Well, I FINALLY took the plunge and paid for Seeking. It was nice to read my messages. I had a dozen+ of them for a long time, but do they expire after a while? I have one message from 5 months ago, but the profile is deactivated, so I know deactivation doesn't delete the message. Half the messages simply request to view my private photos.
What I have noticed in the past and after paying is that I don't get as many views and favorites now that I've paid. I used to hop on for free for a few minutes and view profiles and then I would get hit with views, messages and favorites. Now, it's like i've become invisible. I suppose that's normal with this site. Actually, now I think turning off my online status has something to do with it. I'll turn it back on. I think I know the answer to this question, but I'll ask anyway for the benefit of others. I received a message a couple of days before I paid from a woman in Australia. She claimed to be moving to my town for work and will be here for a year. She wanted to know if she'd like the city or hate it or a bit of both. So, I replied saying I don't know her and asked what she likes in a city and when would she be coming to town? Her reply was simply "are you on Whatsapp? Easier to talk there" How could it be easier then the reply she just sent? In the past with regular dating sites I've viewed that sort of reply as a red flag. Is her reply a red flag for a scammer? I'm not interested in giving my number with zero rapport. I'm not really interested in this woman other that then to share about the city I live. I tried searching the forum for an answer, but I was getting broad results. In any event, I have a wealth of information to put to actual use!This is almost certainly a scam. If it's an Asian woman it could likely be the 'pig butchering' scam (google it) designed to lure you into crypto. Tons of other scams, many designed to sell you "content."
Stick with local gals and be aware that if someone sent you a message a month ago she's probably moved on at this point. Seeking is a kind of dating and very different from the pro world. Read though this forums archives for more tips.
Is that what they call it? Sure is prevalent !
When your status changes; unpaid to paid, recurring sub rebills, profile off then turned back on, you will get attention.
Two possible causes:
1. The default search filters are "newest" or "recently active." If your profile suddenly becomes active or paid & active, your profile will likely bubble up to the top of most searches of SD's in a given area. Many POTs (and scammers) look for these and will view, favorite or message you thinking you are "fresh meat."
2. SA is suspected of artificially propping up "new and recently rebilled profiles to drive attention to you, thereby (not so subtly) reinforcing their presumed value to you. ("Gee, I better reup next month so I don't miss out on any of these honeys!")
So don't be too fast to assume you are suddenly the best (and only) BSD (Big Swinging Dick) in the area.
Next: out of town profiles/SB's. The short version is she's useless to you if she's not local (you decide what local is). So a good reply to weed out the scammers and keep you focus on local, lower-hanging fruit could be:
"Sounds like you are stating an amazing journey! Please contact me when you get to (my area). I'd love to connect then and see where this can go."
If she still wants to message, be a bit more direct: "Thanks for the suggestion to connect. I am focusing on opportunities that are local to me right now. I hope we can reconnect after you land..."
Life is good
The Cat
On Secret Benefits, you have to pay for each SB you contact. Therefore on that site, one strategy is to only respond to those who contact you first.
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On Seeking you pay for a time period, and therefore you're strategy should be to blast to everyone you are even a little interested in. Don't wait for them to contact you first.
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It's a numbers game.
Thank you all for the information. I know it's a numbers game. Someone recently posted that they sent out 50 messages as soon as they paid for membership. I cannot deal with sending out that many. I've only sent out a few and they were all replies to message i received. With just 3 chats going I got confused on who I was replying to at one point.
I recall someone here said they only reply to SBs who reach out to them first, if interested. Maybe I'm mistaken. i will ramp up my sending of messages and initiate contact with some of my favorites.
I recall someone here said they only reply to SBs who reach out to them first, if interested. Maybe I'm mistaken. i will ramp up my sending of messages and initiate contact with some of my favorites.
My rationale is that I am relatively old (early 60's) and rather fat. Most SBs will tell you it's never about looks. Most SB's are lying. But not all. If I get a message and can see she has viewed my profile, I know she's aware of my total looks (I have several clothed full body shots) and she probably is more interested in my wealth and personality than she is turned off by my age and looks. If she messages and has not viewed my profile, that the 1st yellow flag she's a potential scammer or GPS ROB.
Now I know I get fewer messages than most SD's. But I suspect I get a much higher conversion rate (# messages received / # BCD sessions). But that's what I do. The blast the ocean and see who gets caught in the net is a valid strategy as well. Be willing to experiment - play the long game - and you will learn how YOU can win.
As to how to keep track of multiple POT conversations, use your business and sales skills:
Create a Sales Prospect List (in excel or word, or...) and record relevant details each time you get a 1st message (or reply) from a POT. Update that record as the conversation progresses. Keep moving through the sales cycle to get to the close. (Understand needs, create demand, overcome objectives, present the contract terms and get her to sign on the bottom line!)
I also add a new contact record in my iPhone for each POT that goes off site. I track her "name" SA profile name, age, and if we discuss allowance the amount, as well as any other relevant info like where she lives, if she's ok with BB, if she works/goes to school, lives alone or with roommates/family, etc. After a break in messaging (like overnight) I review my notes and the last several text messages before I send or reply. I try to reference something we previously discussed and I use her name as well (not every message, just enough to appear like you have a personal connection).
"Hey Mary, great to hear from you! Hope your history class wasn't too boring last week. 
I've been thinking about you and would really like to plan a brief meeting so we can work on possible details. How does that sound to you?"
- Yes it's long, but it connects in a conversational tone. Don't be that one-word-reply neanderthal she usually talks to in bars. ("Hey sweet tits! Yu dtf 2nite")
Take your time, work the leads and pay attention to details. You will be closing BCD's more often than you think.
Life is good
The Cat
The Cat has it down to a science! Love it!
My experience, in contrast to herb's, is that I need to reach out to the ones who interest me, and sometimes follow up with 2-3 messages (after that I give up). The rationale is that the hotties are have their inboxes overflowing (!) and if you don't catch them at the right time (they might have other POTs or be busy elsewhere) you are down in a pile of 50-200 messages, unless there's something about you that really stands out (such as looks or extraordinary visible wealth).
I do get a fair number of likes and messages in addition to the scammers and foreign ones, but these are generally 5-7s and I'm aiming a bit higher. Hard to estimate where I stand on the SD spectrum but my best guess is I'm a bit above average in looks and slightly below average in wealth.
Of course the reasons you connect can vary widely. Some gals want an allowance and no emotional connection. Some want a no-strings boyfriend with or without exclusivity. Some want you to pay their rent and tuition. There are still a lot of fish out there, so don't take it personally if your favorite doesn't reciprocate.
Just curious carlhungus how well the monthly subscription to Seeking has worked for you so far? I am new to the SD/SB dynamic and have been doing some research here. From what I am gathering, it is worth the monthly fee? Any decent leads or closings/BCD's?