rather than running around with someone else for real, maybe permanently, intentionally or not

If I  was was getting any level of sex at home I would not be in the hobby, period.

I was referring to anyone being worried about stufff like hiv, etc.?//

Are you kidding , if you are married, and you hobby you are cheating and could get caught, what other inherent risk is there.  If you bring something home you will have been caught.

I am married and I know the risks, and have chosen to take the risks.  I love young pussy, end of story

...but have responses to two of them.  With respect to being married, the answer is yes, and married for a long time.  Did not get into all this until my spouse decided, unfortunately, that being married did not include sexual intimacy. After that, my life took a different path, and I pursued and found intimacy outside of marriage.  I have some favorite ladies and usually restrict my involvement to my favs/ATFs. If there was sexually intimacy at home then would not be doing this. That may not be true for others, but am absolutely certain it would is true in my case. If I was not so old and did not have family, then would pursue a serious relationship with just one other person.  Have met a few ladies that I wish I had met under different circumstances.  But these are the cards that have been dealt at this time in life, so will play with that hand.  There is no problem in bringing anything home, since physical contact with the wife is minimal and certainly not of an intimate nature.  Not sure how she could possibly catch anything from me, unless she drank out of the same glass.

The inherent risk is your wife will find out that you are cheating on her and divorce you, taking all your assets including your IRAs and 401ks, your dog, your car, your cat, your guns, your  boat, your hamster, your parrot and everything else you love. You may be able to keep your lawn mower, but will have to mow her lawn for free. Your relatives will side with your wife and shun you.

I got into hobbying because the wife wasn't giving any.  We recently split up but I'm still hobbying.  I've dated a lot but not too many women fuck like providers.  It's tough to go back to vanilla sex when you've been exposed to such a high level of fucking.

He is 100% right, including mowing her lawn hahaha, But I'm OK with this, she gets her pussy trimmed once a week with my 42" Cub Cadet  hahaha

-- Modified on 4/14/2011 1:12:47 AM

You think too much, the negative opinion isn't important to them as much as the positive $ flow and meeting guys who are not too damn difficult to please. I know this from experience, they all consider me difficult but continue to see me if the $ flow is their hahaha

I agree with this 100%  Sex with Civvies is just too damned boring most times.  Sure there's the initial rush of being with a new person, but most girls just have no idea what they are doing and worst of all have no intention of rectifying the situation.  

so yeah... why would I want to stay with a woman who gives awful head (if any...), has a laundry list of things she "won't" do, and does not even want to have sex that often when I can see a provider?

after reading all of this shit why would anyone that is not married get married?  Geezus!

unless you are trying to raise a big family why in the world would you get married knowing the end game (no sex)??? WTF?!?!?!

Right on. I started after 2 years into my second marriage when lack of sex reared its ugly head. Would not be married now  if not these wonderful ladies.I have meet some teriffic ladies .If I was not married ,I would be interested in pursing them because they really are outstanding people.Thank you ladies.

She said that when a regular client told her that he loves his wife, she didn't believe him and told him so.

Im 33, single, never been married.

If you add up the time "chasing" as well as money spent, on top of stressors involved with a marriage/relationship, why not hobby instead?

Much better return on investment, usually stress free, etc. Im not sure Ill stop when/if I do get hitched.

I agree. Maybe it's rationalization, but I feel like better to hobby safely for the sexual pleasure than to have an affair. Also, some of us are into kinks that the wife might not indulge, whether she's still into sex or not.

Probably true and, when you think about it, it's a pretty crappy deal. Denying a need for sex is pretty much impossible. And you can only jerk off so much. So the guy either goes without a need that comes to him naturally or he risks his marriage.

Dan Savage, who writes a sex advice column always says to go your spouse and get "permission" to fuck around if you don't have an active sexual relationship in your marriage but need one. I'm not sure that would work for most of us. So we're really between a rock and hard place. But I guess I feel like I cannot deny my need for sex, while I can be smart and careful about it. And like others, if on the off chance I should happen to get an STD, there is no way on earth it's going to be sexually transmitted to my wife. If the S in STD is missing, the T is irrelevant.

Like I said earlier in this thread, maybe it's rationalization, but I think the best thing to do is make yourself comfortable with it - as someone else said, with the hand you have been dealt -- be smart and make the best of it. Not make yourself nuts worrying or guilt-tripping about it.

I think all of us who are married hobbyists love our wives. It's just that the relationship has evolved to something far less sexual than it was when we were courting or first married. Unfortunately, we're still guys. Which means we'll be horny until we die.

And there are no calories in anything you eat or drink in an airplane - lol.

I was more referring to stuff like HIV and stufff.....

...other infections, infections in addition to STDs, can also be passed on and carried home, and would think that possibility should also be a concern.  Not sure the ladies always have times for showers and good hygiene when they see multiple clients, and some of those clients may not be that particular about their own hygiene, based on comments I have received from some of the ladies.

...anecdotal information.  Here is a link to a survey that may perhaps shed additional light on your concerns:  http://marriage.about.com/cs/sexualstatistics/a/sexstatistics.htm

agreed,
i'm 35, single, who got into hobbying 5 yrs ago because,

1) I'm always horny
2) I got tired of paying 500euros for taking a girl on dates and only getting a peck on the cheek or mediocre sex when I can spend the same for the time of my life (almost) guaranteed
3) I travel extensively, and enjoy lots of different types of women....variety is the spice of life right?
4) no emotional baggage, wanting relationships, nor female stalkers when i put the long-stroke on her.

so, since I have the cash, ROI/economics has me hobbying.

however,
if i was married and my wife wasn't putting out, I'd still hobby.

I get tested every six months btw.

what is interesting (as a foreigner who hobbies here) is how puritanical USA can be.  to hobby is frowned upon, or illegal

i've hobbied in Senegal, Germany, Holland, Philippines, Singapore, Indonesia, and now currently (living in) Thailand where brothels, AMPs, whatever are winked at but permitted. its bad business when a girl is burning (STD). so they are always tested.  

mms/madames, or whomever don't want their girls messing up the revenue stream. so (like elevator certifications in USA) you can ask for the latest test from mgmt if you so desire.  

either way, constant testing doesn't always certify nothing gets transmitted, thus we hobbyists should get tested ourselves often.

thats why you choose a lady carefully.

My thoughts exactly.  It is a business, and ladies could care less if you are married or not

Like many married men who hobby, I have been married for a long time and my wife has lost interest in sex.  Sex has gone from 3 times a week to maybe 8 times a year because she's too tired, not in the mood, etc.  If not for this hobby, I would have considered divorce a long time ago because sex is important to me.

Remember someone mentioned sometime ago but couldn't find it now, DC area doctor office or clinic special in STD exam.
Thanks.

I think men are wired differently. We can point to some examples of exceptions but thats true in everything. The married clients I see for the most part are *happily* married. They are my friends. I dont look at them like they are bad or "horndogs". Some of them are the best people I have ever met in my life.
Generalizations are pretty silly. Are all escorts on drugs? Man haters? Gay? only care about money?
I think they money part is a common misconception. Because we charge for sex we must not care about anything but money. Professionalism is what makes this a great hobby for the married man. The money is what makes it NOT an affair. The minute you stop paying, you are becoming involved and you might as well meet a woman at starbucks and ask her out...whats the point?

its cheating. Just on a different level. Its sexual cheating. As a woman I find emotional cheating to be far worse, and men who love their families tend to want to save the good stuff for their wives, and keep the P relationship about physical release and friendship.