Borrowed $5000 for a vacation. Promised to pay it back. Then had to borrow more on the vacation. 2 years no payback. Now I'm making her pay it back. But I also know where she works, lives, etc. I can be a real dick if I need to about it. She went psycho at the end so I'm not going to be nice.
This is more like a rant for me as a channel of catharsis. I know I did something in the beginning. Yet, I did it.
I won't name any names. So, don't ask for a name.
I turned a SP to a SB for 5 years, took her off the market. The financials didn't work out. So, I let het back to the wild, so to speak. She still wanted to see me (at a reduced capacity). She was in a financial jam and wanted a loan and wanted to "work it off". I was reluctant even though I saw her for almost 10 years. Anyways, I proceeded with the loan. The loan is 20% paid off but she doesn't answer texts anymore.
More specifically, sometimes, when I see her, I pause on the repayment, letting her have some cash to go home with. A few times, she wanted extra cash 'cause she always need more money LOL
Cautionary tale: No matter how long you know your SPs or SBs or even your girlfriend or wife, they can double cross you at any point. Yeah, I am dumb as well!
We've all done things we know are stupid. Just comes with the territory. Don't beat yourself up about it too much. Try not to repeat! Some lessons are more expensive than others, so learn from them!
We've all done things we know are stupid. Just comes with the territory. Don't beat yourself up about it too much. Try not to repeat! Some lessons are more expensive than others, so learn from them!
Borrowed $5000 for a vacation. Promised to pay it back. Then had to borrow more on the vacation. 2 years no payback. Now I'm making her pay it back. But I also know where she works, lives, etc. I can be a real dick if I need to about it. She went psycho at the end so I'm not going to be nice.
Borrowed $5000 for a vacation. Promised to pay it back. Then had to borrow more on the vacation. 2 years no payback. Now I'm making her pay it back. But I also know where she works, lives, etc. I can be a real dick if I need to about it. She went psycho at the end so I'm not going to be nice.
I feel you, Bro. Been there and then been there again.... sigh.
After doing this for better than a decade, I have observed the following about SB's and allowance:
Once the cash is in her hands, she forgets about it. It no longer exists and she's already looking to you for the next gift. If you watch carefully you can actually see her put the bills in her purse with one hand quicker than a bouncer takes a tip at a Vegas strip club! Meanwhile the other hand is searching for more money.
You might as well have dropped all that cheddar in the garbage disposal in your kitchen sink. It can all be summarized by the phrase "what have you done for me lately?" where "lately" = the last 5 seconds.
It's not really conscious on her part. And it's not really an attempted scam. She just doesn't remember what happened. It's like when Ted Lasso told his star player to have a memory of a goldfish. That's your SB's memory - like a goldfish - 5 seconds.
About 5 years ago, I was dating one of my 1st porn stars. This is the 21-year-old blond who turned out to be bat-shit crazy. We had agreed on $500 per date with all access, BB and multiples. Totally unlimited and enthusiastic freak in bed. But - crazy. After tolerating much of her antics for far too long, here's what she did to make me bail out and pull the ripcord. She had me take her to a phone store to get a new phone. Her last one was lost/broken/stolen/shoved up someone's ass - the story kept changing. She asked me to pay for the new one, about $550 including paying off her past due bill. I told her I could use her allowance money to pay for the phone plus I'd cover the extra $50 as well. But she would get no cash for our date. She had the nerve to tell me that wasn't fair. And that she just couldn't have sex for "no money." I told her get into my car and that we'd discuss how to solve the problem while I drove to a "better store." I pulled up at her home and told her I was done. I had treated her with kindness, put up with her tantrums at 2 am and that it was time to go our separate ways. She was actually STUNNED! I had her exit my car and I drove off.
About 30 days later, she was run out of town and the porn industry for stealing from another girl on a porn set.
Life is good
The Cat
You are right Herb, in my short time in the bowl [Fishbowl?] I've also had hard lessons in the short memory of goldfish. Do not 'lend' her money. A cash 'gift' will disappear without a trace of gratitude much beyond the time it takes to tuck it in her purse. Your kindness and compassion if you help her pay her overdue rent or car will likely also go unrewarded as she will then resent your attempt to expect her to give you sexual favors for your advance payment. It's a skewed system of gambling and the odds are against you from the start. Keep it cash for services rendered. I'd rather it be more like a relationship and give her help when she needs it but all too often she will take advantage of my generosity and not return it in kind. Since most SB's treat it like sex work you have little choice but to keep it sugar-for-sugar or you become an ATM simp that will soon be drained and left for dead.
I feel you, Bro. Been there and then been there again.... sigh.
After doing this for better than a decade, I have observed the following about SB's and allowance:
Once the cash is in her hands, she forgets about it. It no longer exists and she's already looking to you for the next gift. If you watch carefully you can actually see her put the bills in her purse with one hand quicker than a bouncer takes a tip at a Vegas strip club! Meanwhile the other hand is searching for more money.
It was like a dream BECAUSE she was crazy! LOL
But like all dreams, I woke up and had to face reality.
Life is good
The Cat
It was like a dream BECAUSE she was crazy! LOL
When they ask you for a loan and say they will pay you back, just think if you are OK with not getting the money back because they will never pay you back. I have had SBs asking me for a couple hundred dollars and I gave them the money knowing I would never get it back. I always say no if they ask me for more than that. A firm NO on car payment or rent.
I am sure that many SB's actually want to believe they will pay you back... at first.
But then reality sets in as the same reasons they started sugar dating, namely an inability to manage their money, are still around. So the motivation to escape the loan builds until they end up realizing that unlike a real bank loan, there are few risks to defaulting beyond the closing of their "Bank of SD account."
Meanwhile they realize it's fairly easy to find a new "Bank of SD branch" and they can't do any kind of SB Credit check.
In other words, she can find a replacement dick/wallet faster than you can find a replacement SB.
So if you truly feel inclined to fund her asks, especially if it's serious money, either make it a gift or just politely decline. I have tried some creative solves to this in the past: She needed $8,000 to get a used car. I told her if she can save $6,500 by a target date and show up for energetic BCD at half allowance with no missed dates, I would give her the remaining $1,500 and go with her to negotiate the purchase at the dealer.
She's still driving her old, beat-up clunker.
Life is good
The Cat
I am sure that many SB's actually want to believe they will pay you back... at first.
The Cat
Herb makes a good point.
These gals may 'borrow' the money with good intentions, but as the old saying goes the path to hell is paved with good intentions. Having made several 'loans' from my own branch of SD [that were of course defaulted on] I've learned there is no upside to 'loaning' an SB money. She will never pay it back. [Unless it's to seed you for a much larger loan soon thereafter which she'll for sure default on]
There is almost no upside to gifting her money beyond the agreed on PPM unless she has demonstrated equal to greater value UPFRONT that proves she's earned it.
As Herb has demonstrated with his real-world example of giving his SB the opportunity to show initiative in his own car loan scenario, few SB's have the desire or motivation to accept any kind of help if it involves them having to make an effort or save any money on their own even if it would result in your providing matching funds for them.
It's much easier for her to drop you and find a new hard dick with an open wallet with whom she can rinse and repeat.
This happens to escorts too. Their civvie friends who know about the other job think these girls are loaded. The friends make a sad story, ask for a loan and cash and dash happens.
-- Modified on 7/31/2025 2:06:49 PM