i was watchin one of them news specials on cheating.  I wandered to myself why do i cheat on my wife?  this thread prompted in my brain by discussion below on the woman that got taken away from the man below.

if someone took my wife away i'd be so heart broken.  sometimes I feel guilty for looking at another woman and thinkig abut getting down her pants.  it's human nature to salivate over others, i know but i wonder what i would do if she left me.  so i ask myself, why do i cheat?  my wife is gorgeous, and its got nothing to do with her age.  she is 41 years old but looks 10 years younger.i see other mens' chops dripping with lust ewhen very time we go even to some place like the drug store.  she's thin and hot with big knockers.  she's smart, she makes more money than i and she does every thing for me, cooks, doesn't clean anymore because we have enough know for a maid.  ok, getting to the point she is every thing i need but still not enough.i have reached the mountain top and can't get any higher can only go lateral.  

you hobbyists ever feel that way about your wives?  i am thinking that not everyone here's gotta fat heifer for a wife.  i always assume before i hobbied and before i got married that other husbands who wander off its because they got a fat heifer on their hands.  but now im in the position of bein married to a hot babe but i still wanna bang other babes.  what to do?  this question more for those married to good looking babes.  for futher clarification my wife gave me permission to bang other ladies but it makes me feel worse than if she didn't know

I love this philosophical stuff. Not just the usual. Sometimes I get into it with providers, although not about this particular topic!

Congrats on having a great wife! You are making me jealous! I'm 41, single and have only ever met one woman who I would consider marrying, but it did not work out. Honestly, I can't imagine having someone around all the time, but who knows--that didn't seem to be a problem when I was with her. Actually, now I'm glad I didn't get married, but that's a different story.

Anyway...

Although it might sound corny, variety is the spice of life. No matter how great things are, it's human nature to want something (someone) different from time to time.

This may be over-simplifying things, but think about your favorite restaurant--great place, right? Now imagine eating there 3 meals a day, 24/7/365, every day, every meal--even breakfast, late-night snack, and Thanksgiving. Mmmm, turkey--oh, wait, they probably don't serve that, do they? I don't know about you, but I'd lose interest eventually. Maybe even sneak out to go to McDonald's! Although relationships aren't food, this is as close an analogy that I can think of at the moment.

From what you wrote, I assume you love your wife. I don't think you "love" any provider.  Interesting that your wife has given you permission to see other women. Does that work both ways? (Hey, what about a 3-way? Just thinking out loud.) How does she feel about you? You say that you would be heart-broken if your wife left you. Do you ever consider that a realistic possibility?

I'd be interested in what anybody else thinks...

Married, Got EVERYTHING you need, Beautiful wife who is hot...Brother, you got it made in the shade. If I had all that, I wouldn't be hobbying, If I even had a GF that comes near what you described I wouldn't be hobbying...Matter of fact, If I had a GF or SO, I don't think I could be in this hobby. Yea, Definately Not! Count your blessings My Friend cause not all Hobbyists lives are like that. Man...Appreciate what you have...You never know when it might be taken away.

One more thing...Let me get this straight...your wife gave you permission to do it with other women??? That only makes her even Hotter. Damn...some dudes are TOO LUCKY



-- Modified on 11/13/2004 9:02:37 AM

my friend guz let me tell you this much.  she used to be a provider i am not saying who but she likes women too.  so i think she understands what its like to be a man.she more/less told me go ahead and do it.  she said 'i can't stop you from catting around when i'm not around so you do what you want to do just don't tell me about it' which makes me paranoid shes cheating but that's another story for a later time.  plus i never really felt good enough for her, she is better educated than me and i think she just likes me for my tools.  if she were in love why would she give me the oK?

i'm basically a house husband and work parttime as a trained massage therapist.  which  puts me around tons of hot babes too (and tons of nonhot babes) but believe or not the hot ones outweight the mediocure ones.  i think the reason being is  according to the wife i am a better than average looking joe. so i get geared up being around these women but you know what they say never mix business with pleasure.  plus don' want to get sued if i hit misread the signals and hit on the wrong chick.  

so i go home and got half the day to myself, half the week to myself, maybe got too much time on my hand.  and the rest of the day im sittin around horny and don't feel like waiting for the wife to come home from work (not providing any more she's got an office job banking serious dough).  i try to save money by jacking off to computer porn but it aint the same.  she is all woman and more but i can't get my act together and stay faithful.  she would do me every time i wanted some action but may be i just want all the chicks in the hen house.

Many people feel that man as a species is not naturally monogomous. I disagree. I think that the inability to be monogomous has more to do with what's in the individual's head (the big one) than anything else. I was monogomous for 18 years of marriage because I was completely happy and was not looking for anything or anyone else. My wife provided comfort, excitement, ecstacy, pride, friendship and joy throughout our life together. Don't get me wrong, there were times that we fought and argued, but our marraige was wonderful. I wasn't looking for anything more than what she gave me. Perhaps the answer to your question lies in a different question entirely. What do you want and need from your marriage? And just to clarify; if my wife had been taken away from me by another man I wouldn't be hobbying right now, I'd be serving time for murder. She was taken by ovarian cancer.

Dogtrained,

This is the second or third post like this from you.  All having to do with the same subject.  Why do you persist on discussing these topics here?

JT

Guys....try this Gender change.  He for she.  It still reads pretty logically don't you think??

my friend guz let me tell you this much.  I used to be a provider i am not saying who but I likes women too.  so i think I understand what its like to be a man. He more/less told me go ahead and do it.  He said 'i can't stop you from catting around when i'm not around so you do what you want to do just don't tell me about it' which makes me paranoid he's cheating but that's another story for a later time.  plus i never really felt good enough for him, He is better educated than me and i think he just likes me for my tits.  if he were in love why would he give me the oK?

i'm basically a house WIFE and work parttime as a trained massage therapist.  which  puts me around tons of hot guys too (and tons of nonhot guys) but believe or not the hot ones outweight the mediocure ones.  i think the reason being is  according to the husband i am a better than average looking jane. so i get geared up being around these men but you know what they say never mix business with pleasure.  plus don' want to get sued if i hit misread the signals and hit on the wrong guy.  

so i go home and got half the day to myself, half the week to myself, maybe got too much time on my hand.  and the rest of the day im sittin around horny and don't feel like waiting for the husband to come home from work (not providing any more he's got an office job banking serious dough).  i try to save money by jacking off to computer porn but it aint the same.  He is all man and more but i can't get my act together and stay faithful.  He would do me every time i wanted some action but may be i just want all the guys in the hen house.

yeah i think maybe i feel sorta off after i am done.  all my friends joke to me they would kill to bang my wife so me thinks i should appreciate what i have before she finds a man she considers better.
also plus im sorta spending her money doing it.

maybe    you think its funny to crack on me but i was bein serious.
just because i am a sensitive man who thinks deep about this stuff and shows some emotions occassionally from time to time doesnt mean im some sissy as you imply.if you dont like what i post then dont read so you can make fun of other peoples posts.

thats the problem.i think i would go ballistick if i think she was doing some other man.  no i never gave her permission or implied it was oK
 

sorry to hear that but wuyld you really kill some man over a woman?

When you get down to it we are just sophisticated animals and it's tough to suppress that manly urge!  I have a beautifullly hot wife as well but her sex drive and mine, opposite spectrums.  My wife is high maintanence and expects to be "taken care of"  I cant say if she was more open, that I would not hobby but we dont have a great relationship to begin with.  She has offered to let me watch her with another woman but she wont take the initiative and if I push it, I'm the scumbag.  We even visit strip clubs together from time to time, but I can't really enjoy myself, the mrs. is a little jealous.  I used to have my time with the ladies in my day hence being able to score a hot wife but after 10 years of the same person, nothing new, no initiave or creativity I need that lusty passion but don't have the time or energy to put into seeing someone on the side.  I can say if my wife took half as much effort into pleasing me as I do to please her, I don't think  I'd chance messing that up, especially if she put in the effort as some of these lovely providors.  Question for the ladies, if you are seeing someone who is married do you mind seeing the ring on their finger or not?  Great topic DT!  Man....you married a provider!  I have to place you just behind the might Jep!

We all love BBBJ in variety of ways. How do you feel your wife kissing your kids in the morning or your mother on her cheeks after a night of endless passion?

Just a though. A wife is someone who makes your home. She comforts you when you need it and is a life partner. There are many things that one may not choose to do with his wife. That’s personal choice and cannot be answered by a simple discussion here.

I am 27 and have a beautiful 23 year old wife, that gets hit on by atleast 10 guys a day. Married for 3 years and very happy with married life.  

I am sure we all have watched Robert Deniro in Analyze This.
When asked by a Billy Crystal "why do you need other women?" a simple answer I have needs.

Dogtrained - We all have our own reasons for being involved in this hobby. My reasons are almost opposite of jeopcons, I got married when I was young and did not realize how much great sex I was missing.

It is very difficult for us to comment on why you want to cheat or whether you should cheat. My philosophy is to decide what I  want to do and then do it right, not to sit around and worry about things. I don't like to give advice, but you keep getting on this board and asking for it. Decide what you want to do, the decision is only yours, and quit whining. If you decide to continue seeing other women, then share your experiences and quit using this board as a psychologists couch. If you continue to be so internally torn then use some of the money you use on providers and go get some profesional advice. Sorry for sounding a little harsh, but you seem to keep coming back to this board with similar questions, while providing little information.

thank you muff,i guess thank you.after reading these post i decided to continue hobbying, you know my wife did say to get a hobby so this was it.

yes i married a provider who i told her that she could still provide but thats it.she decided to take a real job and makes more now.to me if i let her provide it is different from letting her shlep other men she picks up at a bar for example.to me work is work.i met her 3 years back and now here we are.  this might blow some of you away but my wife makes me feel like a sex object sometimes and nothing more.she says it is hard to talk to me and shes always grabbing my goods sometimes everyday without so much a how are you doin. basically treats me like some sex machine.  one reason i do hobby's is because other providers talk to me more than my wife.i miss the intimacy of connecting mind wise.but i shoulda have know when i married her she probably got some kind of intimacy issue.i was flattered when she chose me because she was engaged to a millionaire and dumped him for me.shes the one who asked me to marry her.
but when we go to her uppity work parties i see her flock to the older wealthier men and then before she leaves she tells me to 'go flirt' or something.so i just figure she doesnt care what i do.

true i dont provide much information.i apologize for that but i dont like to do graphic reviews.maybe i can post a lightreview on this board.sometimes i get special favors and i think they are favors because noone posted that info in their review.so i didnt think it fair to include and not include the information in my reveiws. i was at loss to what to include that would be appropriate. i figure it out eventualy.ive seen maybe 30plus laidies noiw so may be high time for me to contirbute.plus ihate typing not good at it.

I suggest you read this:  http://www.freewebs.com/magicallizzy/mensexuality.htm  , especially the part about monogomy.

Lizzy

-- Modified on 11/14/2004 7:42:59 AM

I just think you're full of it, that's all.  And yes, when I see stupid topics posted by you I usually do ignore them.  But you leave yourself open to skepticism so don't play the oh woah is me crap ok?

You bring it onto yourself.  If you can't take the heat, stop posting this stupid crap, ok?  What other responses are you really expecting?  You obviously have some personal problems to deal with so seek some professional help.  I could care less what you do with your personal life, who you're married to, what she/he does and everything else that dribbles out of your pathetic brain and to your keyboard.  Why should I care?  I don't.

Try contributing to the board and post some reviews???

I plan to ignore dogtrained until he/she actually contributes something other than stupid topics in the General Discussion area.

I would encourage all of you to stop wasting your time by placating him/her by responding/posting to this stuff.

Why do I cheat? I don’t consider this activity as cheating and breaking the trust with  my significant other,  or a betrayal of the sanctity of marriage ( if and when I get married!) .
I simply equate it  to having a simple excursion such as playing a round of golf in the afternoon. It is just a need to have fun without any puritan sense of morality attached to  hobbying activities.  

I love my girlfriend; she is intelligent, loving, level headed, sweet, and beautiful. And cherish our shared time together...be it vacationing in the islands, a week long gateway in Paris, or exploring the ruins of old roman civilization, or safari in the Kenyan wilderness…or just a night out in our beautiful city to see a play or an opera at the Kennedy center, or even discuss NY times or post editorials while sipping double tall late at Starbucks.  I have such a rich and fulfilling life... a rather uncomplicated  and multidimensional existence.

And yet I love to spend time with beautiful providers with all its gratifications, and the mental freedom it endows me without any guilt or morale decadence.  I love having a relaxed and fulfilling time with providers without any inhibition within a level of personal respect.

I love women and openly express my affections during our engagement be it an hour or two.  I would like to make my time “special” for both of us.  I am also respectful of their personal boundaries, and bring a gift such as flowers, perfumes...chocolate….good bottle of wine as a thank you to make my presence welcome. It has been reciprocated with equal appreciation, even with  completely fatigued out of town visitors.

Lighten up folks, it is just an adult fun, and outlet for us civilized animals with genetical disposition for wondering... the gypsy in us …where the  mighty sky is our roof and the enchanted land with all it beauties our dwelling.