I fear some jump into it having only seen 50 Shades of Gray.
I am not a real big fan of BDSM, but some gals I've seen as GFE revealed to me that they also do BSDM as doms, and so being curious, I engaged with them in it and found some things I liked. I also met a gal who liked to receive abuse in the form of slapping her across the face while we had sex. This brought her to orgasm, but left me feeling kind of weird. She kept insisting that I slap her harder and harder to the point where it left noticeable marks.
As for pain, start off on the low end and build up to where they tell you enough. I had gals do this with lashes and riding crops on my back, and found it quite enjoyable. Tease and denial is also a lot of fun. Of course, not BSDM session (at least for me) would be complete without her ordering me to pleasure her in specific ways that get her off. I also tried out being bound with fur lined cuffs and blindfolded, but that didn't do much for me. One gal had me bind her legs and arms to the posts of a four-post bed frame using nylon stockings, then cut her clothes off with a knife as foreplay. I liked how it got her excited, but again weirded me out.
This is, admittedly, "vanilla" BDSM. The hard core gets into all kinds of iffy situations involving whips, chains, being bound and even playing with asphyxiation. You'd do well to hold off on this kind of thing until you get a PhD from some highly skilled practitioner.
Best of luck to you in getting into this exciting field.
