Is it just me or do some "Johns" assume because we are escorts, because some of our rates are higher than most  that We are obliged to provide anything and everything to anyone.... No... That's not how it works, for me at least. If I am uncomfortable with any certain thing and I tell you no... No means NO! It would be in his best interest to shut the hell up after that. No trying to negotiate, ask a few minutes later lol NO
It's sad when I heard a provider tell me she charges low donations so the men's expectations are low. So what if one guys expectations are high and she ends up cornered in a room with an angry client.... It breaks my heart to even think about the number of women who have probably been raped/abused/or assaulted in this field.  

I am a college student who enjoys exploring her sexual curiosities only with the right suitor. I don't have a sexual life outside of the men I meet through here. I'm a virgin in my friends eyes lol. This is my "sexual outlet" so to speak. I also enjoy the life and comfortability this has provided without having to run home every other week to my parents. I enjoy the independence. I'm doing this because I want to.  

 
But I am still someone's daughter, I am someone's first born,  
Someone's sister. I am just like every other girl and expect to get treated equally.  

On that note, I think I should go to bed.  

 
Just a little tangent....  

 
Good day everyone.  


-- Modified on 4/21/2015 2:30:03 AM

You're going to run into that situation on occasion.  But not every one of us has that mindset.  Some of us enjoy certain activities, DATY, for example.  Not every provider allows for it, that is always her prerogative.  I've been with ladies who might allow one time and the next, politely brush off my attempt if I'm heading that way.  I just kind of go with the flow of things.  I want you to have as memorable of a time as I do

 A guy who tries to negotiate  "special treatment" by offering extra $$$ can be annoying, particularly when he's persistent.  That's quite rude.  You have every right to end the session & not see him again.   But that's way different from "rape/abuse/assault".  You don't help your case by conflating those two things, which differ in an enormous way.  The first case is inconsiderate & rude,  & just punishment = DNS list.  The second is criminal & violent, & just punishment = prison.      

 One thing that I've noticed with several providers: activities that were off limits in session one are suddenly available when she contacts me for session two.  To be fair, that first session can be nerve-wracking, and a provider usually feels more comfortable with a client the second time around.  Your rules & boundaries may be set in stone.  But for some providers, those rules & boundaries are quite flexible.  And some providers will negotiate activities on the fly, during a session.  There's a TER mantra: "everything is negotiable."  I'd qualify that by stating "many things are negotiable".

 One P411 provider in my town was notoriously limited in her activities.  All of her reviews underlined the same thing: gorgeous girl, but no fun.  I experienced pretty much the same thing (I got a bit extra from her since I didn't write reviews).   The last time she contacted me, I told her I was doing the sugar thing.  After explaining to her what that meant (regular hookup every week), her menu flew open in exchange for an arrangement.  Her transformation was miraculous.  I never thought I'd be doing those things with that girl, lol.   The Holy Grail, found.  

  That's what I mean about P4P rules & boundaries. Your rules may be carved in stone, but they're quite fluid for many of your sisters-in-the trade. You need to understand that.  But your first point was a valid one:  a client should accept your "No", once you decline his offer.  A gentleman should respect that.  --z

I charge an hourly rate for time and not any acts. So if we meet a couple times I can almost guarantee the comfort and menu increases. Think about visiting a diner frequently. After awhile a good waittress will remember your face and treat you a lil nicer. I have had some get out their wallets midsession for greek and I do not ever discuss or accept money when the clothes are off. Youre not at a strip club. Side note. If you like GFE try being a little BFE towards us. Chocolate, a card, cute panties, and or any inexpensive thoughtful icebreaker helps things along. Rubbing our feet. Those things will make me purrrrr. Happy Day.

You are ABSOLUTELY right and just because men are hobbyists does not mean they have a license to be immoral slobs.  I consider myself a gentleman and hope my behavior reflects that in everything I do, in my hobbyist world or otherwise.

Sadly, people are people in any walk of life and we would have a difficult time convincing some of the necessity of being fair and decent in any quasi-business transaction.

The difficulty is, we need (both provider and hobbyist) to find a way to articulate our expectations up front and make sure we fully know what is possible during our appointment.

Of course, because we never know if we are dealing with a true provider/hobbyist and not LE, we must be cautions.  Herein lies the difficulty of managing expectation.

I would never care to partake of ANYTHING a provider does not care to offer.  On the other hand, from my perspective, upsell can really put a damper on things.  All is good, to me, when we balance these two factors.

Maybe you can find an acceptable way of protecting yourself and at the same time letting your prospective clients know what is absolutely not on the menu, beforehand.  Your reviews on TER are a good start.

 In business, your philosophy would be a terrible strategy to follow.  Things not initially offered by one side often become available in a negotiation.   You should know this, since you're the one making reference to the "business side" of P4P.  There's always a way to make an offer without being offensive.  I've engaged in a lot of activities with providers that weren't on their menu.  So have many other guys on this board.  

  What angered the OP: her client kept making the same offer, over & over again during the session.  He should have accepted her 'no' the first time.   As I noted in my previous post,  sometimes a provider will contact me for a second appt.  That's an optimal time to make an off-the-menu offer.   In appt #2, she's far more likely to say 'yes' to off-the-menu requests.  She trusts you now.  --z