Hmmm, gmancala326,
Is it so bad to be a male, cursed with testosterone and androgens so ill-matched by females? Is it so bad to be a male, saddled with all these hormones, and yet evolving mentally in a society where the expression of sexuality is regulated, controlled and debated more than the death penalty and the possession of firearms?
You know, I could go on and on and on. I'm not sure why you have had sex with only one woman and then married her (wow, what voodoo was that?!), but rest assured, YOU ARE NORMAL. There is nothing wrong with you. Any guilt trip you may put on yourself has nothing to do with your physical being, rest assured. As a male, your genotype dictates the phenotypic expression of sexual interest toward a variety of females, for optimal seed-spreading and the best offspring possible. So, it's not BAD to want to sleep with other women. As to "hobby," well, what if you could sleep with a variety of females for free? Wouldn't you?
Just think of all the guys who can get whoever, whatever, whenever. In my day, it was Warren Beatty. Today, it's George Clooney. Yup, they went/go at it with no shame. So what makes you different from them, really? A couple of mil's in the bank and a bankable face?
You must understand that the healthy thing for males is to want sex, to want it often, and to want it with as many people as possible. If you don't believe me, look into a world where both participants are equally horny, i.e. homosexual males. There's a lotta love goin' on there, and for good reason. The parties' sex drive is equally matched, they're generally not on some kind of a guilt trip about it, they don't guard their genitals like they are at Fort Knox, and they FEEL GOOD ABOUT HAVING SEX WITH MULTIPLE PARTNERS. And you should too. So there.
Now, does that mean that you should "cheat" on your wife? I can't tell you what you should do. Your conscience is between yourself and yourself. But what I can tell you, is that it's a helluvalot more "healthy" to want to screw many women than just one. I guess that's why swinging is on the upswing and polyamory is the new fad among 20-somethings. These guys screw around with their wimmin's blessings and apparently it's working just fine. The women quickly learn that sex is fun, not the end of the world and hey, maybe the guys can relax and know that their wives get it on with others too, while the Earth still stands. And maybe that's what it takes for some people to realize that we don't OWN each other sexually (or any other ways for that matter), despite wearing wedding rings or promising something in front of officiants.
For everyone, please read Laura Kipnis' book "Against Love." And then make informed choices.
Welcome to the club, old bean,
the Love Goddess
