I don’t know WHY I didn’t figure this out sooner!  It's the shampoo I use in the shower!  Check the label on your shampoo bottle.

When I wash my hair, the shampoo runs down my whole body and (duh!) printed very clearly on the shampoo label is this warning:
                    FOR EXTRA VOLUME AND BODY!

No wonder I have been gaining weight.  Well! I have gotten rid of that shampoo and I am going to start using Dawn dish soap instead. Their label reads:
                    DISSOLVES FAT THAT IS OTHERWISE DIFFICULT TO REMOVE.

Problem Solved. If I don't answer the phone, leave a message.  I'll be in the shower.

It makes short work after a slippery naked twister game - AKA The Mazola Rolla

The lack of menu choices that are offered to you....

So here is a different outlook on your menu
Burning Calories with Sex might be a better Option.

Kissing   burnes 120-325 Calories
Undressing burnes 18 Calories if unclasping a bra witrbation h one hand
Masturbation burnes 100-150 Calories
Intercourse                burnes 7500 Calories if done 3X week
Orgasm burnes 60-100 Calories

So Let's think about what we can do to make to DISSOLVE THE FAT.
Kisses
JC