BDSM

This raises so may issues --> BDSM contracts
LeChiffre 3 Reviews 11428 reads
posted

Maybe this should be its own thread, but I thought it was worth noting that most BDSM Contracts would not be legally admissible, although, as the Borscht Belt comedians might say, "It couldn't hoit!"

Link below to a mini-thread discussing this issue, for those interested.

JimMack13674 reads

Sam Mazzola, 49, was found dead in his Columbia Station home on Sunday, face down on a water bed. He was bound to the bed with handcuffs, chains and padlocks, Lorain County Chief Deputy Coroner Dr. Frank Miller told the Cleveland Plain Dealer.

Mazzola had a sex toy in his throat, which apparently obstructed his breathing, Miller said. He was also wearing a leather mask with the eyes and mouth zipped shut and a two-piece metal sphere covering his head, the coroner told The Morning Journal.

It implies that BDSM is the murderer.  BDSM is not at fault.

Know one can tell what happened to Sam that he was in this circumstance and died, not by the facts in this story.  i get why he suffocated.

You have to know your partners that you play with, you have to know where to set your limits given how well you know your partner.

May Sam Mazzola Rest in Peace.

I heard that Police said its one of the worst cases of suicide that they had ever seen in the little podunk town.

The guy also had a wild animal farm, were he actual had lions and such.  Unfortunalty last year one of his helpers was mauled to death.
The state of Ohio changed the laws regarding harboring Exotic Pets based on the poor demise of a young man.  Sad tale and was very popular in the news in this area last fall.

This is the kind of tragedy that SM 101 author Jay Wiseman (whose "day job" job was as a paramedic) will track and discuss in our community.  Easily preventable.   In this case, what you'll see from the article is that Mazzola asked a teen to help tie him up in anticipation of his lover arriving later, to find him in this predicament.  But the teen left, and Mazzola choked to death on the item in his mouth.

This is why dominant never, never, NEVER leaves the room if their submissive is tied up and completely helpless (and could choke on a toy, their own vomit, or have a seizure, etc.), and submissive should never do this kind of bondage on their own.  Make no mistake, this was "edge play", and Mazzola paid with his life by choosing his helper poorly.

1. Cover yourself:  I have many many friends (now retired) who decades ago were professional dommes.  The younger ones never covered themselves with proof of consent.  I think it is important for professionals, but for the rest of us as well to have a written consent to protect the top.  I know it sounds unromantic but it important.  I had a friend and submissive with whom I often played.  We knew each other well and I knew her likes and needs and am by nature (and profession) very careful when playing.  I also have definite limits of things I will not do with a sub.  During one exciting session as she was having one of her very explosive climaxes, she had a heart attack.  This became clear as she was coming down and everything stopped and an ambulance was called; but imagine if she had experienced sudden death while restrained...how would I have explained this?  Would I have been charged?  After that I always exchanged consent notes with submissives before I played and I encouraged my pro domme friends to do the same.
2. Be very safe:  The lists are long and available. But one example: I note Mr. Mazzola had his airway obstructed.  When indicated, i am happy to use gags, but always with an assured airways (either open gags or gags with large holes in them allowing mouth breathing through the gag).  One needs to be aware of any  health issues.  (My friend the sub had had no cardiac history, but did have controlled high blood pressure).  She was young to have a heart attack (late thirties) so I am not sure I could have anticipated.  We  played a few time after.  

It is simply wrong to assume play is without possible danger (as , of course, with skiing or bicycling.)

Maybe this should be its own thread, but I thought it was worth noting that most BDSM Contracts would not be legally admissible, although, as the Borscht Belt comedians might say, "It couldn't hoit!"

Link below to a mini-thread discussing this issue, for those interested.

Of course those are not legal, but a consent to be restrained etc reveals that the top has not forced the bottom to do anything against his/her will.  In the case of death, this takes the event out of murder etc and places it in the realm of what it is: an accident.  The contracts that are unenforceable are those that commit one to be the slave of the other for life.

I have always felt those waterbeds were an accident waiting to happen.

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