In past years, I've always sought out a regular. Someone who I can see on a regular basis and really get to know and learn.
And by know and learn, I don't mean get all in their personal lives or business. I like to learn a woman's likes and dislikes; learn their body and hopefully how to pleasure them.

I've found that these types of relationships can be very rewarding in that you can really achieve a level of intimacy and passion that you usually cannot get from seeing a variety of ladies on a regular basis.

In the past, I've met some really wonderful ladies who I have seen exclusively for almost a year or at least until they retired or moved away.  
I'm currently searching for another wonderful lady who I can see exclusively on a regular basis.  

Am I the only one who is into or fulfilled by just finding one special lady and seeing only her on a regular basis?
I know that a big draw to this hobby is the variety but are there any other guys who share this sentiment?

Ladies, do you like having a regular gent who sees you a couple to a few times a month or do you find this monotonous or unappealing?

Just my 2 cents, why would you want to spend that much time with a provider? Seems like you catching feelings dude. You been in the game long enough to know the rules. Take the feelings out Man. I personally prefer seeing different ladies makes the interest last longer for me. Dude, you acting like she is really your girlfriend or something.Hell, I would think other than the gifts you give a provider, spending that much time with her can get old and boring. Never loose sight of the game we playing in.

END OF MESSAGE

I respect your perspective but we are obviously two very different people who see this "game" as you put it very differently.
I realize that the majority of men get into this hobby to see a variety of different ladies and discreetly get their dick wet.

I too love variety but at the same time, I really enjoy building a strong professional and intimate relationship with a provider more. I don't want to take the feelings out as you suggested. For that hour or two I spend with that lady, I want to be able to lose myself in that person and in order to do so, those feelings of passion and intimacy have to be present.

Like with most relationships, things do eventually die down but when you're able to connect with a woman on that intimate level, there truly is nothing like it.

Happy hobbying friend and thanks for the feedback!

There are definite benefits to developing a regular relationship with one person such as: getting to know each other's kinks, having a deeper emotional connection, sharing special events together, and enjoying long story arc role plays.  But there can be drawbacks as well - such as: it's easy to start crossing personal boundaries, jealousy can enter into the picture, what happens when she retires or goes on long holiday leaving you out in the cold?

I've done a bit of everything in my hobby career over the years from trying to bang every girl in town (heh) to maximize variety and the thrill of the chase to working on one relationship almost exclusively to maximize emotional bonds with a very special person.  It's all good - don't let anyone else tell you how you should hobby.  It's your time and money - spend it the way you enjoy the most.

What works for me is developing a close, regular relationship with a couple of ladies.  I find this maximizes advantages while minimizing disadvantages.  Let me explain.

Having a couple of favorite ladies allows you to partake of the advantages of being a "regular" without too much risk of emotional/romantic attachment with one person.  It also gives you some variety by not seeing the same woman every time.  Who doesn't like a little variety now and then?  And if one of your favorites goes to the Bahamas for two weeks, you still have your other to keep you company while she's away.  And if - God forbid - one of your favorites retires, you can audition a new replacement fairly easily.  Which is a fun process in itself.

Not to mention most ladies require two referrals anyway to see a new client.  So why not have a couple of favorites?  It actually solves a bunch of problems.

And keep this as a secret between us gents - but sometimes a teeny, itsy bitsy, weensy competitive rivalry between two favorites can keep them at the very top of their game.  At least where you are concerned.  But don't let the ladies catch on - they will likely call us cads.  Or even man-whores.  LOL.

So now you know the secret to having your cake and eating it too.  You're welcome.

Mmmm, cake...

No that makes  lot of sense.  Do keep in mind the nature of the relationship. That is usually why I stick to 2 or 3 regulars and not just one.  It can be easy to jump the track and forget that it is about the envelope.  

Having sex with a woman where you know her and she you makes for a great time.

It been couple years and back .. Yes I have one regular just made me sq.. )

but the way I know I have truly connected with a woman I have met through pay for play is when she tells me "I don't want to take your money anymore" THAT is when you have truly connected, anything short of that is an act. If it's a convincing act, I can see where a lot of guys would like that feeling, but it's still an act if you're paying.

Personally, I mix things up, I see a lot of different women, and there are some that I have seen for quite some time, but exclusivity is a foreign concept where it comes to P4P and me, I do this mainly so I don't have to be exclusive to one woman. If I only wanted one woman in my life I'd get a GF or a wife.

I still get urges to see others but the connection we have is so awesome i leave all others dissapointed,not that it was bad but the bar has been raised very high now..

Have more than one which is what I do.

You are correct it does provide a level of familiarity that adds to the intimacy.  I really enjoy what I do ( if not I would be doing something else) but I enjoy it even more when the extra intimacy is there and that only comes from being very familiar with one another and it seems to benefit both of us. Suzee xoxo

Either way, your wallet will feel the same. So, do what makes you happy. If you prefer the connection type, I would say go for it but don't let anyone know. Because when they know, and things start going wrong they will say "We have warned you'". It is as if relationships go wrong only with providers. How many divorces are there each year in Atlanta?

Furthermore, when they say "We have warned you" the emphasis is not  the "You" as they would want to suggest. The emphasis is  the "We". We, we are the best, we know everything, We have warned you...
The "You" is the dumbass, the bad apple, the....

It's your money, do whatever makes you happy, in either case you are paying just as they are paying whether it is variety type or connection type.

" L' enfer c' est les autres". Friedrich Nietzsche

By that I mean it is easier to have a comfort level with someone so they start to let their guard down (on both levels)...You can really uncover any hidden fantasies and someone can truly let go. Meeting someone for the first time you wont fully understand their motives, needs etc.  

I have some great regulars whom I have seen grow on many levels with me.  That is why I love doing this

and I NEVER said "we" warned you. I said "I" warned you.  

"You" are not a "bad apple" but you are proving yourself to be a "dumbass". first rule when finding yourself in a hole "stop digging"

Don't be silly.  "We" never said you were a dumbass or implied "we" were without fault.  You came onto an adult hobby discussion board and asked if it was ok that you were falling in love with a provider.  You were given generally good advice by many well meaning folks.  The fact that you wouldn't or couldn't heed that advice is your decision.  Don't kill the messenger(s).  Especially when it was you asking for advice in the first place.

In life when you make choices there are consequences of those choices.  Dealing with that, and hopefully learning from that experience is part of what being an "adult" is all about.

PS:  That quote is Sartre, not Nietzsche.  The French probably should have given that away.

PPS:  Speaking of Nietzsche, I will give you one of his that you may ponder...

"That which does not kill us makes us stronger."

It's basically Freddy's way of saying "Suck it up, buttercup".
 

because it is supposed to be fun!

Here is the Wikipedia link to Sarte's often misunderstood quote,  L' enfer c' est les autres.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/No_Exit

Foguete's rule of hobby relationships gone wrong is:

Her fault
your fault
nobody's fault
keep it off the board or you will be ridiculed.

I'm sure Antares has a good heart, though.

-- Modified on 8/21/2015 1:56:09 AM

You are a gentleman and a scholar.  And possibly even a philosopher.  And I mean that as a compliment.

I agree on your observations.  I'm totally fine with a provider broadening my horizons (physically and mentally).  To that end, I'm always open to a total hottie giving me an out-of-body religious experience.  

Religious experience - yes.  Existential crisis - no.
 

and since I am still single ALL of those relationships by definition "failed", but you won't ever see me on this board whining like a love sick puppy, or even worse, getting all "angry and bitter" just because a relationship didn't work out.

News flash, virtually all relationships end at some point, coming here and whining about is like chumming the water for sharks.

Happy hobbying everyone! Thanks again Foguete69!

But - OK - that is just a tad morbid....

I enjoy the deep connection that comes with time. Check out this article. I only visit in the winter, sorry... we would have to be "Same Time Next Year".
Smiles and kisses,
Lillian
maturedesertflower.com

I will say that if ever lose my mind and get married again, there will NEVER be another divorce. There might be an "accident" however. lol

I just lost two long time providers and am hurting.  These are wonderful ladies who've moved on and life.  I am very proud of and happy for them, I know they meant a lot to me because there's an unfilled piece of my soul....I really feel hurt for losing them.

One I got to have a great goodbye session.  I told her how I've always felt, and we had the best time we'd ever had together, it was unrestrained.  We've still emailed checking on each other.

The other situation is a little different, and I didnt get to say goodbye.  My heart hurts, we had some great times, sometimes after sessions.......where she'd burrow into my arm and hug onto me and we'd talk.  I didnt say goodbye, have a last special session and I just feel, so, sad................

It's been a big adjustment hobby wise for me the last several months, I've really considered quitting altogether