This is likely not the place to ask for advice on the subject, but here goes.
A guy and his wife moved in next door to me at my townhouse in February, and immediately began leaving Christian literature in my mailbox, under my door, on my porch etc. They even hounded me when I took out the trash or shoveled snow. They pounced on me, admonishing me to be prepared for the apocalypse and repent and start going to church and blah blah, ad infinitum..that's all they ever said to me!!!
I told them I was an atheist, which I am, and I thought that would repel their badgering, but they persisted. I finally had to threaten them with a restraining order, which I'm not even sure I can do.

I just think that people like these religious lunatics need to respect my personal philosophical choices as I respect theirs. I never espoused my viewpoints onto them.

Since I mentioned the restraining order, their conversations with me have been more sane and civil.

(As an aside, just as I don't think a lesbian or homosexual would ever be elected president, a non-believer would be equally scourned; and you think O'bama has his critics!)

Inform them that if they even look at you, you will contact the postal inspectors as you have the original pieces of material that they had put in your mail box. All items placed in a mail box MUST have postage on them.. tell the people that you have the original material safely sealed in an envelope to preserve their fingerprints... I had problem with Jehovah's Witnesses constantly ringing my doorbells in the morning... I worked midnights and I was just falling into a great sleep when BUZZ... when they wouldn't take know for an answer, I resorted to answering the door totally nude, rubbing my head and scratching my balls...  It apparently freaked them out as they have not been back..

This is completely counterproductive to the topic at hand.  WTF... Find another forum that is cohesive to your problematic issue.

Not trying to be a bitch-just saying...

XXX-Gisell;e

I actually have a Cease and Desist letter that you can send them.  It is a Cease and Desist letter that was used with the Opus Dei religious zealots.

I'm not sure how enforceable it is ~ but hey, it will serve to scare them a bit.

Email me and I will be happy to send it to you.

Kisses,

Kelly

Tell them they're just in time, you're about to sacrifice a goat.

Seriously, hit them up for a loan. Use it for time with one of the many fine and lovely ladies on this board. And then tell them that you won't be able to repay the loan, it's just part of the Christian charity that is their duty.

Then ask them for another loan.

You'd have to prove intent to harm to get a restraining order and the first step would be taking them to court. You should write a letter to HOA if you have one. You could also send notes to all your neighbors about them and you may quell their zeal by embarrassing them.  You only other remedy may be civil court.

How about an Irish whiskey?  

Then agree that they are correct that everyone needs to repent before judgement day.  Tell them your church offers snake handling for "the pure" and you want them to go with you as new initiates.

I suspect they will decline.  

Maybe appearing as a bigger zealot will scare them away.

Btw this is all tongue-in-cheek!

I just read about the Southern Baptists sending "church starters" to save we heathen in the north. (Don't know if they will be bringing fire ants and kudzu.)  But I had no idea they were organized enough to have precinct captains.

Anon

if a gay atheist was president. I'd like to think this could be possible in my lifetime, but I doubt it.

As for the evangelists, I would try cursing a lot, they seem to have a real problem with that.

I could crawl down to your level and post a like-minded nasty reply, but it doesn't deserve any  more attention than it's already getting.

"Counterproductive"? What, exactly, are we/you/they producing, other than insignificant and trivial banter?

There are many other posts here that have nothing whatever to do with the "hobby", or sex, or dirty jokes, or in calls, or any other supposed "productive" chatter. I at least admitted that this post wasn't appropriate for this forum, and I was wrong to post it, but what is done cannot be undone.

Sorry if I took a precious moment from your royal existence to MAKE you read and respond to my childish question.

Agree w/ Tullamoredew.  

I posted a response that stated as such as well,  but Mr. Mod said it was "negative, trouble making, rude, and/or slanderous" and wasn't allowed to be posted.  It was far less "trouble making" than the original post I was was replying to was, but that one had no problem getting posted.  Doh!  Go figure.  

Anywhoo....off topic posts now and then can lighten the mood....no harm no foul.

Many regretful tears.  I hope you would never have to crawl down to my level as it would be quite the journey...

Thank you for helping me realize my lack of stature and importance.  It's just who I am...

Jessica Andrews has a ditty called Who I Am if you feel that it might pertain to our current offset in likeability.

I wish you the best and do feel horrible about my backsmack talk.  Again, Jessica Andrews-Who I Am.

XXX-Giselle