The Erotic Highway

Re: Too risky here in CA
netnoy 55 Reviews 466 reads
posted
1 / 7

Most of what I'm going to write here contradicts Herbs advise so use it for what it's worth.   Keep in mind, I have only done this a few times.  It takes a lot to get me to make this commitment.

First off, why?  My goal is to have 2-3 dates a month with a hot woman who actually enjoys spending time with me going out and having great sex.  So, long term the plan is to be dating without drama and have a great time.  Connection, conversation and amazing intimacy.  That usually doesn't come in one date.

Second, I can afford to pay 2-3k a month in allowances for a few girls.  So, if one skips out, I have a party pad till I pick up a new one.  The lease is in my name.

Not a chance I'm going after those hos that want 7-10k per month.  Never worth it.  And you never do enough for them.  They are leeches that will suck the life out of you.

The idea of paying rent is not even discussed till after we have been seeing each other a long time.  She has to prove to be consistent and a good time.  We have to have a great connection.  No emotional fizzle.  Months of consistency and great communication.  Good dates are easy and there can always be something ongoing that can stay ppm.  

Why do I consider rent?  I like the idea of having access to the apartment.  Lease is in my name.  If she fucks around I can always boot her out.  But it also guarantees she's gonna be there more when I want to.  If she's willing to rearrange her schedule to see me at least once a week, then she is a candidate.  If I'm shelling out rent, there's gonna be guarantees on her end as well.  That includes text, talk, pics, videos and regular dates.  Great time alone.  Like a real girlfriend with less drama.

Here are the real results so far:

1. Lasted 5 months.  6 month lease I had the place, basically used it for an outcall if I wanted to see an escort.  Then let it go.  Was good, till she flaked and I asked her to move out.
2. Lasted 2 months.  She was 'on vacation' for almost a month.  I swung by and saw her chilling there with friends.  I told them all to get the fuck out.  She argued about it being here place, I pulled the phone out to call the cops.  Lease was in my name.  She left very quickly.
3. Went for close to a year.  This was during Covid and she was a college student so it was rough.  Ended due to something happening to her.  So no blame game on either side.
4. Still going.  Been paying her rent for six months.  We were together two years before hand. Going great.  I've met her family, she's met mine.  We are more of a couple at this point.

Lessons learned.
1. be more careful than you think.  If you think she's about ready and going to commit.  Wait, make her prove she can be trusted.
2. Is this someone I actually want to have any connection or liability to me?
3. Can you afford to pay the lease if you boot her out?  And still enjoy your life?
4. You are signing a lease, what is her commitment?

sweetman 93 Reviews 26 reads
posted
2 / 7

I'm glad this works for you!  Props! But I can't see taking the risk though.  I've had 2-3 dates per month with several very long term SBs who were totally reliable and never asked for more than the modest ppm allowance we initially agreed on.  And one of them traded dates between her apartment and my home, no hotel costs or fuel for the RV required.  If you pay the rent for her, and she trashes the place, you are on the hook, same as if she trashed a hotel room in your name.  And if you need to kick her ass out there's drama, which I avoid at all costs.  As for having a party pad, that's what my RV is for.  So I don't see any incentive whatsoever to pay a girl's rent for her.

am2014 42 Reviews 28 reads
posted
3 / 7

I am glad it works for you man, but have to say this “kick her out if things don’t work” approach is fraught w danger in California with all the laws we have on the books supporting the person living  in the dwelling  

It is very easy for someone w nasty or  legal minded  friends (that she’s kept hidden from you) to create trouble and squat in the apartment against your will

netnoy 55 Reviews 28 reads
posted
4 / 7

Those are problems.  But, criminal trespassing charges will affect the ability to get a job.  Plus I can get her banned on seeking with that fairly easily.  It may take a bit to boot her. Or just stop paying the rent so they do it for me.

Remember, it's an I can afford the risk for the reward.  I'm not saying you shot do it.  I'm saying if you are thinking about it, read this.

herbtcat 6 Reviews 23 reads
posted
5 / 7

First, as others have said, if it works for you, then it works for you! Well done.  

 
I hope no one here takes my (or Papa Sweet's) advice as some sort of "Sugar Law" LOL. My posts are about MY experiences and, critically, my results. The old cliche "YMMV" (Your mileage may vary) holds true when dating any women in any context. (I'd add "...cause bitches be crazy!" but it's really not necessary, is it?) :P  

 
Now as am2014 pointed out, California real estate laws are highly bent towards tenants, especially low-income tenants. There are many news stories (not even going to mentions Covid 'no-evictions' rules) of tenants refusing to leave and the courts refusing to allow the landlord to evict, sometimes for months!  To try to protect themselves from abusive tenants, the real estate associations have published boilerplate lease agreements that have "court tested" text. One of the firm requirements (that I had to deal with when I agreed to pay rent in 2017) is that all persons who "live" there, or who co-sign or guarantee payment, must be on the lease. So, if you take the lease in your name only, then allow her to liver there, you will both have problems:  
1. She can never talk to the leasing office or property manager, as they don't see her on the lease and will not react to any issues or complaints, except to...  
2. Contact you to advice you that you are in violation of the lease and - consequences.  Then...
3. If she refuses to leave (and she can!), and/or trashes the apartment or any of the property in the complex, you have a BIG problem as you will take full liability for all monetary damages and possible judgements. If she is not on the lease, she cannot be sued by the property for civil purposes. But she can face criminal issues for trespassing - IF she loses the month-long court battles.  I'll grant that if you have to pay the property company, you can ultimately sue her to recover. But what are the chances you will ever get paid from that judgement?  

 
Now let's puts all of the above in perspective: By the time you are neck-deep in unravelling these domestic problems, there is really no distinction between going through this with a SB or with a civilian girlfriend. So, your point is well taken: Once she "proves" herself (let's not get into HOW) the risks are no greater than moving in with any women.  

 
But for me, I will never consider directly paying her rent again, unless the relationship has progressed beyond sugar, to civilian dating, and on to getting engaged to be married. And since I will never get married, it's just not going to happen.  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

Newto1000 26 reads
posted
6 / 7

Completely agree.  Letting a SB live in an apartment that you lease is similar to co-signing a loan.  Just not prudent.  Moreover, why not just give the monthly rent payment to the SB.  A whole lot cleaner and painless.  

sweetman 93 Reviews 23 reads
posted
7 / 7

Giving her the monthly rent is certainly much better.  However that assumes she has enough financial strength and good credit to qualify for leasing an apartment in her own name in the first place.  And how often does that happen?  I often see SB profiles that state they want help so they can move out and get their own place.  That's a red flag for me, since they almost certainly won't qualify to lease an apartment on their own.

Register Now!