Washington DC
Re: PM'ing someone for information ?
(i am refering to emails, more than pm's- just my two cents) I agree 100%. when someone just sends me a one line question, no matter what it is, i never answer. it makes it seem like you dont have the time or wont put in the effort to include your name or anything about yourself or what part of the county your in. YOU SOUND LIKE A SPAMMER or much worst.
you guys have to understand, providers generaly view initial emails/phone calls as unsafe, who in the world is contacting me? robber/mugger, rapist, timewaster, LE? Your initial contact should be thought out to some degree, if you really intersted in the provider your contacting. not like you sent this one sentance to everyone on eros in your area.
Ahhhhh feels so much better to get this out. i rarely respond to someones direct question. guys include in an email that your a member at xyz and your member name, or something about yourself. Ladies are into first impressions, to generalise, if i may say so.
But all i really need to know to begin some dialog is that your on this or that board, and you handle, so im not thinking the worst of the top.
thanks Sonic_R6 for posting.
Am I too uptight or is there a proper way to ask a reviewer a question after reading their review?
I've been getting a few PM's recently about my reviews and they just go into question mode with no introduction, "thanks", etc.
Personally, when I PM someone trying to get information I put in the subject line: Thanks for your review on "Jane Doe". And go into the request with a tone of appreciation and thankfulness.
Not-- was this on the menu. do you think this. end of PM. and no thanks.
I'm probably being over critical.
WTF...They should say THANKS or something..
I always appreciated to ppl even tho it was small favor..I've met couple of cool reviewers in TER and we had good conversations..
If someone expects the courtesy of a response, they should ask politely. Follow your instincts.
your procedure is quite gracious.
if i recognize the questioner from board posts as someone having a good attitude overall, i'd be inclined to overlook some niceties in asking a question.
if it is someone i don't know from anywhere or doesn't have any review history or even worse is someone who i may feel uncomfortable about for some reason.... my response is "everything i have to say about that provider is in my review".
i will only be happy to give out additional information to someone capable of independent thought and making up their own mind.
afterall, someone read your review and thought enough of you to ask. But we all set our own standards when it comes to responding anyway, so no big deal. If you find the inquiries rude, just don't respond or tell them why you choose not to answer them.
It's all good. Just like your reviews, PM inquiries are your call. I pretty much answer all.
I have heard personally from more than a few ladies that they have a person that they won't see anymore for many reasons. Sometimes our ladies even have ex-boyfriends that are on TER.
The PM's from these people can be potentially dangerous. Like if they ask what hotel was she staying at or what room number was she in recently.
One lady five years ago in Dallas Texas told me, one guy booked an appt./got verified and then the a guy she wouldn't see again showed up at her door. She ended up calling the police to get him out of the room. So be careful as you really don't know who the person PM'ing is or what there motive is.
One lady from Boston last year Pm'd several of us from the DC board trying to schedule appts in advance of her stay. One guy even volunteered to pick her up at the Airport. Apparently, he suddenly thought he was her possesive boyfriend and wanted off the clock time as a reward for a cab ride. Then he PM'd several of her clients that wrote reviews, looking for details so he could stalk her. She had to change Hotels. She had to change phone numbers and email address's cause he filled her in box's first with appollogies, then compliments, then Anger and Threats.
Just be careful is all I am saying.
if the guy is asking for too much information, don't respond. i would never ask for or give out detailed information about location.
it is the same with details about menu and whether there is OTC time in exchange for favors. some guys try exploit every little situation to try to get an advantage and make it difficult for all of us.
the model i use is: if asked for a favor, give it or not but don't use it as a bargaining chip. if granted a favor, accept it or not but don't read anything into it.
and if you are in the habit of exchanging favors with a provider, never NEVER reveal that in a PM. it could make her job very difficult with unwelcome demands on her and ruin your relationship with her.
Not everyone is mentally equipped to be a part of the hobby (or society for that matter). It's naive of the gentleman-hobbiest to assume that all have benign intentions. I have happily answered PMs, but when they ask for TMI I disregard the message, or simply state "My review stands."
I know of more than one lady who had to take an extended sabbatical, change names, and/or move to a different part of the country because someone just couldn't understand the rules.
Guys, if we help the stalkers scare away the good ones, we will just be left with ourselves. And my size 15 feet don't look good in high heels.
previous posts. Pretty much answering means pretty much answering reasonable requests. Good points Topper. Extra time, off menu items, locations, etc. are not reasonble requests. Again, good clarifications. I just am not concerned how polite they are towards me in PMs.
(i am refering to emails, more than pm's- just my two cents) I agree 100%. when someone just sends me a one line question, no matter what it is, i never answer. it makes it seem like you dont have the time or wont put in the effort to include your name or anything about yourself or what part of the county your in. YOU SOUND LIKE A SPAMMER or much worst.
you guys have to understand, providers generaly view initial emails/phone calls as unsafe, who in the world is contacting me? robber/mugger, rapist, timewaster, LE? Your initial contact should be thought out to some degree, if you really intersted in the provider your contacting. not like you sent this one sentance to everyone on eros in your area.
Ahhhhh feels so much better to get this out. i rarely respond to someones direct question. guys include in an email that your a member at xyz and your member name, or something about yourself. Ladies are into first impressions, to generalise, if i may say so.
But all i really need to know to begin some dialog is that your on this or that board, and you handle, so im not thinking the worst of the top.
thanks Sonic_R6 for posting.
Unfortunately it looks like your attempt to purchase VIP membership has failed due to your card being declined. Good news is that we have several other payment options that you could try.
We thank you for your purchase!
Membership should be activated shortly. You'll receive notification!
