I mean, really, if you think about it, this "job" kind of spills over into every other aspect of your life. Either you hide it or you don't with EVERYONE. And with the ones you hide it from, inevitably it is going to come out. Or else you always have that possibility in the back of your mind, lurking, looming. And with the ones who know, they either "support" you anyway, while under their breath they are murmering about how its wrong and you should stop, or they support you wholeheartedly (rare) in which case you are left wondering if they are sincere or even care, or if they are true friends.
As far as men go, most of them will either secretly resent you for selling what you won't give them, try to get freebies (why not- you do it all the time for money) or if they are romantic interests, try constantly to get you to stop. As if their love were enough reason even if they can't pay your bills.
And for women, outside of other providers, you are a thing despised and to be avoided at all costs. A threat to their relationships, an evil thing that only seeks to find men and have sex with them and take their money ... only one step away from the MOST despised: the SLUT (who does it for free)
And lets not forget the fact that once a provider, always will our view of men be tainted. I mean, lets face it, we see men doing their worst! Kissing their wives goodbye in the morning, then driving to work on the cellphone, setting up their morning or lunch or late afternoon rendezvous with infidelity. We know men like most women don't want to know.... the cold hard fact that most cannot be faithful. Even if the stats are not supporting this theory, all we see is the infidels, and there are enough of them to make one think that is all there is.
Now after all this consideration, the two questions presented are tough enough. Date a hobbyist? Well, the thing is, most will never get past the fact that you met that way. I know this from experience. They always have that like a trump card to play, and probability of the hobbyist developing feelings of a long term commited partner is low.
Date a "non-hobbyist" and then, tell or don't tell? Tell, and he may freak and leave. Don't tell, best case feel like your relationship is based on lies, worst case scenario he finds out through other means and feels decieved.
My solution? I don't date. I work. If I meet someone I like, I will become friends with him, and tell him what I do, and if it becomes serious, I will quit. But haven't found a man yet who can handle it.
Rhiannon
