Would greatly appreciate your advice asap because time is of the essence! This goes back to my earlier post about flying a SB in to town. So long story short, lately I feel that the magic has dwindled via texting. It's been 3 weeks since I've seen her and she is suppose to be flying in tomorrow. I notice she doesn't sound as excited when texting me nor does she sext me anymore. I think I might've messed up by asking her if she is still seeing her ex bf. Last week. I couldn't help myself. She mentioned how sad he made her a couple of times. So I was curious. Her response was "Why? you still have sex with your wife? it is the same question I never lie for you I was falling in love to him..Now I don't know what I ll do ..the thing that I have sure is that I ll never stop more my life for someone .. He no want nothing with me.. this is sad for me I m feel sad but okay.."
My question is should I cancel on her and burn the bridge or just take a blind leap of faith like I did initially with her. I just have this gut feeling that if we saw each other. that things won't be the same as it was 3 weeks ago. She has been short with me via text lately and doesn't seem as eager as she once was. It's nothing rational I can explain. Just a gut feeling. I don't care about losing cost on the plane ticket and I can still use the hotel for a POT SB.
If she gives you the cold shoulder treatment you can always leave her at the hotel with cabfare back to the airport. Personally, I'd see it through at this stage considering the answer she gave you. but that's just me.
She is seeking a no-judgment space with you. Asking her who she is still seeing/fucking has a note of condemnation. Don't ask her anything personal about relationships, loves, or problems. Just be focused on her pleasure/fun and be totally appreciative of her attention on you.
IF she volunteers info, do not have an opinion! Don't "should on her!" (You should do this. Or you should do that.) Just listen and be empathetic. Try to understand how she feels. "Wow, that must have been a difficult time for you. So sorry you had to go through that".
Then fuck her brains out and tell her she's smart, tough and beautiful.
did u think that asking about her ex boyfriend was appropriate or would have a positive outcome? If she is, it's NONE of your business. The outcome is EXACTLY what I would have expected. You screwed up and this "relationship" is toast - move on and learn from it.
I think talking about other lovers past and present is a perfectly acceptable and really fun thing to do with your SB. I have one 19yo SB who talks incessantly about her sexual exploits and I love it. I've had similar conversations with several of them. Yes, a few are not willing to be open about it, but then I shut up. No problem. But it's never been a deal breaker to ask about their past loves and lovers or to offer to tell them about mine.
As for your current situation, women are moody. Yeah, big news flash I know. But they are! She's not in a bouncy jolly smiley mood right now. So have your date and cheer her up! Or let her cry on your shoulder if that's what she needs. And fuck her brains out which always helps! Her mood will pass and you will be the one who was kind and helpful and understanding when she felt low.
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