Have done the falling-in-luv-with-a-provider thing many times. Just realized a few things. You have to begin with the proposition that the entire world is, in a sense, crazy, as R we (ie this community). The whole world is a dysfunctional family. (I no this shit; I've been thru rehab.) This is a kind of "Eyes Wide Shut" real-life community, ie without the sinister aspects of the Tom Cruise/Nicole Kidman movie. We R A community of sex providers and clients. In rehab terms, the clients are sex addicts, and the providers R from unstable homes with their own issues. So any attempt at a real relationship is going to produce explosive results. One provider I fell in luv with (kinda) and greatly admire, everyone knows her. I pissed her off. And now I'm on her shit list. Anyway, I'm writing this thread to apologize to her. She knows who she is. I didn't mean to disrespect U. I really didn't think I was. Anyway, I'm sorry we're not friends anymore, but I still like and admire U and am not mad. Thanks for letting me share.

I think 90% or more of the men who see providers are sex addicts. I know I am! Have been doing this for decades and have fallen hard for 2 women that let me into their real world. That was the issue for me and I try to keep it only about great sex

That is quite an asessment  
Sex and money. Money and sex.  
Good thing there is no substance abuse in all this.  

Like I said, or meant to say, we're all a little crazy. All families are dysfunctional, or so they say. Some provider becomes indignant. Says she's got no problems. Wow. I sure would like to meet her. Never known anybody like that. I wonder what she does for a living. Go Dawgs!

Whew! Thank you speaking up! Was a little outraged when I read that this morning too. Providers have numerous reasons for being in this biz. Same for clients. Many providers I've met simply want a better life for themselves and their children, families. Some have parents that are unable to provide for themselves. Some are just downright freaks and enjoy the thrill. We're not all drug addicts with creepy uncles. Clients aren't all sex addicts. I'd venture to say that more than half of my clients are in it for companionship and that the sex is just a bonus.  
If it eases your mind to use that as a justification for why this provider has no interest in dating you.. Kudos. But it's an ignorant comment. People from all walks of life can be compatible. You just need to find the right one for you.

Amen! Well said

Actually, I just had an appt w an extremely well-known provider and we said we loved each other at the end. So don't lecture me. The other girl. I do luv. She's not even a provider. More like a sugarbabe. So there. The point is, and it is incontestable, that we are all from families that are dysfunctional to one extent or another, and that we all have problems. All clients aren't sex addicts. Wake up. Smell the coffee. Somebody's being naïve. IE, I don't think u no what a sex addict is, unless maybe you're a mental health provider, which I don't think u r. me neither. just been there, done that. Go Dawgs!

Also, FYI, the last one I fell in love with left because I had to ask her to, because she became so upset that she also became irrational and out of control. I hated asking her to leave. offered to take her to a hotel. offered to pay the bill. she asked for money, because she needs it for some real-life issues. I gave her as much as she wanted because she really does need it, and I can afford it. That didn't help. She was still out of control emotionally. So, she had to leave. I called her back today, told her I loved her and that she is welcome at my house anytime, but she has to be nice. Like Patrick Swayze said in Road House, Be nice (until it's time not 2 b). I always try to be nice (until it's time not 2b). I'm not always nice. but I only lash out verbally. nothing else. and then if I've been not nice, I apologize, try to do better in the future, and move on. That's my code. And this message is addressed to another well-known provider whom I also luved (well kinda), and now I'm on her shit list. Just struck out with other one too. But maybe both will come back. I am a sex addict and a substance abuser. But like Billy Joel, I'm also a philosopher: "Honesty is such a lonely word; everyone is so untrue; honesty is seldom ever heard and mostly what I need from you." I always ask for and get sex (true some pay-to-play, but mostly cause I'm such a stud). Anyway that provider whose shit list I'm on, I'm still a fan.

I'm 100% heterosexual male. Never had a homosexual experience. Never wanted to, though I've had actually plenty of offers. I've kind of a metrosexual. I may seem gay, but I'm not. Some people have asked whether I am. I tell them no. I am a 100% heterosexual male. Luv the Ga BullDawgs,  
the South, the US of A, but most of all, pussy. Used 2 not like to eat it. Have changed. I'm not a woman, though that's a great question. I'm all guy. I just have an inner feminine something. I'm telling u, they really teach u this shit in treatment. some of it makes sense. Don't go there much anymore myself. U know, meetings, groups, shrinks. I'd rather eat pussy and smoke a doobie. Go Dawgs.

Like from everything you've said so far and the way you've said it, I can't imagine how you could have pissed her off and gotten on her shit-list.

I didn't come from a dysfunctional home. I came from a very happy home. Yet I made my way into substance abuse treatment centers where I encountered a great many people with a great many problems. I guess I was one of them. Maybe I still am. I don't know. But I have issues. So did a guy named Herschel Walker. His were actually a lot more serious than mine. But I got mine too. And if anyone reading this post or writing in this forum thinks they don't, wake up and smell the coffee. Anyway, I don't participate much here. Just thought I'd throw in a thought or two to make the conversation lively (as the guy said in the Big Chill). I luv the movies. And I luv providers. Just tend to get burned when I try to get to close. Maybe it's just me. Anyways, that's how they taught me to approach it in treatment. But I'm beginning to feel like I'm trying to be Dr. Phil at a Roman Orgy. So I"ll have a coke and a smile and shut the fuck up (as Eddie Murphy once said). See 48 HRS.

I mean, being a stud and all, maybe you don't. But I think all of your braggadocio is best directed to these women you love.

and have gone through rehab doesn’t mean everyone is dysfunctional. You may be dump and stupid that doesn’t mean rest of the world stupid.

that both men and women don’t have realistic and practical view of relationship. When you first fall for someone you do everything to please each other which unsustainable in the long run. When you fall out, neither don’t know what to do. Most reactions are to blame hate each other and talk bad about each other with.

as matter fact you are which is why you think everyone is crazy dysfunctional. May be she doesn’t want to see you or be friends is because you are crazy and dysfunctional

Exactly what I meant by healthy outlook in life and having personal convictions.

Will never go to one. They have tendency to make up issues. Most of the time you come out worse than before seeing them.

thanks for the feedback. Now I realize why I'm still on her shit list. So, like I said earlier, I'll have a coke and a smile and shut the fuck up. I won't do much posting. I won't however accept the charge that I was engaging in braggadocio, my good man. But like I said I won't participate here anymore, unless I say the right things instead of what I'm really thinking. Oh yeah, and the provider I was apologizing to. I'm still sorry. I'll try 2 do better next time, with somebody else if not u. I know how to act. Just like to let my hair down a little sometime. See Sidney Sheldon (The Naked Face).

Nucking Futs...that's a great costume for you.

Hobbyist, providers are what they do not who they are.  What about just falling in love with a person.  If her profession was different would it matter.  My belief is that these are just beautiful women that made certain career choices and it has nothing to do per se with who they are and their capacity to love.
Falling in love is falling in love and in many cases you can't help who you fall in love with, teacher, office administrator, doctor, unemployed etc. it shouldn't matter if you are really in love.  
If you are really in love you would take your best shot at pursuing her and be thankful for the experience and opportunity to have crossed paths with her.

second this!

Nucking Futs. I get it. that's funny. OK. no more posting 4 me. I guess the provider thinks i'm nucking futs too. so the apology won't wk. hey maybe I am nucking futs. I don't really think so though. How bout u? Anyways, I think I'll quit posting. Like the guy said in Big Chill, I'm just trying 2 keep the conversation lively. Also like they said, if u can't handle the heat, get out of the kitchen. But wait, I can handle the heat. not much fun doing it here though. maybe I should retire from hobbying. get a real job. Naaa.

amen

We do not need a therapy forum. Been there. Done that. I'd rather eat pussy. Sorry for being a pain in the ass. Or, thank you for letting me share.

Probably the most awesome commentary yet!

I wrote this post. And I know the provider whose shit list I am on has read it. She hasn't responded. I guess I need to make an appt 2 get off your shit list. But I don't even know whether you would want me to make an appt since we had such a bad fight. I'll give u a call and find out. If I'm off your shit list, I don't want an appt. If I'm still on your shit list, however, I would like an appt. So there, I'm a little crazy. PS: just kidding; I think I'll get the appt. Then maybe we can go 2 dinner.

If you get off her shit list and if you still will see her.
I must admit to my curiosity at this point.

I'll try. I'm not quite sure how to do it, however. I think I'll just have to go see my Uncle Benjamin.

But then there are other providers I also love. I'm getting along with some of them. So I don't know what to do. Pretty high class problems, huh.

love is a strong emotion to have.

Not many times. Always. You marry her or commit, no money required. Otherwise, direct or indirect, u always pay. And even the marriage thing is premised on the assumption that if the pussy is provided money will follow. Providers are great or not so great. The great ones, I don't think we're good enough for, quite frankly. Otherwise, we wouldn't have to pay her to be there. But wait a minute, we pay all of them to be there. But not always. That's called luv.

What I mean to say is when the guy wants the girl regardless of the pussy and the girl wants the guy regardless of the gelt, that's luv. does happen. that's what I was trying to figure out. Thanks. Oh, I also let u no about the provider. She's incredible. Beautiful, and in a really strong way, kind of like a warrior woman. Great mom. Loves to have all kinds of crazy fun. Difficult life though. I think I hurt her with words rather than action or conduct. Didn't realize it can hurt even more.

you have described a great many providers here.

then I've done good. Confidentiality, my friend. Confidentiality. That's what the girls do. Actually, I'm really in love with another one. Have you ever seen the movie, "The Italian Job." And I was in luv with yet another one before. Reminds me of the song Oh Suzanna. Elvis Presley, "What a Night."

Are you saying you fall in love with many of the providers you see ?
or are you saying one special warrior like mom pro so impressed you that you fell for her tried to
give her guidance then because she was beautiful, sexy, independent and fierce she got pissed and  
wala you were put on her shit list.
but
you also have seen another with similar characteristics that you have feelings for her as well and not yet on her shit list?

I'm in love with the Italian Job now. was in love with Oh Suz. Wasn't really in luv w current shit list girl, just loved her. you know what I mean. I've done the falling in love with a provider thing w Brandi (they're all Brandi), Oh Sue, and Job girl. Brandi however wasn't in love; it was just love. Oh Sue was the invisible man or woman (ie she doesn't exist). It's hard to explain. Job Girl is like my ex wife. a lot like. Beautiful. looks like a 20 something version of my ex, both are beautiful in exactly the same way. Both are like the most beautiful woman you've ever seen beautiful. Job has emotional problems as a result of very troubled best, bout the same as x. I've got similar emotional problems (cont subst, bipo). We got too close. Relationship blew. I didn't lose physical control, just verbal control. She was losing physical control. I had to ask her to leave, ie that's how it usually goes. but you see I didn't want her 2. But I had to cause she was out of control. Now I'd like to have her back, but she'll have none of it. However, I have a plan to get her back. Much too detailed to try to splain. But I gotta tell u, I could write a book or make a movie about the whole damn thing. Actually it's been done; pretty woman. I'll let u know how it turns out. I think I'd marry her. Go Dawgs.

actually, I don't think I'll try to get her back. more I think, more I realize, she's like oh sue (invisible too). I guess I'll just have to keep on looking. Meanwhile, I can't do anything with current provider except have appts w her and pay her for her time. Or maybe not. the rain check thing fucked me over. didn't handle it right. Word to wise. How bout them Geisha girls. Go Dawgs.

got a date with her for lunch in buck on mon. can't say where. I talked 2 her. don't think she has even read this. I guess lunch, then maybe, appt. let u no how it turns out if anyone is interested.

OK. Sun morn. lunch set for mon. could give hints but can't say where. something happened this wk. big. huge. let's put it like this, life is a movie, and this week I was George Clooney starring in the great thriller Michael Clayton. Had it been the civil war, I would have had to get out of town last nite or the bad guys would have sent more bad guys 2 do me in. Like I said, life is a movie. the bad guys might have got me. but the bad guys aren't who you think. they're just bullies. if u call bullshit on them, their power disappears. Go Herschel. Go Dawgs. LOL. I think I may take trip. can't decide. ga se coast. then maybe the big app. always wanted 2 meet Madonna. LOL. NOT.

who'da thunk

Thanks. For sharing Varmint. Great hearing of your exploits
Of love in a place that emphasizes separation of the heart and cash.  

well maybe not love. i'm mending my ways. think I may give up hobbying. beautiful young girls are all around. they seem to like older men with money. i'm going to take a test. cu later. to my cutie pie, I've just given up my ways. I must be crazy (LOL).