I know we are in the middle of a discussion about blacklists and I agree with the veterans that it's a bad idea.  However I must emphasize that the bowl has turned into a complete cesspit at least for me in my market.  

Today I got "grab & dashed" for the first time since I joined the bowl in 2016.  

I'm actually not displeased because she looked nothing like her pics and after seeing her I was concerned that Willie would not be able too perform despite his vitamins.

Careful out there guys although there's nothing you can do to avoid a G&D. Silly me I skipped the m&g.

If you don't give her the money first she might dash, but there isn't anything for her to grab. lol

 
If she was as homely as you state, why did you give her money, and money in advance it sounds like, in the first place?

 
Sorry to kick you while you are down, but yes this one definitely sounds like your own fault. If you are going to skip the M&G, which I will confess to doing on occasion as well, it still doesn't mean you are seeing a hooker where she has the right to demand payment in advance, ESPECIALLY if her appearance is not as advertised.  

 
Some of us are having a GREAT time in the bowl, others like yourself seem to be having issue after issue. I think it's time you looked inward to the source of your problems with SB's and quit blaming it on "the bowl" the bowl is just fine TYVM.

I have to disagree there. If you don't produce the cash once you're both in the hotel room the chances of her agreeing to play are well below 50%. Many of them have been burnt that way and all their web sites instruct them not to take their clothes off unless they have the cash in hand.

As for the fact that I gave it to her although she was homely, you have a point there. It wasn't much, 200, and I had already invested in the room so I thought what the hell.

Couldn't disagree more.  MD and me are in the same area, so I wouldn't want to overly generalize.  
OK - so I've got 3 M&G set up the next 3 days - but once again, I just attribute to ebb & flow of the bowl.

Thanks for posting MD - if nothing else if gives us a nice lesson that might come in handy in the future.

I don't know what websites you are referring to but I've never seen advice for SB wannabes that told them to get paid before getting laid.  I know that some have decided to try that route, whether they've been taught that strategy or planned it on their own doesn't matter I guess.  But paying a SB at the end of the date, not the beginning, is truly one of the things that makes it sugar dating, not escorting, and it should be your hard and fast protocol.  I've regretted not following that advice myself and had 2 cash and dash experiences before learned my lesson.

Also, some very honest and sexy young things are still entering the bowl on a regular basis.  My most recent success story was with a lovely 18yo who asked me to pick her up at night, no preliminary m&g, totally enthusiastic about sex, and never even mentioned money at all!  I had to nearly push some $$ on her when I took her back home!  She seemed to hardly care about the money!  So keep searching and you'll hopefully have better luck next time.  But don't give them any $$ upfront!

Hey Sweet, I've seen this on Reddit where there are couple of sugar dating pages.  One of them is always saying "Get the money first honey!".  So I'll defend his statement, but like Gaga why go through with it if she was homely. lol.

I've walked away from a few M&Gs this time around because I knew it just wasn't worth the time or the money to dip the pen in the ink.  I know that will get Gaga going.  But I've become picky and am trying to be discerning. lol. A pussy snob! lol.  If I don't see it going beyond the one time deal then I've come to the realization that I need to walk.

"But paying a SB at the end of the date, not the beginning, is truly one of the things that makes it sugar dating, not escorting, and it should be your hard and fast protocol."

This is how it exactly works for me. As a matter of fact, escorts seemed to always want it up front and SBs ignore it up front. The SBs I've been with seem to like to think of it as an afterthought.

I stand corrected. I've never been on Reddit so maybe that's why my opinion was uninformed. It is discouraging though to learn about that kind of advice being promoted to these impressionable PYTs.  They should just look to us for wisdom and guidance and behave just as we instuct them. Yeah, that's the ticket!

I do so because I think it reduces any anxiety they might have about getting ripped off.  Which should lead to a more enjoyable session for all.  Yes, they can grab and dash, but so far that has not happened to me.  I just consider it one of the minor risks of the biz.

A simple m&g doesn’t protect you from what happened and in the early stages of a relationship, I always have dinner, etc before any Funtime activities so there really is no need to worry about the timing of the payment. If either one of us isn’t necessarily feeling good about it, then she gets a free dinner and can walk away at anytime with no harm, no foul.   The bowl is markedly different than meeting a pro and you should treat it as such.  The nice dinner date tends to set everyone’s feelings at ease. I wouldn’t walk up to an SB meeting her for the first time and immediately take her back to the hotel or anything (not that there’s anything wrong with that and all..to each his own...).  I’ve personally found that if she is more the deer in the headlights and is really scared about getting scammed,  then I will simply tell her upfront that we’ll do an extended dinner date m&g and not expecting anything other than getting to know one another over a nice meal. Worst case is that I’m out a few hundred for a nice meal and back on the recruiting trail...

You're right that the m&g would not have prevented it but I found that the scammers and pros usually do not want to m&g, as was in this case.  In retrospect the g&b was very well executed and the method perfected in advance.

Normally I leave the cash on a dresser in full view and like others have said the girl picks it up on the way out. In this case she pocketed it immediately and went to the toilet, no doubt to count the bills. Then we sat in the room and started the basic chit chat to break the ice when she received a text. She told me it was her mom asking her to text her a photo of the car insurance card she needed for something urgently. This actually sounded legit because it was an expensive newish BMW that she couldn't possibly afford and was obviously her mom's.  Not ever having been g&d'ed before, my alarm bell didn't ring until after she was gone out the room in a flash. I went out and saw the car was gone. Checked SA and found myself blocked.  

Regarding the dinner dates, to be honest I don't do those any more. Coffee or a drink is all the time I'm willing to invest which is enough for me to decide if I want to get with her or not.   I can't begin to count the number of awful, boring dinners I've had with some of these airheads. And at my age, 70, I will not be seen dead in a nice restaurant with a turquoise-haired, tattooed gangsta type. You never know who is going to show up!

Ok fire away...I can take it

Part way into the meeting the girl makes an impassioned statement as to how she was ripped off on a previous meeting by a guy and asks for her money upfront.  Later, with her purse in full sight, she goes outside for a smoke.  Never returns...guy finally figures this out, opens her (rather inexpensive) purse to find it empty!

The last time it happened to me, there were all kinds of red flags that I failed to see - mostly because I'd never seen them before.  

 
She said she was a sugar newbie and wanted to meet a couple of times before she could to ease into intimacy.    She explained that she was in California to get away from an abusive ex in Texas, and that she feared he would follow her to her new location.   Two dinner dates later and she'd asked for and been given a hundred at each. On the 3rd she said she said he'd found her, they had a fight, and she was injured. She showed me where she had stitches on the back of her head after being knocked down on pavement. Now she wanted to get some cash ($700) so she could move again (away from the room she was renting in a trailer park).  

 
Of course, my naïve radar failed to register and I fell into the white knight mode all the way. Took her to an ATM so i could withdraw the rest of $700, then to my place for fun. She was nervous and skittish all the way, and asked to see the cash before she could undress.  I handed it over, and lay down on the bed.  Just then she got a text from "her boss" and said she needed to call him in private to talk about something urgent. I offered to leave the room but she said she'd take it in my living room.  I never heard the front door open.   About 5 minutes later she sent me a text: "Sorry, I just can't do this. Sorry."  

 
I sent back something like, "Ok give me back my money, no problem..."  But of course she was gone and never replied.  I reported her to SA (the 1st and only time I've done that) and they never even bothered to reply to me. Her profile disappeared but I don't know if she blocked me or was banned by SA.  

 
Epilogue:  About 2 years later, she messaged me from a new profile.  I was civil but not interested. She then texted me and asked if there was a way to get together. I was astonished at her audacity.  I replied that the only way I'd ever consider giving her an allowance is if she let me fuck her three times for the cash she stole from me and that the last time I would have to cum bareback in her ass. Then, and only then would I consider talking about a new arrangement.  You can imagine my total lack of surprise when she failed to reply.  

 
So it's cool, Dude, because....  

 

Life is good

 

The Cat