Washington DC

"Outing" the outed -- generally speaking
Amanda Ball 3517 reads
posted

I notice that a specific discussion of outing seems to have been removed from this board.  I don't want to resurrect it, but I have something more general to say.

I'd simply like to say to the gentlemen and lady who commented on the supposed "outing," any provider who has posted her picture on the internet has already outed herself.  I think they call that "in the public domain" in legal parlance.

In fact, if you have someone who has a pathologically obsessive interest in your person, posting your picture is what crosses the threshold, not the considerably more gentle but also slightly obsessive interest in a possible name change expressed here by any TER members.      

dragoon72181 reads

It is an axiom of this business that you can't do business unless you post your picture.  How many would come see you if they didn't know what you looked like and you had no reviews?  In other words, moving is the easier way for this lady to hide from a stalker than deciding not to post her picture.  The previous poster's comments drew attention to that move and the new ad and that was both unnecessary and unwise...especially for someone who considers himself a fan of the lady.

D7

I allowed this so we could discuss the pros and cons of the advertising ideas and public domain.

I will not tolerate re-hashing the other incident

You are not talking in generalities; you are discussing a specific scenario which is unique and specifically addressing a recent topic removed by TER. I will try to answer in as general terms as you have.

If in my researching why a particular provider changed her name and later determined that it was based on issues of safety, out of respect, I would not post who she use to be and make every effort to discontinue an already started thread. That is my view and not one which I would force on others.

As for public domain, while the information is within public domain at the time it was written, this site and its content is owned by TER and can be removed at their discretion with or without cause. I for one didn't feel the discussion brought out any useful information and with the slightest concern for a providers safety was best to have been removed.

If you are a provider – would you like me to respect you the same way?

It is undisputable and leave much open for discussion that if someone wished to hide for safety reasons and changed her name and website, it would have best to have considered masking her face. Why she didn't is in question here I guess. Since I am not this person, I can't know why and don't really think it is important enough to discuss, her prerogative.

As for it crossing a threshold what threshold? That is subjective and open to opinion which again doesn't need to be discussed her unless it is to serve others with insights to the make up of this person’s character. I don't wish to know that much about someone as it is hard enough trying to understand those I work and live with day to day...

Final comment - I think this subject would be a good one if it was not specifically addressing a recent scenario and also would be best brought to the National Board for general discussion – not posted on the board that removed the original post.

Amanda Ball2376 reads

...we have no idea of facts of any specific thing, ever.  Certainly alarms may be sounded here, but can they be always be believed?  

We all understand to take everything we read here with a grain of skepticism, including claims that may be used to squelch the distribution of information.  

Name changes are commonly dispensed information here and useful.  

There are basically two questions then.  

Who then makes the decision that some claim (credible or not) should be believed and some thread stopped or some information prevented from being shared?  

I think the answer to that first question relates directly to the second question.  Doesn't the self-posting of a face picture and contact information on the public internet comprise a move by the one person with the greatest interest that is essentially the essence of the dissemination of the information?

My point is: don't shoot the reader.  Or the person who relates what he read or saw.  

If the provider asks that the thread be pulled, then it should be pulled.  But even that is problematical, since she started the ball rolling with her ad.

What would be worse is if the free flow of information in this marketplace of information was staunched becasue of some misplaced belief of some reported problem.  

The issue of disemmination or no dissemmination is for her to decide, not the TER members.  And her initial posting would seem to be a statement in favor of dissemminating.

     

1 – “...we have no idea of facts of any specific thing, ever.  Certainly alarms may be sounded here, but can they be always be believed? “

- While I don’t feel like I’m a Lemming, blindly following others when alarms go off, I would rather err on the side of safety and believe that there could be a real cause and reason for alarm.– after that I could care less if it was fiction or fact. I still ask you – would you want the respect paid this provide or not?”


2 – “We all understand to take everything we read here with a grain of skepticism, including claims that may be used to squelch the distribution of information.”

- Agreed – including skepticism about you and your intent. I still do not understand why there is a debate when it comes to a matter of personal safety. Take the case recently where the TSA Marshals shot and killed someone who presented an unknown threat. While no one could be sure he was carrying a bomb, the shot and killed him because he could have and that is acceptable cause for lethal force. In this case do you debate it, make unfounded claims, hold someone suspect of there true intent, allow others to flame each other all to determine if there was a real safety issue? No – you shoot the thread dead and leave it to be discussed where you have an audience that wants to here all sides and facts. That is my opinion and not the cause for why the thread was dropped and voices were squelched. That you have to argue with the moderators – of both DC and LV boards. The LV board moderator has since closed the thread. Have you presented your case there?

3 – “Name changes are commonly dispensed information here and useful.”

- Agreed. And if it was just that and no information came out indicating safety issues it would have been welcomed with open arms. I’m also sure there would have been a long debate as to what the cause for name change since apparently it is precieved by most ho0bbyist as an act of deception hiding bad reviews and the reasons for those. It wasn’t just a matter of name changes once someone brought to light an issue of safety.  

4 – "There are basically two questions then. “

- Good Question -  

Question 1 - “Who then makes the decision that some claim (credible or not) should be believed”

- Each person who reads the threads and information found in other threads related to the claim will make a decision to believe a claim or not to believe a claim. They may look further to determine what is the truth and facts supporting the claim. But most of the claims I see posted are not based on facts but are subjective opinions and open for doubt, questions and debates.

Example - If this was a claim that a provider doesn’t treat everyone the same and you have two or more sides speaking out on it, who decides if any ones point of view or opinion is to be believed – you make your own decision, case by case.. Again, this claim had safety overtones which in my opinion it was properly handled.

Question 2 - “Who then makes the decision that some thread should be stopped or some information prevented from being shared?  

- Policy, the moderators, staff and admin. But I bet you already knew this answer.

5 – “I think the answer to that first question relates directly to the second question.”
- I disagree and have shown you why in the comments written above. The moderator seldom inflects his personal opinions and beliefs on a board – at least on this board. He has allowed open discussion on many subject and unless it violated TER Policy or was started to disrupt or becomes disruptive, does not provide a significant benefit (such as sports talk – LOL) the post will be allowed. If you wish to find out more, I suggest you ask each moderator and see what they say. I would be willing to bet that each handles their board a little different.

6 – “Doesn't the self-posting of a face picture and contact information on the public internet comprise a move by the one person with the greatest interest that is essentially the essence of the dissemination of the information?”

- Yes, but how it relates to this subject is really the case. While it is not known why someone would openly post her face and provide contact information only to later state the change was made for safety is subjective and open for discussion – with the provider if she so wished to. Your interpretation would appear that she granted open dissemination of her new information on the TER board. I don’t disagree, but this, as I’ve said, would require the answer to why be provided by her. An explanation was provided; it was her intent to protect herself. While it wasn’t the answer we would have expected of someone who has posted her face and information that the fact she gave an explanation was enough and with regard to personal safety – it’s better to err and pull the post – that is my opinion – ask the Moderator.

7 – “My point is: don't shoot the reader.  Or the person who relates what he read or saw. “

- The removal of the post was not shooting the reader. But the person who related what he read provided the possible cause for it’s removal – again – safety.

8 – “If the provider asks that the thread be pulled, then it should be pulled.  But even that is problematical, since she started the ball rolling with her ad.”

- I disagree. Just because a provider doesn’t like what’s been said or written shouldn’t be enough to have it pulled. That would mean any provider who doesn’t like a thread where her name, services, request for information, good bad or indifferent including comments made about her take precedence above what the intent of this board is about. Sharing of information that is not harmful, spiteful, mean or in this case, a possible safety issue should be allowed as long as it doesn’t violate other TER policies. Anyway this is contradictory to your comment (6).

The only case where this in fact would apply is if in fact a provider doesn’t like what’s being said or posted or reviewed and has asked or requested to be de-listed. In this case, no discussion would be allowed.

9 – “What would be worse is if the free flow of information in this marketplace of information was staunched because of some misplaced belief of some reported problem. “

- I can agree to this as long as it has nothing to do with personal safety. Determining misplaces beliefs should be determined after you can prove by fact or evidence there is no safety issue. That’s why the Marshals are instructed to shoot first and ask questions later. This is to eliminate the threat to many. In this case I would have removed the thread to protect the provider allowing for later discussion such as this.

10 - “The issue of dissemination or no dissemination is for her to decide, not the TER members.  And her initial posting would seem to be a statement in favor of disseminating.”

- Dissemination of her information and any other provider information is what TER is about. And TER is about members and what they share with each other. However, passing information where one knows there is a possible safety issue or is threatening in nature shouldn’t be allowed. The only exception would be if a provider was knowingly passing STD’s. Yet even in that case I don’t believe it should be posted openly without first showing the proof or evidence that someone is passing STD’s – how would we know it’s not someone who is vindictive?
All that I’ve share such as yourself are independent point of view. I appreciate you effort to post on this subject. Yet I still feel this isn’t something which needed to be discussed here as much as it should be posted to the National Board.

I wait for your comments to my post with great anticipation. That is to say if our Moderator doesn’t remove it first… Oh, and you might want to ask the Moderator by PM to answer these questions and voice his point of view.

...did you really type that while driving?

Wow. I'm impressed.

Amanda Ball2044 reads

Makes the most sense.  It's essentially a free speech kind of issue.  And free speech is what this place is kind of about.  But free speech may and should be infringed when public safety is the issue.

That said, I only have two more points.

The first one is that it is illegal to shout "Fire!" in a crowded theater.  But do we then punish the guy who then asks, "Did she say, 'Fire?'"  You get my point.  Safety was kind of eschewed by the larger act of putting the face/info out there.  (Maybe that even means that the provider has already solved her problem, and we are running around like Chickens Little for no reason.)

Secondly, you know all those reviews about me that are bad?  Well they were all posted by my dangerous ex-husband, using various names.  They need to be taken down.  The only true ones are the ones over 8.  And now that I have changed my name and have no reviews at all, I don't want you or anyone else to talk about my name change.  It's a safety issue.

(Typed while servicing a customer.  You know who you are.)  

-- Modified on 12/9/2005 10:38:55 AM

Amanda - really, I understood your point long ago. But I don't think you got mine when it comes to free speech and a privately owned website. They have been, and are continuously, monitoring the assumed free speech you talk about. When that free spoken word (typed in this case) violates a TER policy, they exercise their freedom to remove posts and reviews... Don’t take it personal, they have removed a few of mine… As you know, they even removed one from another poster to your thread here – or didn’t you notice that?

The one thing I've not mentioned is, -  I know the messenger that this subject started from and when he realized why the name and site were changed, he posted it and admitted it wasn't intended to cause harm, and discontinued discussing it.

So, it's not about killing the messenger - it's about the presumed freedoms and rights while being either a member of TER or a provider and what affects how information is accepted or not.

I take it your last paragraph was a cynical comment meant in good humor and not to be taken seriously - or was it??? If you wish to continue discussing your point of view on this let's take it off the board - email me at [email protected].

Thanks for the discussion....

And how did that client feel about you typing this post while he was posting his type - LOL...

(now let me see how I get out of this snow bank I pulled into while driving)

You can be "serviced" while you're driving.  You know, from underneath the steering wheel...;)

Yes - but it wasn't me this time - LOL - maybe it will be me the next time... Can you see it? Both of us typing post, me driving, her servicing - LOL..

I shouldn't be here - had too good a time tonight....

Saw two touring ladies myself, this week.  Can't complain.  Shit eating grin finally wore off from yesterday, though... Will review both but not sure if one has a permanent website.  One whale of a dancecard on for next week!

-- Modified on 12/9/2005 10:47:33 PM

Wow, I went through a whole cup and 1/2 of coffee to get all the point by points.

Below it was stated under point #2 "The LV board moderator has since closed the thread. Have you presented your case there?"

Closed is the operative word here. Not deleted because no fault was seen in the original post, it was just that some people got slightly out of hand, which happens some times at all boards.

Personally, I am truly in this for the hobby it truly is. I find this all very interesting.

Hope I still have friends in DC. lol Cause I'd like you all to have a wonderful happy and joyful holiday season and even better hobbying new year. Can't wait to come back!

It was too long for me to read...

The “operative word” closed not removed is subjective and after all that was said what is your point? I guess some are still wondering why it was remove, or even are angry at this decision, but what’s the point here that hasn’t already been discussed.

Have you noticed a flurry of interest in this subject and post??? Here is DC we look at things differently, nothing wrong with that….

The fact is was removed and not just closed is up to the moderators – are you expecting our DC Mod to give you a public explanation or answer. Have you sent a PM to our Mod or do you feel this is something he must answer in public - I wouldn't go there.... I would consider this subject closed and won’t reply to any other posts publicly. I guess I’ll have to find Amanda Bells email address if she replies…

No one is banishing you or anyone else for that matter from the DC board – it’s not up to us anyway – that too is a board Moderators position – but it could be based on the request’s of many DC members – or maybe not…

So, have a Wonderful, Happy, and Joyful Holidays Season - and a Happy Hobbying New Year - I wish this for All TER Member’s across the World....

I told you my position in a pm on this subject..

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