Ok - some background first  

I was in a 3 month sugar relationship with a super attractive thin tall 28yo single white girl - I was paying her monthly rent and occasional help but overall it was great sex twice a week at her place and comfortably within my budget - I was happy at my good fortune. She was punctual, never made excuses, spent a lot of time w me and I became a decent part of her life  

We had a little spat over text one time and then she cut off all contact. I tried to reach out to her several times but she ghosted me completely. I moved on to others on ppm but still missed her - the current landscape on seeking in my area is pathetic w entitled wannabes who aren’t as attractive as she was

Anyways fast forward - 2 wks ago she reached out after a gap of 3 months and wanted to get together- I was like meh but then decided to invite her to a few drinks and a bite to eat. She told me she got involved w a rich guy who was a bad influence on her (drugs partying hard etc) and she had to break it off w her and now is recovering. She hinted she wants to get together again w me.

Then a few days later I find out (she texted me) that she had checked into a rehab for substance abuse (from the time spent w the other guy).  

Two weeks go by after our reunion drinks. Then she calls me today and says she will be staying at rehab for two more weeks and then will return back to her apartment (which is like 5 miles from my house)  

She wants me to help her partially w the rent coming due next week (it’s a low 1xxx sum she is asking for). I know her landlord personally so it’s not a scam I can directly pay him. But thing is this - I won’t  be seeing her for two more weeks and the way she ghosted me before left a bad taste in my mouth  

Here is the kicker — I will probably not find someone as solid as her on seeking (for what I was offering her) and maybe I should assume I should be ready to lose this payment if she decides to bail on me again with the chance that if she is being honest, I will probably experience the best makeup sex I’ve ever had.  

What would you guys do in my situation? I can always say no to her upfront $ request but then I will probably lose her permanently. Should I take this leap of faith and help her out ?

From your reviews, you're in CA which makes me think of Rockford Files. Whenever he needed to get some info, he used his portable printer to make a phony business card. "Sugar Real Estate, Inc. ; Oxnard, CA ; John Doe, Real Estate Agent."  
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Because I can be skeptical at times, I'd ask the landlord if she has been around or not. "Not for a while. I think she's in rehab." or "Yeah, I saw her the other day and helped her and her boyfriend bring in the groceries. Just between you and me, sometimes she falls behind on the rent but she pays me with sex ... and she is great."
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Or, print "Oxnard Medical Center ; Oxnard, CA ; James Rockford, M.D." Go to the rehab (do you know which one?) and ask to speak to or leave a message for [her name]. "I'm sorry, Doctor. She checked out last month."  
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Or maybe you can confirm parts of her story some other way.

I sense you still have a serious crush on her, so go for it.

 
As the saying goes:   (I'm into saying today.)   It's better to regret something you have done than to regret something you haven't done.

 
By the way, I always go back to them and haven't done too badly in most cases, so play the long odds.

I once visited a friend in the hospital who just had their gall bladder out.    I was dressed in a suit and a large fancy overcoat.   The nurse assumed I was her doctor, so asked me if I had any special instructions for the patient.   I said yes, be sure she gets an ice cream sundae every hour on the hour.   My friend burst into laughter which, of course, made her incision hurt like hell, so she made me leave.

 
Comedy can be cruel.

 
Here's another take on it that one of my favorites:

Only you can decide if this is worth it to you. We don't know your budget, your situation, what you can afford to lose or how much this gal means to you.
The optimistic outlook: she appreciates you more and gives you the best-ever sex and lots more fun for a long time.
The other side: she left you for another dude who outbid you and got into drugs, and she may do it again.
Toss a coin....

-- Modified on 5/28/2023 7:23:31 PM

Imp and Fish are having a bit of fun here... which I appreciate.  It's important to keep a sense of humor in the Sugar Bowl.  If you get too serious about these decisions, you will end up chasing a girl, your money, or both right down the drain.

 
As to how to evaluate your options, I'll try to lay out what I see are the relevant considerations:  

 
1. Truth: People lie. SB's lie, SD's lie, family lies, coworkers lie, politician lie, clergy lie.  It's built into our psychology - we lie - sometimes.  So don't waste too much time trying to prove she told you the truth. She told you the "truth" she wanted you to have, so take her at face value and go from there. If you HAVE to prove she's not lying, then you already know you're done with her.  

 
2. Drug abuse sucks. It ruins the lives of anyone it touches. Those that can escape that life deserve the love and support of anyone who can give it - until/unless they get trapped again.  

 
3. There are no guarantees in the Sugar Bowl - and all arrangements end.  Always.  Enjoy it while it lasts, try not to end a good arrangement if you can do so with a reasonable amount of effort, but know that like the entropy of the universe, it will end at some point.  

 
4. What are your real risks of saying yes?  
- She may still be a drug addict. You will end up tossing a few months' allowance (plus a bit more) out the window before you find out. So, is losing another $1k-5k over the next 2-3 months a serious hit to your disposable cash?  
- She may still be seeing the "rich dude."  You've probably already lived through that reality as she was likely seeing him before your "text spat." Let's double down on this: she was, or at least might have been seeing other SD's as well.  If you were only seeing her 2 times a week, that leaves her up to 5 days a week to see other SD's (or a BF, or GF, or?).  Never assume your SB is monogamous, unless you have specifically agreed to be, AND you are providing enough allowance that she has no need to get allowance from anyone else (I mean like at least $10k a month or more). Even then...    
- This will become a recurring pattern. That may be a positive or a negative, depending on your point of view.  If you like the idea of having her in your rotation for 3 out of 5 months and having some other SB(s) in your rotation to fill the gaps, this could work well as you can rotate your pussy as you rotate your favorite restaurants (steak, then sushi, then French, etc.). Or if you want just one (near) perfect SB at a time, you will need to reevaluate this again and again...  

 
5. What are your risks of saying no?  
- You start your search anew. Like Papa Sweet (sweetman) recommends, you can/should always (or at least frequently) be looking at new and existing profiles to keep a few SB's on deck. Some, like Pappa Sweet and myself, keep an active rotation of SB's at all times. Some are on what I call my A-list: actively seeing on a regular schedule, some on my B-list:  usually available on short notice as a back-up when an A-list is not available or cancels, or they reach out to me when they want to/they are in town/their current SD bails, or they just want some dick (read: new shoes).  
- You will have to pay more for the next SB.  No, you won't - if you learn (or maintain) good negotiating skills and work through enough profiles over time.  Still costs for related expenses like dining out, gifts, rent/hotel etc., will all eventually increase - so this risk is not specific to your lost SB.  

 
Bottom line: Based on your post, it sounds like resuming the allowance with her is not a major block in going forward; you can afford to drop the $1xxx on her without jeopardizing your financial future. She's young, and young people make mistakes. That's how they (and we) learn about life and develop what many SB's appreciate about their SD (after the cash): Wisdom. You can be wise enough to allow her to recover from a big mistake with grace, and you can be wise enough to know how much you will appreciate banging her 2x a week.  

 

Life is good

 
The Cat

I have confirmed it - so definitely not scamming me w an excuse it seems.  

Thanks for all the advice. I think I am leaning towards giving it a shot just because if I come through at a stressful time like this for her, very possible that she will go above and beyond

But mentally I am prepared to write off that amount in case she flakes on me after returning from rehab in two weeks

Yeah I agree w what you outlined - thanks hcat

To clarify - I’ve been to her apartment, know her landlord  and also know that she has not been on seeking trying to rack up other SDs during the gap - the “rich druggy dude” was exclusive  w her as he showered her with more money than I ever did. Had it not been for the fallout between the two of them I doubt she would have come back to me  

She could be tugging at my heartstrings for all i know - but your point about I will find someone else w negotiation - yes I did go on seeking again but the pickings are slim - especially when I compare how hot she was and similar looking pots on seeking I will probably have to shell out 1.5x or so for the same level of meet frequency when  I include expenses on hotels etc

Yes you can get someone, anyone but if you want a certain level of sophistication (she is someone you can take to any upscale place or have meet your friends) and hotness, it is really a slog

Agree, it is a coin toss - she already showed her colors once  

In her favor, she did voluntarily go into rehab so shows some level of personal awareness and progress - and I will have to rely on having some faith in that

Actually, unlikely she will flake.  More likely she will become dependent on you.  Take care!

Thanks - if that does happen, I wouldn’t mind as the sex was unbelievable - I could honestly see her everyday if I didn’t have other obligations and time constraints

Circle back in 2 - 4 weeks with an update.

...and I wonder how this is playing out?  Sorry for weighing in late on this thread, I've been fighting off a nasty case of strep throat.  But much of the situation resonates with me.  During the pandemic I was trying to be exclusive with one unbelievably hot, young SB.  The sex was off the charts.  She was not into drugs, as your girl became.  But she was lying to me about a BF situation that she was totally addicted to, and that was toxic for her.  She finally revealed that he hit her, and was emotionally abusive.  So when she ghosted me and moved away to live with him, I was really hurt.  It left a really bitter taste in my mouth and in my heart.  But I know I'd take her back in a hot minute if given the chance.  I suspect you will do the same, at least take a chance on her again.  But take Herb's flawless advice:  chat up some others and get at least one more arrangement going.  There's nothing like alternative pussy to put the one that got away into perspective.  

Thx for all the advice  

Update for sweetman and others - it did not end up working out  

She supposedly got out of the rehab center early as she relapsed. I offered to see her at her place again and she kept making one excuse or the other. I finally gave up. Last she said she was leaving town permanently to be with her parents but who knows  

I am done w her mind games. Sex w her was good but I was able to reconnect w another ex pot SB who comes decently close in looks and appeal but w a lot less drama, although it will cost me a bit more

@ am2014 jumping late into the thread. Usually it's not a good sign of getting ghosted. She'll do it again even if it did "work out" a second time. She did you a favor. You'll get attached again and she'll ghost you once she gets her "BBD
" (bigger and better deal).

Couldn’t agree more  

In general, I am taking a break for now until the economy softens a bit (incentivizing more women to enter) or we get a new crop in the fall w college back open. I do have a part timer SB that I can see maybe like once or twice a month depending on her schedule.  

Getting initial meetups (m&g) is not a problem at all for me, just that I Cannot accept these outrageous ppm demands now for mediocre women and also don’t want to lower my standards.

@am2014

Yeah, chipmunk your money for another day. There are always more SBs in the pipeline. Definitely don't pay for outrageous ppm for subpar SBs! Happy Hunting!