First-timers can be overly concerned about 'good form' usually to their financial detriment.  Showing up at her door without knowing how much money she wants would be almost as dumb as signing over a blank check to someone.  What bona-fide provider (not a scammer) would insist you drive to her area, play phone-tag calling her, hunt and/or pay for a parking place and possibly wait 20 minutes before telling you what she wants until you meet face to face in her space?  It’s possible I suppose, but hardly likely.  Undercover law enforcement (LE) posing as hookers to sting customers want you to talk about money and sex as soon as possible in the conversation, not the other way ‘round.

If the fee is not listed in her ad, call her, mention where you saw her ad with a compliment, say you would like to meet her and ask “What should I bring for your service?” before driving over.  Don't try negotiating; refuse to even if she wants to.  Don’t refer to “sex” at all, but calling money “roses” or “kisses” is not necessary.  Cops, customers, DAs and hookers all know they mean: money.  Bottom line, you need to know her fee upfront by hearing her say how much she wants if it’s not in her ad.  The key is not refusing to talk about money.  Rather, it’s not getting trapped into talking about SEX for money until you’re reasonably sure she isn’t LE.

Once you know her fee, you can spend the time jumping through her hoops of double or triple calling on your way to meet her.  (Maybe that’s actually a good sign as it could indicate she is also concerned about LE.)  Upon meeting, if she doesn’t kiss you and/or grab your crotch during the initial greeting, but instead seems to want you to talk about the details of sex and money while acting sweet and friendly, watch out!  You can walk out at that point, or say you really would like just a massage and see whether she re-directs back to talk about sex and money.  If so, say nothing more, excuse yourself and calmly walk out.

Otherwise, once you are certain she is not LE, you can talk about what you want before handing over the money.  Only negotiate at this point if she wants to.  By the way, after we both were sure neither of us was LE, no one I have met cared about whether the money was in an envelope or even where I put it as long as she could get it.  But if the ad says put your “donation” in an envelope, indulge her, but only after you know she is not LE and she says you’ll get what you want.

I see said the blind man...

Thank you both for the tips esp. Sserviceman for taking the time to share you knowledge.  Being new to this, I'm trying to walk the fine line between being respectful and not getting screwed, well you know...