I am relatively new to TER, but I have been involved
with what you guys call "The Hobby" for over 18 years.
I have always been curious to know what makes other guys
see "providers", and if they have the same reasons as myself.

I guess the categories could be generalized into the following:

1) Always been succesful with women, a "stud", but find "pros"  
  exciting.
2) Have always had a girfriend or wife, not a "stud", but is
  just bored or your "SO" doesn't give enough sex.
3) Single, girls may have like you, but you find "pros" easier  
  to deal with.
4) Single, girls have never been attracted to you (at least not
  the ones you are attracted to), and "pros" are your only  
  sex outlet.
   
I would fall into category (4), and I guess I should be thankful
I have a semi-decent job that allows me to afford this. God only
knows what I'd do if I was broke!!

Once again I am just curious. Any feedback would help to satisfy a curiosity I have had for a long time. Thanks

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I don't consider myself a stud, just enjoy the NSA fun from a provider without any other obligations.

Quite simply, it would have to be #2 for me.  

However, I think that some of the guys would likely agree with me.  The single girls want relationships, drama, and require time.  Not a bad thing if you are looking for a relationship.

For me, I travel ALOT for business and am extremely focused on business.   This makes it very difficult to hold a relationship.  I am no troll, AND I am very successful in business.  Never had a problem finding a date, or girlfriend.  I am just tired of being disappointed by the single women who inevitably try to change me, require too much attention, cause drama, or try to get their claws on my wallet.

I am not opposed to the idea of "settling down", but just haven't found a woman that is independent or patient enough with me to allow me to stay focused on my business and the goals (which in the long run would benefit both of us).

Anyways, i am rambling...

I still have needs though, so I find the "hobby" and "pros" much more attractive due to the simplicity of the whole thing.  Simplicity of fun without the strings!

Just my 2 cents.

It's kind of a subset of #3 (and also of #4), but I feel that guys that were once married who had never hobbied until becoming single have a different mindset.

WTF does this mean? Do you understand the definition of "simply"? Because your response is quite complicated and decipherable.

dude...it's sex on demand at the buffet! guess i'll say N/A

i wish regular women at the bar accepted money instead of talking or add me on facebook and going through a process. If you not know wealthy...you can't get a woman flashing her $300, lol.  

outside of college you really can't just talk and get her to come back to the crib or go to their crib. College is like a safe haven so meeting someone and going back the same night is means very little especially when the drinking is much heavier and no one is trying to maintain composure.

you forgot old and ugly with some spare change..

I know this is male rationalzation and an argument I would never win but I have never had an affair.
The hobby has been my means to surpress that temptation . I've never crossed that emotional boundry. Yes, there have been and currently are  Providers I care about and have a personal attachment to but everybody knows the rules.

Once a lady I had been seeing quite a bit suggested on occasion she would like to hook up with me for dinner or a couple drinks and a little romp off the clock. In other words a civi type date.
My response was we could do such a thing but a financial trasaction must take place. I would give her the envelope or SHE could give ME an envelope. But $$$ would definitely change hands.

Plus I've just always liked ladies in the biz . They have been a part of my life since I was 15.

It wasn't always this way but I find girls notice me a lot more these days. I actually believe it is because of this hobby that I'm more confident than I was before.  I'm in a relationship and don't want the complications of a civvie affair.  

Since you ask, I'll put my humility on the shelf for the time it takes to write this.  And I even share it in all due humbleness as beauty/attractiveness is in the eye of the beholder so it's all subjective anyway.  What I am sharing are simply my life experiences.

I've never had a problem getting women.  I quote the line from the movie Wesley Snipes starred in; Sugar Hill......"I don't ask women out, they ask me out."  Just two weeks ago, I saw a provider who noted after our session; "........when you came through the door my first thought is why is he here? He should have no problem attracting ladies....."  And this sentiment has been communicated to me more than a few times.  With that said, I don't see myself as falling into category #1 cause I know guys in category #1 and I've never had it like they got it.  They simply have the "IT" factor/thing and women flock to them.  As a matter of fact, if one of my close buddies knew I was a hobbyist he would laugh his off and ridicule me to know end cause he is in category #1.

If you told me 30 years ago that one day I would literally pay for pussy I would have bet my left nut that that would NOT happen and told you you were addicted to crack to make such a statement.

But as others have noted it's the ease of it all; no drama; NSA; the randomness of it; the selection and variety; and to top it off I've met some wonderful ladies who are good people.  The civi world has become waaaaaay to complicated and filled with so many varying degrees of drama that it's not worth the effort.

I guess I'm officially Old School with this next comment.......IMHO, in the civi world, women are no where near as approachable as they were say 30 + years ago.  There is the illusion of doing the "hook-up" thing when in actuality hooking-up with some one is rife with pitfalls, danger, and simple BSC scenarios resulting from the hook-up.  So why even bother.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Thank you ladies for your service to this community!!!!!!!

Now if I wanted to date a VS model, that is a diferent story of course. Civie relationship is just too much work. I have been living with my SO for 17 years now so sex is getting very boring, and I am not really attracted to her physically anymore. Plus, I always like variety; even in this hobby, I like to see girls in their early 20s (in small doses of course) to women in their early 40s.

Hi XDog, good to see you here!  Personally I would have to say somewhere between (3) and (4).  OK, maybe closer to (4).  Been at it around as long as you have.  It's also helped me meet many more interesting and diverse people than I would have otherwise

Sorry bro...it was a fat finger typo.  The answer is 3

and some bring their wife and girlfriends along. if it wasn't for a layer of clothing between a stripper it would be the same as an escort. Plenty of women understand a man needs lapdance....why not just remove the clothing on both parties?  

sex is sex...doesn't mean you don't love someone less. But people can't separate physical and mental/heart.  Love is cursed by monogamy. Easier said then done and i'm not immune cause I ain't trying to see non other dude hugged up on a lady of mine...yet alone boning each other.

My situation has been similar to Tall's. I don't generally have a problem finding civilian women who are close to my age (mid 40s), but I'm married and don't have much time to invest in traditional dating. I've had some success on Ashley Madison with finding unhappily married ladies to date, but they often come with a risk of exposure and significant drama. I continue to hobby because most of the ladies really seem to enjoy sex and have much better skills and attitude than civilian women. Finally, I like the fact that some pro ladies offer a very wide menu (including many kinky activities) that I can't imagine asking a civilian lady to do.

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