You know, women really are multi-faceted and complex creatures. We struggle with inner conflict, sometimes, and I am no exception. Making the smallest of decisions even can be difficult...
Lady Parts: Duchess, it has been a bit long. When ARE you going to post your availability again? There are, like, cobwebs down here.
Heart: Ugh, always so crass, LP. Duchess has far more noble things on her mind these days than just S-E-X.
Lady Parts: Do you mean, SEX, Heart? Geez, you can't even bring yourself to say the word, can you? SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX!!!
Heart: I can, too, for your information, Ms. Lady Parts. SOME of us just don't obsess on it all the time the way YOU seem to.
Boobs: Hey, lay off Lady Parts.
Heart: Like you're any better!
Lady Parts (muttering): Priss! Talk about a stick in the butt…
Butt: I resemble that remark! Also no sticks please.
Brain: Ladies, please! Duchess has a lot on her mind right now and this is NOT helping.
Lady Parts: Well, we have a proposition to make that should make this all very simple.
Heart: Oh, sure! I'll bet you do. Let me guess what THAT could be. This wouldn't have anything to do with LOVE, would it?
Lady Parts: Have you been listening to Delilah on the radio again? (makes fake gagging noise)
Heart: So what if I have?
Brain: If you two could stop arguing for five seconds, Duchess really needs to post her availability. She has new tires to buy!
Lady Parts: YAAYYYYYYYY! Forget the tires. We're getting laid!
Heart: NOOOOOOOO! She needs to devote her energy to saving the planet! And finding the love of her life! And doing good works! Like on Delilah!
Boobs: I'm going with Yay on this one.
Lady Parts: Well, maybe she is in a small way, you know, doing her part....
Heart: OMG, don't even try.
Lady Parts: Okay, okay, but when did having fun start being against the law?
Brain: Um….
Boobs: I'm taking the 5th on this one.
Heart: Lady P, I swear, sometimes you are so butt stupid!
Butt: Again with the remarks!
Brain: Okay, that's it. I'm making an executive decision. Duchess is posting her availability. I expect
everyone involved to cooperate.
