After years of seeing pros and now that the price range is beyond what i deem as doable, i have finally given in and teady to dip my toes in the sugar bowl.. i have read many of your posts over the last few nonths.. but need some major help!!

1st i brought a vanilla visa card and after i filled out my SA profile went to pay and of course it tells me not valid? I read on many posts that a vanilla vsrd works.. what am i doing wrong?

 
2nd - looking at the profiles is overwhelming.. so clear gold diggers, some nice college students, lotz of older, in attractive and lots out of the country..  how can i filter for some decent and fair yet beautiful ladies?

3rd - how and when do you echsnge phoje nos?

Excuse the typos off of my phone

First, welcome to the bowl.
You’ll get a lot of pointers here but most important is that this is a different world from the pro scene.
The idea of replacing pros with SBs just to save money is not the right mentality.
Most of the gals are not pros and shouldn’t be treated that way. Many want a relationship that’s not quite regular dating and not P2P. Most significantly they can just say no if they don’t like you so you have to show some consideration in addition to green.
Of course there is a broad spectrum on SA from gals looking for a boyfriend or traveling companion to pure ‘no strings’ girls who are closer to escorts, but still want to choose their partner. Lots of scams and rinsers and those wanting to sell “content” or play online.
As for your Visa card it may or may not work, you may need to try a few different ones.

Welcome!  As "Mouche said, there's a lot of different motivations for women in the bowl.  Some truly just want to get laid and get paid.  I've enjoyed those, because, pussy, right?  But a surprising number are more interested in creating a true relationship.  I'm going on 2 years now with both of my regulars who are both just 26.  I'm sure they both love the stable income from visiting me every other week.  But I'm also sure they love my companionship and look forward to it as eagerly as I do.  I love 'em both!  But yeah, I still troll for new ones  cuz I love the chase and I love the variety.

Thanks for the reply. I wss able to officially join last night using tje google play protect with the vanilla visa card.  

I appreciate the advice. So my next question is since this is different from pros (which is great) and different from dating what is the process?  

Do i chat, introduce my self and then ask for her number or ask her to meet somewhere for lunch or dinner and hope they show?

I have seen some post here where people have kicked off SA, not sure why?

You can't discuss anything related to paying for 'favors' or you will be banned. Some gals will try this and you can either ignore them, block them or tell them you can only discuss details off the platform. It's a good idea to get a Google Voice number or use a different platform because scammers can do malicious things with your real number.
As for the rest.. it's a bit like dating. You chat, discuss your interests, ask about them (you want to know if this is a student, a woman with a real job or someone who makes a living on this). If you feel like things are going well you should arrange a  video call and/or PLATONIC meet for coffee or lunch. Anyone who asks for money in advance or just to meet is a scammer.  
At some point they will ask or propose an allowance, or you should. Think about your ballpark and what kind of frequency you want, and remember you will normally take these gals out to dinner, shows, etc., and maybe buy small gifts. The two of you define this. Some want exclusivity, some don't. Probably best to use protection even if they offer BB, at least until trust is established and tests done.

Lot of useful info there  

But know this is “dating” first and foremost. You need to have some basic social skills and “game”  

The current reality is -  yeah, you can probably land someone average  or meh with not much effort - but The good looking ones are also aware of how scarce they are and are not going to settle for just any allowance / ppm or someone they don’t like

Sorry I didn't reply earlier. Fortunately, you got some great info from the gang.  

 
I'm no expert on paying for SA anonymously, as I'm not married, have no SO, and my closest friends know (or strongly suspect) that I live in the Sugar Bowl.    

 
Your questions about how to manage the discussions are on point. That's really the heart of the success/failure dynamic.  In general, as mentioned, keep your messages on the site far away from any hint of quid pro quo language. Even if/when a POT asks for an amount or mentions explicit sexual acts don't reply in kind - that's an instant ban from the site.  

 
Instead, spend a minimum amount of time talking on the site and quicky, graciously move the chat off-site to text, what's app, google voice, snapchat, even email.  

 
Try something like this:  
"I'd really like to set up a brief meeting soon to see how well we get along and discuss the details of an ideal arrangement for both of us. Here's my text number 999-999-9999. You can message me anytime that's convenient for you."  

 
Now you still need to be careful with messaging even when you move off-site at first.  Go through at least 2-4 message cycles before you get too detailed. Or let her take the lead and ask more specific q's. Note you don't have to give her a $$ number yet, even if asked.  But you can get into a deeper discussion about date frequency, activities, likes/dislikes, and expectations. I recommend you stay away from offering or agreeing to any amount until you are face-to-face. You will have a much better chance of negotiating an allowance you are both comfortable with once you have established some personal rapport together.  Of course if she insists, proceed with caution and be willing to walk away if she's asking for too much.  

 
Remember this is dating site. Yes, there is a certain monetary structure to these dates, but still, wait until you are comfortable that you are both on the same playing field. If you feel like saying something that you would not say to a woman you just met in a supermarket, friend's party or at a concert, then say something else.  She knows why you're both talking, so work the other aspects of your potential relationship 1st.  

 
With the last POT I converted to BCD about 2 weeks ago, I only mentioned an allowance as she got out of my car when I dropped her off after our M&G.  "I'm really looking forward to seeing you next Saturday. And I'm happy to help you out with your bills as well. Will $300 work for you?"  

 
It did, and six days later I dropped a load of... $20 bills on her... right after I dropped a different load in her sweet mouth.  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

Thank you for the advice herb and others.. i have to keep reminding my self its not like dealing with pros. But so far mostly scammers. No M&G luck as yet.

This sounds like the perfect arrangement for me! I want to learn more about this fascinating approach to 'dating with benefits' as it would be an ideal alternative to P4P. I don't like dealing with the PROS as it is not real GFE to me. I hate knowing a PRO is banging 100 other guys that week and I am blowing them by proxy everytime I DATY! Plus P4P is so formal and feels fake. I have such a hard time performing with pros and once the cover goes on Oscar goes to sleep... he's not interested anymore, LOL! It would be so nice to have a dedicated GFE that is low or no mileage - a virgin I can teach, preferably! I'm probably dreaming but I see success stories so I think anything is possible.