To the men out there...I caught my husband.  Costing him millions (about 3), two children and a career.  Best be prepared.

Those are the two options we have when the SO stops taking care of our needs.  Celibacy is not an option for 99% of us.

I'm married to a woman with severe mental illness.  We're sexless.  I'd leave her but she cannot take care of herself and there's no one else to take care of her.  I have a long time mistress who I love and she loves me, but she won't sleep with me while I'm still married.  I respect that.

That's why I'm a hobbyist, and yes, I'm cheating on two women.

There's lots of reasons why men make dates with escorts.  A good wife and a good marriage keeps men at home.

Clarity: the poster sounds like a bitter ex: she has no business posting here. I meant the loss of cash was probably worth the cost of his freedom..just like the hobby, not paying for the sex, paying em to leave, this payment to get the ex to leave was steep but worth it..

Actually, what I meant was beat your meat or cheat.  The two options available when you're cut-off at home but prefer to stay married.  The beat part doesn't cut it for long then you're only left with the cheat option.

hmmm...that's what i wondered about.  Funny thing is that he has hit rock bottom, can't sleep, begs to be at home.  All was good - in bed and out.  Quite honestly, most people always wondererd how/why he got the SO he did - better looking, smarter, etc.  So, it just seems so odd why a man would do that - boredom, fantasy, etc.  But in the end...is that worth it??  Maybe.

"A good wife and a good marriage keeps men at home."

Amen brother.  I don't understand what's so distasteful about having sex with your man.  My wife is disgusted with the idea.  It been over a year since I've had sex with her and only 4 times in the last three years.  Talk about a dry spell.  I do visit providers occasionally, but that gets hard on the budget.  I'd love to find a mistress.  Not easy.

Stuck you have a very good reason for looking for someone else and having another relationship.
The fact that your wife has been emotionally cruel to you I am surprised you let her stay out
of the state facility.Any other husband would have signed her away but you have compassion
and the patience of a saint .

He should have done them in front of you rather than behind your back

Thanks for saying that because it means a lot.  None of my friends understand why I haven't kicked her out, so I don't discuss it.  And then when I don't discuss it I wonder if I'm doing the right thing.  Really, Angela, thanks a lot.

Sometimes escorts ask me my story and they tell me that my situation isn't at all unique.  So back to my original point to the original poster - this happens all the time for a variety of reasons.

All I kept thinking about was running out to get some pussy

Moral(s) of the story:  
honor your commitments, i.e. be a real man,
if you aren't happy - man up,
keep your pants on = keep your children and career.  
And most importantly, a woman scorned can and will completely ruin your life : )

Men - think twice.

You married him in GOOD times or BAD. For BETTER or WORST. RICHER or POORER TILL DEATH DO YOU PART. You have alot to practice yourself you sound like a money mongering twisted selfish partner who has no compassion , who failed at trying to understand her husband , reacted in such a way to punish him and serve herself  to take the good fortune.Karma's gonna come bite you in the ass.So what he went out on you . But you did not FORGIVE him for his mistakes.I meet men who say they truly love their wives and then there is always this BUT she wont take care of me.

Marriage is a full time job . When something goes wrong you FIX it . Obviously he  loved you enough to marry you and surround you with substance. Could you ask yourself if what you will gain is anything that
you could have built all by yourself? All you say about yourself is what you can do . Ruin someones life.
Says alot about your womanhood .



     

-- Modified on 4/20/2012 10:31:11 AM

hey maagh,

if this is all true, why do you keep logging into the forums to keep a dialog going? do you think your story, if it's true, is going to change anything here? what is your goal here?

He wouldn't have stepped out on you unless you stopped banging him. Since you posted this on a hobby site, I presume you know he will see it. Now that he knows your plans, and understands the financial penalty you plan to burden him with, maybe you should pray that he doesn't look for ways to soften the financial blow to himself. You know, like perhaps having you shanghaied to some 3rd world country to enjoy the rest of your days dreaming of what might have been. Probably won't happen, but now that he won't be there to help protect you, you never know. Enjoy!  : )

Woman-think twice.

I guess we define womanhood in two very different ways...that is very obvious : )  

Enjoy your *ahem* lifestyle and I'll stick to mine...I think karma bit the man in the ass this time : )

already knows my plans...has been served and agreed to all...wants to protect his status in the community.  this was simply put out there to warn others...warning given

good night...out to the theater and dinner with friends...

almost forgot...seriously need to get out of here fast...so I'll make it quick...

Built it all honey : )  When someone breaks a commitment to me that was a vow you stated above then all bets are off...I take vows very seriously....but I also have self respect, something some "women" do not have as I've observed on here.  So, for my self respect, dignity of both myself and my family, I have done what most dignified, self respecting professionally legally working women do and protect myself, my children and my health.

Enjoy your evening...

Turn about's fair play I say submit a review on her so he can show his side of the story too haha!

I didn't think you were as stupid as it turned out.

You got a QDRO so your half (wasn't really half...but your idiot attorney's didn't know better) is taxable to you...dummy!

And had you not used your brother's real estate lawyers you would have found that your ex's business was worth 55 million....jackass!!

And he never liked those two brats from your first marriage either...so thank God they're gone too!

And now my pal has his life back so he can play with the gals here that are thrilled to see him regularly.

And his career is doing great, now that you're just a distant memory.  I still can't believe how cheap he got off from a gold digging bitch like you!

So good advice...my pal was "well prepared"...and YOU weren't!

Yep. Think twice. Don't marry it can ruin your life. I mean seriously whats in it for us?

From a strictly Darwinian perspective, male promiscuity is perfectly understandable, espically if your wife won't have sex with you. She then becomes a resource drain and barrier to the guys genes replicating themselves (the real purpose of our cells and bodies).

Since you don't discuss how and what he was "caught" doing, then on this board, I am assuming he was seeing providers. You may have his kids and his money, but you come here as a scorned woman. Looking for sympathy? You won't get much here. I would also strongly suggest that if he was seeing escorts, then your sex life was either lacking or perhaps enhanced by his play. You can paint whatever picture in your mind of whether he was good, bad, or that you really wanted to change the channel. The truth is, he didn't feel good about what was at home and that takes two. If he is basically a good guy, take him back and if can't re-commit to the marriage, move on. Coming here as some post victory celebration of dance is not only crass, it's childish.

And before I let you go, your sad assumption that your health was compromised because he was seeing providers is an even sadder part of your scorn. Providers use protection and those that don't, are usually outted by the community. I am betting that long before he saw escorts, you were doing it with him in the raw. Did you wonder then who else might he seeing or was your mind on making sure you pace with your payday? You see, being a hypocrite also carries karma. Don't think for a minute that you come out of this better than or somehow superior. You won't, you don't.

Don't call me honey ...you should be kissing our asses for being clean protected women in a community where your husband came. When he came home and kissed your mouth it was most likely buried in
one of the providers vagina that day LOL! That tells you how clean we are .

He could have been a really really bad husband and picked up a street walker.A vow is about as valuable as a baptism certificate. You drove him into the arms of other women who appreciate his support. But oh
wait . We have you to thank too because you  um... built it all . So we should send you a special thank you for turning a wonderful man over to the community for future luvin .

Well I said my mouthful . Enjoy yours too

 

-- Modified on 4/20/2012 3:42:14 PM

Man do I really appreciate the proper usage of an animated gif. Kudos, pablorod.

My wife's mental illness has made our marriage sexless and with very little affection.  I went celibate for around 5 years before venturing into this hobby. I have found "friends" that have helped me deal with this situation and I credit one lady for keeping me sane during the worst part.  Yes P4P is what it is, is cheating always cheating or at some point it may become survival.  One adult daughter has told me many time "dad you have to find someway to have some happiness, someone to share your life with".  She is telling me it would be Ok if I left her mom.

We all have our own reasons, but one fact is constant.  A married couple is two people, both are responsible for everything involving their marriage.

I feel sorry for the next guy that hooks up with this one.......

Ben Franklin said it best: Where there is marriage without love [which back then meant both the emotion and what we would call sex] then there will be love without marriage.

I knew someone in a similar situation. He said, quite rightly, that he would have been better off putting a bullet through her head and doing prison time than going through the divorce.

...a website w/some of your pix on it too, lol....
after the divorce is finalized of course if it hasn't already.

Please tell.  How did you catch him. Did he give you an STD

the old story where a guy meets his ole school chum and the dude is crying, so he asks him "why are you crying?" So he says "its my 25th wedding anniversary!" "So why are you crying" his friend asks. His response is "25 years ago, right after we married I realized she was a cold hearted cunt not interested in sex, or in me but only after my wealth. I asked my lawyer then, how much time would I have to do if I put a bullet through her head and he told me 25 years! Today I could have been a free man and rid of her!!!" LOL