My wife and I have separate checking accounts, and have requested no bank statements to be mailed or e-mailed to me.

We have 1 joint acct together that part of our payroll check gets deposited in to & then each have our own personal account for "play money". ; )

separate acounts as noted above and cash those expense reimbursement checks. I am lucky I get reimbursed for business mileage so I use that money to hobby.

When you get cash at the machine you put $20 - $40 aside. If you get an expense check, rebate, refund, etc you deposit most but keep some for the hobby.   It adds up if you work on it over time.

NO EASY ANSWER.  No risk tolerance; no hobby.  One step, of course, is it have separate checking accounts.  The better (and supporting answer) is to be on the same page with your spouse or SO.  There must be a level of trust that she knows who you're coming home to ... that is, who is the end all of the relationship.  The second part is having the spouse or SO have the trust and confidence that you can do with your funds whatever you want to do and yet to be comfortable that 100% of you is coming home at the end of the day.  That's what works here.  We have no long conversations; just otherwise responsibility to each other.

Sounds strange but if he starts to pretend drink and has her believing he has a drinking problem, she will have all her attention concentrated on that. The money would be considered drink money.  Then when you get to the edge where she is really pissed.  Quick drinking.  LOL. devilish but it works.. You end up looking like a hero.  Its twisted enough to work.

Re: How do you married guys....

Get Divorced like me