "too much."  What is the point?  Treating a lady like a lady, with respect and genuine caring, is way more important to most GFE ladies than whether you leave 0, 5, 10, 15, or 50%.

You've earned my respect, sir.

Providers that get stiffed are probably bottom fishing for clients. What happens to you also has something to do with who you attract. Providers have to ask whether they are you sending the right message(s) about them and their service? If they are part of an agency or have assistants, what are those people doing/saying that would attract low-lifes? It takes all kinds in this world but trust is a double-edged sword. Many of the posters brought up repeat business as the best tip and I agree. There should be nothing more flattering to  a provider than a nice guy who pays and only wants what coming his way; nothing more or less. Gifts and tips should up to the hobbyist and not a damn toll for entry.

Sorry, can't justify tipping someone who makes $400+ an hour.  It's not like a waitress who depends on tips because they make minimum wage.