I just saw an add that got me thinking.  I see many descriptions which include "turn ons and turn offs."  This person had "too much body hair" listed as a turn off.  As I am fair haired Irish, this isn't my issue.  Neverthless, say for argument that I were hairsuit.  Should I take her "turn off" list as an invitation to stay home? It is kind of a mood killer that one would needs to cross his/her fingers in hopes that they don't exceed the body hair quota.  Plus, people who list turn offs make me nervous because I think that they are most likely picky in general.  I know that everyone has the right to see or not see who they choose.  Neverthless, these lists are a mood killer.  It makes the appointment seem like a job interview.  Job interviews aren't any fun.

A

Just like there are men who are picky in who they see. Why can't She? When choosing a woman you want to make sure for a correct fit. Why can't she? When choosing a woman you either would want bush or shaved. Well, why can't she? Would you pick a woman who had exccess body hair? If your answer is yes then more power to you ! If your answer is "no" then why can't she turned down a man with excess body hair? Isn't life about choices, how those choices we make fit our "safety zone"? Just like a man picks a woman who fits within his "safety zone", so do us providers. I know for myself, I would want to make sure that I will be there for you, through out our session, and not wishing it to end any sooner. Good example here: Last week I had a guy who had the worst, yellow-stained teeth, with some rot to the one of the front tooth. About 10 minutes into the appt. I knew that I couldn't go through with it, and actually told him to keep his money, explained my reasons why, and he left. I know that I made the right decision, for I could not imagine spending the next minute or so kissing into a not so clean mouth. So, I refuse to kiss a mouth with rotten teeth, does that make me a bad person? Although excess hair and rotten teeth are 2 different subjects, but yet alluding to the same subject: being turn offs.  I could see where it would be a turn off to a provider if excess hair was non-stop all over the body, and knowing myself there is nothing worse than going down on a man with his hair stuck to your teeth (especially with men who have hairy balls=please take note! lol)  I am sorry that you feel that it's like a job interview, but in reality, people are judged by their appearances, whether we like it or not (even at job interviews lol)




-- Modified on 2/21/2004 11:00:47 PM

> Neverthless, say for argument that I were hairsuit.

Through the modern miracle of technology, we have available to us waxing, electric trimmers, personal shavers, epil stop, electrolysis, and even an old fashion pair of scissors.

Presuming this was an issue for you (you state it isn't but for the sake of argument): You don't have to shave yourself totally clean, but if you have a hairy back why not wax it?  If you have an overly hairy chest, use a #2 clipper.  Pluck your unibrow.  Trim your nose and ear hair.  Clean up your personal area so it's not a total forest.  This is the sort of stuff a guy should be doing regularly for women in general, not just providers.  That is, for any guy who would like repeat customers of his own.

> It is kind of a mood killer that one would needs to
> cross his/her fingers in hopes that they don't exceed
> the body hair quota.

You can rest assured that all women, not just providers, have preferences that they're not exactly going to advertise.  The best you can do is to take care of yourself and make yourself at least reasonably presentable.  Most women, especially single women, spend a heck of a lot of time getting themselves ready to go out into the world because they know and are aware that men habitually judge them based on their looks, dress, and presentability before ever knowing their personality.  That is their reality.  It shouldn't be so surprising, then, to hear they have physical preferences if their own.  So if they take the time to advertise their preferences, whether they be ladies in this business or otherwise, in some form of communication to you, take it as a helpful hint as to what will help you increase her physical attraction to you.

-- Modified on 2/21/2004 10:49:18 PM

Um, I stated that "I know that everyone has the right to see or not see who they choose."  Never called anyone a bad person.  Everyone includes both women and men.  I was addressing a SEPARATE issue from "rights."  I in no way meant to imply that a women does not have a right to see whomever she want to see or that a women is a bad person for declining to see someone.  I was just trying to say that it is stressful feel like you're at an audition.  It is too bad, separate issue, that a fun hobby has to be stressful.  Peace.    

Presentable is a good word.  All I was trying to get at was that the, perhaps unfounded, concern is that presentable won't be enough.  Heck, maybe I am the only one that gets stressed about rejection.

people are judged by their appearances, whether we like it or not (even at job interviews lol) Hey, I know that there are some beautiful women who LOVE hairy men! Smile! )))))))))))))))))) They are out there! Do an iso: Hairy man seeks woman who loves them hairy or something to that effect. I hope your luck changes

> I was just trying to say that it is stressful feel
> like you're at an audition.  It is too bad, separate
> issue, that a fun hobby has to be stressful.

I think you're projecting the notion that because it might be stressful to you for a lady to have such preference lists, somehow other people would be stressed in the same way.

As for myself, I find such "turn on" and "turn off" lists more humorous than anything as I can barely imagine a girl needing to tell most men who may be interested in seeing her that things like generosity (duh) and good hygiene are preferred while things like rudeness and pushiness are turn-offs.  Humorous because she probably wouldn’t advertise such preferences if she didn’t run into at least a few men with such issues.

We are also lucky as men that as long as we're presentable, women mostly judge us by our character and social ability.

Just to clarify.  As a blonde/auburn hair Irish kid, I would not put myself in the hairy category, not even close.  I was just using that particular turn off as an example in an effort to amplify what I was trying to get across.  As to luck, I have not to date failed the audition.  Anyway, I understand that people are judge on many levels. I am just saying that it does add stress to what is a hobby.  Take care.

The "are other people stressed in the same way" is what I was wondering.  Am I the only one that gets a little on the stressed side about the list thing?  Perhaps it is just my Catholic background.

A

It has been interesting typing on this issue.  Thanks for the input.