Your bad experiences are quite unfortunate, and not at all representative of my own or other enthusiastic SDs here on this board. Please go back and read lots of past posts, and I think you'll see that lots of us with varying locations, ages, preferences, have found sugar dating in general and SA in particular to be a truly wonderful way to meet lovely, sexy women who enjoy sexual relationships with their SDs.
I've been sugar dating since 2014. I NEVER suspend my membership. The fee for being on SA is simply the price of admission and I'm willing to pay it. I think a continuous presence on the site has been very rewarding for me. Others may disagree. I know others here have had success jumping in and out.
Everyone who uses SA will run into his share of scammers. But I have never once found a middle aged woman posing as a young one. The closest I came to that scenario was a woman claiming to be 26 who was actually 36. but she had an amazing body and could easily have let me keep thinking she was 26! And she was a great fuck, so no worries! And had I encountered what you report, it certainly would not have taken months to figure it out. I would have found out within a week or two from our initial DM contact when we meet for coffee. If she refuses to meet within a couple weeks, she's not serious and I move on.
That said, I have indeed encountered a few who are much heavier than their pictures would suggest. Nowadays, if they don't post at least one very well lit, full length picture, with close fitting clothing, I ask them to send me one before we meet.
There are many reasons why using SA is NOT a no brainer to the same extent that dating escorts is. You need to develop some real sugar dating skills. If the effort is not worth it to you, keep dating escorts, hey, they are great! But the kind of intimacy I have experienced with sugar babies is off the charts when compared to escorts. No comparison. I will probably never go back to escorts. And the cost of sugar dating, on the basis of cost per hour of companionship, for me and many others, is a fraction of the cost of dating escorts. Even including the $948 per year to maintain my profile on SA.