A regular lady I see, once told me.  Early on, I learned to have sex with a person, not a body.  It was a difficult lesson, but one I am sooooo glad I learned.  Would more men would learn that lesson.

As to those who are putting you down because you are not an expert on navigating TER.  Disregard them.  Your question has been asked many times, because it is one of the most common questions of someone first trying out this hobby.  In short, you are really quite normal, but once you try it, you will be normal with a grin on your face.