I am taking my wife to the Grove Park Inn in December. I would like to plan a great weekend. Can anyone recommend things to do and places to eat. Maybe a microbrew for lunch or something.

Also looking for a lady to join us one evening, paying special attention to my wife while I watch.

You lucky thing!  Having a playmate for a WIFE---friends AND lovers ain't nothing better;P
I have 3 suggestions, however, I am gonna have to look up two to get the names right.
Crowne Plaza Hotel had excellent food and service when I saw Gabby from Ashalee's there;P
Very upscale.  Let me get on the other two, back at you)

Here you go----course these were my fav during the months that I spent there earlier this year)
Sunny Point Cafe 626 Haywood Rd.
Black Mtn Bistro 203 East State St, Black Mtn
Look em up on Restaurants in Asheville Google)  Enjoy, bird

I totally overlooked that second part of your post(  Sorry! Dessert is an important part of your meal;P
Look on Woof Woof board for reviews I have done on Lilly, Molly, Salina, I THINK all would be happy to help out)  Call Bridgette during the day hours)

Red Stag in The Grand Bohemian across from Biltmore is a good choice; dark & intimate. Tupelo Honey is a fun choice. Doc Chey's Noodle House is EXCELENT & an ATF !!! Enjoy !!!

I like Vincenzo's.  They have a upstairs more formal dining room but I prefer downstairs where there is live music every night.  Never had a bad meal - most foods are Italian related but has other types of dishes.  Oyster Rockefellers (they call them something else) are excellent.