I said in another thread I'd post how this weekend went.  Over the last few months my life in the sugar world changed quite a bit.  Went from having a few girls that I was seeing on a regular basis to 0 then back to 1.

My birthday last month was supposed to be with GCG, will not be calling her that anymore.  For those who haven't seen previous posts, Green Card Girl lives in Tijuana.  She has a work Visa so she can cross and we had been dating in San Diego on a regular basis.  She made it clear that boyfriend/girlfriend was only for when you are in love.  So we were just dating.  Although she did want us to be exclusive, doesn't want to catch anything.

Her mom had a really bad car accident last month so we stopped seeing each other.  I took it as a clue she got a better offer.  I'm pretty sure my guess was wrong and she actually was taking care of her mom.  We kept texting and I went on vacation by myself.  The other SBs I had basically forgot about my bday which was annoying because they sure as hell would not let me forget there's.  For various reasons I stopped seeing any of them as well.

So a few weeks no SBs.  Did a little normal dating and found women there are still just as flaky and crazy.  So, she reaches back out and tells me she can get away for a date on a Saturday.  I drive down, we go to a sports bar with amazing food and drinks.  Watch some MMA and have a great time in the hotel after.  She tells me she really appreciates how I was not judgemental.  She is very close to her mom and her other siblings are not helping out at all.  So she's been working, working over time to pay mom's bills, and staying with her.  She said the allowance really helps since her savings was wiped out paying for medical care for mom.  No insurance in Mexico.

I was expecting an ask for a raise, it did not come.  So, we see each other the following weekend.  Go to the same bar, we like it a lot.  She says in Mexico you have to formally ask for someone to be your girlfriend.  You can't do it over text.  Remembering she wants an I love you with that, I filed it.  Then she said it again and again.  I smiled and said, I have an idea of what to do.  Then she said it again, basically saying ask me now.  I told her I would plan something special for us to ask you.  She smiled and liked that.  At the end of the night, she kissed me and said "I love you".  then got out smiling and walked back to the border crossing.

So, this weekend.  I took her to Coronado (Island connected to San Diego by bridge).  It's a gorgeous area.  We walked around and I asked her in Spanish.  She smiled and said yes.  We took pics together and ate at an Italian place on the Island.  Great night.

What does having a SB/girlfriend mean?  For me, it's consistency.  Saturday night is our date night.  No "are you free this day?"  It's Saturday night.  Talk, text and pics daily.  She knows her allowance is $500 a week.  I know I'm seeing a hot, young woman I enjoy talking to and have great sex with every weekend.  So, for now, I'm not looking for an additional SB.  Weekly dates are good for me.  If I'm dying to get laid mid week I can see an escort.  In the past, I've gone to signing a lease and paying for the apartment.  I'm not doing that in Tijuana.  Not even sure if I can sign a Mexican lease.  

Sounds like you have a unique situation, and one that is working for both of you.  There's no "right way" to do sugar dating.  What works for you and her is what's right for you both.  And her allowance of $500/week is more than the average household income in Mexico, so there's no doubt she appreciates that.  I hope you get to enjoy this arrangement for a long time.

Like Papa Sweet said: "There's no "right way" to do sugar dating." But there sure are plenty of wrong ways.  This board is full of "wrong way" stories. So it's delightful to see you land in a very good place for you and your SB. Well done.  

 
And you also showed the value of never burning bridges. You could have challenged her story about her mother (glad Mom is doing better BTW) but instead you handled it with compassion and grace with no guarantee it would work out.  

 
It's also useful to see how (perhaps) the non-US culture of your SB played positive a role here. When you tested the local waters for civilian dates, you found the same level of entitlement (read Feminism?) that is keeping Social Media ablaze with Man-hating posts. When I have sugared outside the US, I almost always find women (especially in SE Asia) to be comfortable with, or even preferring, arrangements and fully engaged in the relationship as it is.  (Note: I'm not a "manosphere" devotee, but I do think there is something there to consider. Perhaps the stuff of some future discussions...?)  

 
Perhaps the bottom line here can be found in the concept of respect. You respect your GCG, and she respects you.   That makes it easy to find the win-win each of you want.

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

So happy to hear your current SR with your Mexican lady is strengthening. It's working for both of you and that's what counts. When it works it's a win-win for both partners. You've given her what sounds like much needed and greatly appreciated emotional and financial support to help her through her difficult time. I believe that is the essence of what we should provide for our SB's.  

 
There are many downsides and hassles to dating, whether it's sugar dating or plain vanilla. I too have tired of dealing with flakes and phonies. So few of women I've met both in person and online are really sincere. Even with upgrading to Diamond and being on two services for well over two years running I've found only a few keepers out of hundreds of what I thought were promising potential partners.  

 
There are no easy answers. It requires a lot of diligence, grace and patience to keep good quality people in your life. Thank you for sharing your experiences with us, Netnoy. We all learn from one another and are here to provide support and a sympathetic ear as we navigate through the perils and pleasures of this exciting though often frustrating dynamic.  

Living in San Diego  it's not uncommon and generally much more realistic.  I have a beautiful 23 yo that grew up in TJ but lives in Chula Vista.   We only do 300 PPM. She just wants consistentcy. With my 2 primary SBs gone she will be moving up to the A list.