I am extremely green here, but learning a lot from you all. I know they are called sugar babies for a reason, but is it possible for a MILF to also be a SB?  My concern about them is that I believe most of them are, indeed, Mothers. That feels messy and overcomplicated to get involved in. On the pro side is a more experienced, perhaps more adventurous woman instead of a dingy flighty teenager. Does anyone have experience with a 30’s SB?

Secondly, as I’m about to do a M&G with my first SB candidate, what’s the first red flag that you typically see?  

Thanks for your wise counsel, both in the past and now.  

Never tried anyone in their 40s.  Not that I didn't message, just nothing came of it.  There are the occasional hottie that old that I'd try out.

I've had a few in their 30s.  One was an absolute nightmare, stole from me, cheated and I found out after two years, was married.  Others were just either very flaky or demanding an allowance that is far higher than they are worth because they had racked up more debt and bills.

Hi RH and welcome to the fray!  I hope your first foray into the Sugar Bowl is a great one!  I've had some excellent results with mothers.  They can be more focused on what really matters.  A nice reliable man to fuck and give her $ome $ugar who does not want to mess with her life can be perfect for her.  That's how it was with my last one, she was just 24 when we met, 26 when it ended.  The older ones, in my experience are weirder than the young ones!  I had a 36yo who had many restrictions, swore I was her only one when I knew for certain she was seeing others, and just overall weird.  As for red flags, if she asks you for $ at the last minute, before you meetup, be reeeeal careful!  Never give $ or send $ in advance.  If that's a deal breaker for her, you just dodged a bullet, move on and be glad.

Today I was texting with a potential SB.  She assumed that I was an inexperienced SD and said that it was mandated by the SD site that there be a paid for meet and greet, quoting a high price! I just blocked her. Be careful for all kinds of crazy scams.

Welcome RH to both "The Sugar Bowl" and 'The Erotic Highway"  

You'll find lots of support, friends and great past posts here, as well as golden advice.  

I'm pretty new to the bowl, about a year, but personally, I've found the best and worst of SB's at many different ages, and can't really say age had much to do with it. I can say I've had the actual best experiences with older women, age 39-49, and a few as old as 59. I've not yet had much luck actually sugaring with any girls younger than 26. I can say my 26 year old was/continues to be as wonderful of an experience as I had with my oldest, 59.  

It really gets down to finding someone who is reliable, honest and fun to be around, someone you genuinely like spending time with and want to be around, and vice versa. This takes a lot of time, vetting, going on many M&G's, and being patient. It's exhausting dealing with all the flakes, phonies, fakers and takers on SA. As far as red flags, for me it's when the lady is too intent or focused on money, on trying to 'negotiate' the 'best deal.' The best SB's for me don't emphasize the money part as much as they want the chemistry and relationship to take center stage. If you find a good one, treat her well and compensate her well. Show her your appreciation in every way you can. If she is a good one, she'll return the attention with her own.  

NEVER pay for a platonic M&G, vet carefully and take your time. Don't fall in love, don't get too attached. These relationships are often temporary and can be heartbreaking after you've grown close and the other decides to leave, sometimes they even ghost you for no reason. Live in the moment of now.  

Feel free to visit here often for advice from the old pros.  

You all are awesome. Than you, Brothers!  You’ve already saved me from a ton of missteps that would have been painful lessons to learn. I have no doubt that I’ll screw up some, anyway, but you’ve saved me from falling prey to the newbie tricks. You’re a great group of guys!!!

My very first contact wanted $350 for the M&G. She claimed that she would apply it to our first bcd session if we went forward. Thanks for making it SO obvious to say NO!!!

Keep in mind that one salient fact about legit SBs is that they NEVER ask for $ in advance.  Never! I have had the pleasure of dating many wonderful SBs in my career as a daddy so far.  It always goes like this:  DM on SA for a while, then text for a while, then meet for lunch one time, then meet BCD for a mutually satisfying encounter including $ome $ugar for her, hopefully the first of many.  Never any requests for $ in advance to prove you are serious or to buy her some gas or to pay her phone bill or to pay the babysitter so she can come to you or any of the other myriad of excuses/reasons they will give you.  And the corollary to this truism is that every time you do send $ in advance (yeah I was foolish enough to do this in the past)  they never show up!  NEVER!  They take the $ and disappear.  So any SB who asks for $ in advance is waving a huge red flag in your face, advertising loudly that she is not legit.

-- Modified on 8/11/2024 8:08:51 AM

I've never understood SDs who are hooked into sending money in advance. Even when I was a wet-behind-the-ears sugar rookie back in the day and was asked for car money or babysitting money or whatever in advance I never fell for it. Nobody had to tell me it was a bad idea. And it's not like I was particularly smart either. Every time I would say, "I'll be happy to reimburse you when we meet..." they were gone in a heartbeat! P.T. Barnum was right...although he never actually said there is a sucker born every  minute.

Sometimes, one does not want to use 'absolutes' when describing SB behavior, but after having been there (SB/SD world) for a number of years, one absolute is that a real girl (one that will last) will never request money up front.  And, even the poor creatures who seriously need it, generally will not evolve into the type of woman you will enjoy spending serious time with.