I have thought about this for some time and wanted to express my thought on this Martin Luther King Jr. Day. As a civil rights leader, he not only brought about justice, but created a new understanding and bond between Americans and persons world wide.
Yet, now in 2006 seeing another as a person, rather than a race has somehow escaped many's capablities. I know many who participate in discrimination are intelligent and simply let fear dictate their actions. One major example of this are providers who do not visit with Black clients.
The first time a gentleman asked me "Do you see Black clients?" I was shocked and replied, "Do you know that I am Black?". The thought of such a practice never entered my mind, and I was appalled to hear that many providers including many Black women regularly turn away gentleman due to race.
I have heard some ladies state their claims as to why they will not see certain types of gentleman, all are folly. Regardless if a gentleman is Black, White, fat, or ugly the main characteristics I believe one should judge on is a gentleman's honesty and respectfulness.
Believing in stereotypes are for those who are in love with their ignorance. I know now better than ever before that stereotypes are BS and no one group fits any mold or preconceived idea. And each time you fall victim and let a stereotype dictate your actions, you re-enforce all stereotypes, including the ones about yourself.
I know that in America almost no one is innocent of discrimination or judging another based on stereotypes, but ignorance and fear have ruled for too long. Ignorance and fear have courageous and honorable young men who believe in our country and freedom fighting and risking their lives in Vietnam...oops I mean Iraq. An ignorance and fear that started at home in Springfield, Topeka, Little Rock, Rockford and Anywhere, USA. I believe in America and love this country and the philosophy it was designed and built on, but too often in history and the present we forget this ideal or manipulate it into something no one can be proud of.
So take time today, tomorrow and many more days to come to look at your neighbor, coworker or even your friends in a new light. One filled with hope instead of fear. One filled with opportunity instead of closed doors. One filled with unity instead of division. Take a moment and look at yourself and find a new way to live up to the ideals you say you believe in and in this new light you will find peace. Be sure to share that peace with others.
I will let providers I am seeing for the first time know that I am black. Once a provider showed up at a hotel I was staying and once she saw that I was black she told me she didn't see black clients. She said my voice didn't sound black over the phone. Anyone would be hard pressed to find anyone of any race that treat people as respectful as I do--so I don't have time for BS that is why I let providers know up front.
I really liked what you said and maybe one day things will be better. Even though we are not where we were, such as seen as a just color or race. Or when we had to use separate everything and better not be seen in public holding hands, etc, with someone of a different color or race, because you could lose your life depending where you were. And there were many other injustices within just the last 100 years. We meaning everyone, should be looked at as just people, not a race or color. Good and bad doesn't have a color, and it's seen in all races. Some of us has made the change in thinking, some have not, but maybe in my childrens' time, or their childrens' time, things will get to that point. Then we will be seen as a great people. Working equality for the good of of us all, not just for one group of people. Sounds impossible, it's not if WE ALL TRY.
I too had that dream Dr King had, and it felt like what I expect heaven to be like.
PS: Treat the ladies/gentlemen you see as the ladies/gentlemen they are, all beautiful and desireable to someone. I might like a little cream in my coffee, but you know what, it still taste good black. Peace and Love to you all.
Well put, Vanica. My only quibble is that ignorance, fear and racism, sadly, are human traits worldwide; Americans don't have a monopoly. The U.S. is one of the places in the world where many people know better, but still sometimes fail at doing better.
In the "real world", racial discrimination is clearly wrong. In a job context, it has always been stupid to refuse to hire or do business with anyone who can make money for you.
BUT: Some things are intimate enough that we are talking about personal taste, not hatred or stupidity. Am I not permitted to prefer brunettes over redheads? And to act on/enforce that preference in my intimate affairs?
Ladies in this hobby should be "free" to pick and choose. I don't want a lady to say no to me because I'm too fat, too bald, or the wrong color, but I do think she should have the right to do so. And we should respect that right.
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