Just had a M&G with a tasty 22-year old who joined in March. She's a college student, Los Angeles native and recently quit her job as a bottle service girl at LA Downtown clubs.
I discuss that at the same time that I discuss the allowance. For me, that is the time to say what I´m expecting (along BB is for her to be shaved) along with finding out what her expectations are.
Her refusal definitely kills the arrangement for me. I haven´t kept stats, but I have had times where we did not reach an agrement because of that. I respect that, and simply tell her that if she changes her mind, we should definitely talk again.
My best experience was with a lady who wanted covered for the first BCD, but we could be BB for later dates, and I agreed (mainly because we seemed to have such a good chemestry on our initial meeting). Well, when the time comes and we are on our BCD, I eat her out for a long time (because I like doing that). My plan was to tease her a little bit rubbing BB against her slit before stopping and putting on the rubber, but as I´m rubbing against her slit, she just tells me to forget it and to just stick it in. I did not need to be told twice.
I guess I'm going to have to speak up for the safe drivers here. For me the risk is not worth the reward.
We are not monogamous and don't expect our partners to be. Even with testing, you have a lag time with STDS, and you can be clean one day and dirty the next. I will use a cover for everything except oral (where the risk seems limited) and I'm fine with the results.
I completely agree with you and, as herbcat indicated, it "is a VERY personal and mutual decision". So, if the lady is not comfortable with that condition, I respect that and nothing happens. That is the point of an initial meeting: to talk and set expectations and conditions for a possible arrangement. The time to bring up BB is certainly not seconds before you are going to put it in.
I certainly also don´t advocate that every arragement for everyone needs to be BB. But, BB is important to me and I was just sharing my experience.
If someone is not comfortable with BB, they certainly should not do it. It is the same for me: if the lady estipulated to me the use of a controlled substance during the BCD, we would not have an aggrement even if she was a 11/10, accepted all my conditions, and bought her 10/10 female friend to join... Someone else may accept that condition and I don´t have a problem with that but it would be a deal breaker for me.
I always talk with new SBs about health and safety. I'm surprised by the number of young women I encounter who tell me that they are not on any form of birth control and therefore insist on using condoms all the time. They seem less concerned about STIs than they are about pregnancy. I don't mind using condoms, so no BB is no deal breaker for me. I just assume it's the price of admission.
I have one SB at present with whom I go BB. She and I have agreed that we will be exclusively BB with each other and no one else. And if either of us does go BB with a different partner we'll inform each other. So far this has worked well. She did go BB with someone else, told me, and we used condoms for a while until she got retested.
The girls on the site, particularly the ones you meet, aren't innocent angels. 99% of the time they're saying they aren't on BC because they don't want to go BB.
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