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The Erotic Highway

Vanilla or green?
Scaramouche 204 Reviews 1173 reads
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I've had at least 3 different conversations in recent weeks with women on Seeking who never asked for or discussed money, not sure if they are just too green or shy or interested more in vanilla dating than P4P.
I usually try to get info by asking a generic "what are your expectations?" and this seems to have baffled these girls who respond "what do you mean?" So I don't press. I actually had dinner with one gal who seemed to want to connect but wasn't my type. In each of these cases I have specifically said I'm not interested in a commitment or conventional relationship and in each case they said fine, they didn't want that either. I try not to be crude by saying 'what's your ppm?' with the feeling that some of these gals are offended by the concept.
I do know that Seeking is trying to be more vanilla and think there are some gals who want to hook up and "date" either NSA or FWB and feel like this is a better place to find someone who isn't a loser and will take them to nice places.
I haven't sealed the deal with anyone on this basis yet but interested to hear from any guys who have done so, and what they might do to make things worthwhile (gifts, trips).

lester_prairie72 reads

The impression I got (I'm not active on Seeking nowdays) from the recent focus changes at Seeking is that it is becoming an adult dating site.  

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Scaramouche79 reads

Updated: I determined one of the three was a scammer (I'll have a separate post on this).
For one other I'm reserving judgment, but I think the gal I had dinner with was definitely a vanilla dater.

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sweetman87 reads

At least so far, all the women I've contacted on SA are very well aware that it is not just another dating site, it is a SUGAR dating site.  That said, I had coffee with one PYT recently who, while very aware of the traditional SA arrangement, was not really comfortable identifying as a sex worker.  She's still trying to decide how she would feel about accepting money in an arrangement.  But I haven't met any who were unaware that Seeking is still, in the minds of its users, Seeking Arrangement.

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herbtcat71 reads

I think it's refreshing to see new POT's who are not hyper-focused on the cash, scammer notwithstanding.  

 
I've seen some, not many, SB's who were reluctant to discuss money upfront. One that I recall, was really trying to avoid any type of transactional talk at first. She was also reluctant to agree to BCD until she knew me "better."  My take on her was she really needed cash, but she was deeply troubled with the moral implications of P4P. I don't know if this "trouble" came from religious beliefs, fear of being discovered, or some other personal ethical considerations. Oddly enough, we never got emotionally or intellectually close enough for me to guess. Fortunately, the sex was off the hook while it lasted over the next 8 months. It ended in a rather funny way - at least to me.  I was laid off from my 11-year leadership role at work. I texted her and told her, then asked if we could reschedule our next day's date so I could start a new job search.  She promptly dropped me.  LOL.  

 
As to SA's continuing efforts to rebrand as a pure dating site, I guess we will know they have been successful when a majority POT's never ask about allowance.  (A dream, I know, but still...)  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

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LAERTES72 reads

I did wonder that myself. Their marketing appears now to be more adult dating focused. There are a few profiles in my area where they plainly appear to be looking for love however many are still in the "let's have fun" category.

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herbtcat72 reads

I know that sounds counter-intuitive, but, if there are other yellow flags, it may be an indication of a scammer.  

 
Profiles of a mid-30's, typically Asian women, with the following are suspect:  

 
1. Pics show a well-dressed, upscale, very pretty (almost model-quality) women in a public setting like an upscale restaurant or retail store
2. She's a "business owner" of an unspecified nature  
3. She travels frequently between places like Hong Kong, NY and LA
4. She says she's looking for a real connection that will lead to a LTR and eventually marriage.  

 
These are the classic profile of the recently discussed "pig butcher" scammers (Hint: You are the pig!).   "She's" playing a long game, starting with casual friendship offers, deflecting discussions about sex, and eventually mentioning her "Uncle" that's been successful trading crypto.   From there "she" will try to lure you into letting her or her "uncle" give you investment advice.  And then the trap has been sprung and you just pissed away $20k, $50 or much more in a scam.  

 
So, the cute, naive 19-year old that's too shy to ask for PPM: potential unicorn. But the 34-ish sophisticated, but lonely businesswomen looking for her soul mate on a Sugar site: nope.  The ref's going to flag that play!  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

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