I've had a few decent successes in the past 3 months but they are few and far between. The main issue other than no response at all on Seeking when I reach out, is that the ones who do act interested flake out. Once we go to offline text they ghost after an exchange of a few texts or so. I'm trying to figure out what the reason for this is. This has happened to me so many times I'm wondering what the game is. Has anyone else run into this and have any ideas? My guess is they just want to verify my phone number to use for sending scam texts later from another number or quite possibly get my photos to use to create fake profiles of men to scam women? I can understand a certain amount of real women might not respond or quit responding if they are toe-dippers or tire kickers, but the amount of POTS that have ghosted are numbering in the hundreds for me. Any guesses on what the scam/reason is? There's been no discussion of PPM or allowance in these ghostings, the ghost usually happens right after several text exchanges offline or right after we exchange messages on the site. I did post about this issue in the past in this forum but didn't get many replies on here, thought I'd try again and see if any of you have any insights on this.      

-- Modified on 12/13/2024 3:24:56 AM

I'd guess in many cases they found someone they want to pursue so they drop other threads.

I would be the most famous author in the world from the self help book for men I would write.

You fix this through volume.  Women flake all the time.  They get busy, stressed, depressed, find a SD, find a boyfriend, family issues, etc.  who knows?  I send a final hail Mary "hope everything is great, lmk when you want to meet."

It may be interesting to observe over the next several months if this behavior reduces with the new validation process in place.  

 
I suppose one would need to make a point of only interacting with SB profiles that are marked as selfie verified, then track the funnel:  
1. Contact  
2. Reply
3. Contact offline
4. Schedule M&G or 1st date
5. M&G completes
6. BCD completes.  

 
Right now, the OP is seeing huge drop off between steps 3 and 5, and I suggest that is consistent for most of us.  

 
 Who wants to be our official spreadsheet monkey to track this? LOL  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

I'm sensing there's an actual methodology/reason for it always happening the same exact way: Once we start texting offline, we have a few cordial exchanges such as 'how is your day' 'I'm working but will text later' or whatever, and then 'she' ghosts. Hundreds of these. It's uncanny and I don't think we can chalk it up to they being busy or depressed or finding someone else. Granted, those are valid reasons for it happening and for it to happen often, but not in the numbers I'm seeing. Has anyone else noticed this or is it just me? Netnoy, I agree it's a volume game but what I am getting at is asking if anyone gets the impression it's some kind of scam? Herb, I sure hope Seeking can stem the tide in some way removing or screening out scammers but as you point out it's complicated and its level of effectiveness is very much in question.  

I have not noticed the unusual trend you are describing.  Of course, some text exchanges go nowhere, or just fizzle out.  But you describing a repeating pattern that's very specific and consistent.  I haven't seen that myself.  What I have noticed, often enough to wonder wtf, is a breakdown in communication between Herb's steps #2 and #3.  We make contact, we exchange some replies, and then her profile is gone, unavailable, or she blocked me.  Sometimes this happens after Step #1!  She favorites me and I never even get a chance to say hi.  Why would a SB favorite someone and then block them before they reply?  Seems very odd to me, but it's happened often enough.  Sorry I can't shed more light on your specific question.

Im on SB not SA. Got kicked off because a chicken reported me after zi canceled a date because she added last minute gas and babysitting money.  But back to subject. On SB we have to pay for pics and messages.  I think the likes are from bot accounts by management to get us to burn our paid for credits

I hang out on SB because I always have some credits in reserve.  I really haven't detected a bot problem.  I get two or three favorites/messages a day from chicks.  I think most of them are real -- because they aren't all runway model looks.  There could be bots, of course, but so far after several years online there, I haven't picked up an obvious pattern.

From my observations, SB's the reasons they ghost include:
1.  SB's have a set $ amount in mind and if you don't offer that they don't even counter, they just ghost.
2. SB's want to meet now, if you give them an excuse, say wait for the weekend, they lose interest.
3. SB's realize fucking random, mostly gross people who lie about everything, is not for them.

I just had a young lady message yesterday.  Asked if I wanted to meet so I clarified if it's for BCD fun. She said yes. Switch to text. She texts me with a hey how are you. Then ghost. I think the idea of actually fucking an old guy like me freaked her out.

"She" replies - Switch to text -then ghosts  - This is the pattern I've mentioned in previous posts. While it could be just a tire kicker-game player-mildly curious, I think most are just trying to get your phone number to use to try to scam you later.

 
Don't be surprised if you get a text from an unknown number in a day or two with some cryptic message like " I found you in my address book but don't have your name," "do you remember me?" etc.   These are Asian pig butcher schemes most likely.

When I see a profile that looks risky (yellow flags, reverse image=0 hits, minimal text, etc.), I will only provide my Google Voice number. I may even suggest that we text on WhatsApp with that number.  

 
If "she" has WhatsApp, that's another yellow flag as that App is most popular outside the US, especially in Asia.  

 
If she ghosts and then feeds my burner number to a phone scam operation, those "do you remember me" messages will pop up on WhatsApp or my Google Voice app.  Since I only use that number for these cases, any incoming messages from unknown senders are 100% scammers and get blocked - eventually.  

 
Why eventually? Because I have enough free time on my hands to allow me to fuck with the scammer for a while. It's hella fun for me and I like to think I am wasting their time long enough to prevent someone else from being scammed for a while.  I've had "conversations" that span over 3-5 days. Of course, I never provide any real data, I just keep feeding them useless questions and outrageous responses.  

 
Example:  
Scammer: "Do you remember me?"
Herbtcat:  "I think so... did we hook up last week in Vegas?"  
S: "Aren't you my friend Doris?
H: "Doris... Oh yeah! Best BJ ever. Couldn't believe that skank took on 4 guys. What a night! Are you DTF today?"  
S:  "Wait. I think I may have the number wrong. Sorry to bother you."  
H: "Ok"
S: "You seem like a decent man. Can I ask your name?"  
H: "Can you send me a pic? I need to see tits!"
S: "That isn't very nice."  
H: "Yeah... my bad. I already have a pic of Doris. Tell her I said HI!"

 
And so on until they just fade away.  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

I lol'd reading that!

Ih, shit! Now you made it so I want to get in contact with the scammers, just to fuck with them.