Gents, my profile on SA clearly indicates my desire for a casual fwb intimate arrangement.  I’m also funny and give a tag line to be engaged by POTs.  My issue of late is I am running into a number of POTs who want to go to dinner multiple times and get paid as if we where BCDs.  I’ll do a m&g but not multiples and paying 3 bills for the experience.  Besides what part of discreet happens when out to dinner.  Is this a new trend?  

I think it is just human nature.  Most of these girls have the Pretty Woman fantasy where they will be showered with gifts by a rich handsome businessman.  They'll ask for the stars.
.
Another factor, my theory, is that as the idea gains wider acceptance, girls embellish their successes.  So their grapevine is full of fantastic success stories that they all want to get in on.  Hence the unreal expectations bloom.

It's not a new trend, there have always been some SBs who think they are entitled to "compensation" for their time at a m&g type of date. They often claim "I usually get $xxx", and the more stuck up ones claim that they get so many requests for coffee dates they'd be spending all their time dating for free.  I happen to think it's all bullshit.  But I never say that.  I usually explain that in my experience sugar dating should be a mutually interesting and interested activity.  We should both be equally motivated to invest an hour of our time to meet each other.  If not, the likelihood of genuine chemistry resulting in an arrangement is pretty much zero.  Once we start a real arrangement (meaning some BCD time) then it's a different story and the $ugar begins to flow.  But not before.  Otoh I would not make her incur expenses to meet me.  If she has genuine expenses like uber or babysitter I'll cover them in addition to paying for the M&G.  But no payment for her time! And it amazes me that so often the ones who ask for payment to meet for coffee are also the ones who insist they are not escorts.  When in fact they are behaving exactly the way escorts do!

We don't pay allowance for a M&G, let alone allowance for multiple dinners before moving on to BCD dates. This needs to be a well-understood, but never documented, rule for all POT SB's.  Typically, when a POT mentions she wants to be paid for meeting, I  counter with something like this:  

 
First, if she couches it in "I've been burned by time wasters" language, I tell her "I understand, I've been burned as well and it makes it difficult to trust someone you want to meet for the first time..."

 
Then I tell her that "I'm asking for a brief meeting so we can make sure we are comfortable with each other before committing to more time and activities together - really more like a job interview than a date". I always use the term "job interview," because no one expects to be paid for a job interview. It frames it as a small, mutual investment of time to ensure a good ongoing result. Next, if she has to drive a long distance, or use an Uber, or I pick a place that requires paid parking, I offer to cover small expenses (Max $50-60, but usually more like $20-30) like gas or parking fees. And of course, I'll off to pay for drinks+.  

 
If she still balks, I push back a bit more with "Honestly, I'm looking for a fun, ongoing long term arrangement that lets both of us get what we want. If you are looking for one or just a few dates, maybe I'm not the right guy for you..."  If she still resists, then it's not difficult to tell her "Well I understand your concerns. Good luck in your search."  

 
Then STFU! Do not send anymore messages. Leave it to her to reply.  She will either:
- come back and agree
- stop messaging and presumably move on
- block you.  

If it's the 2nd or 3rd, you got out with a minimum of time spent. If it's the 1st, she now understands that Daddy is not a chump, and he makes the rules about money.  

 
And, of course, there are exceptions, or at least grey areas. I met a sweet 22 year old AA spinner in 2017 that lived 40 miles north of me in Lancaster (way north of LA; cheap rent, cheap jobs, cheap food).  She wanted to build a deep level of comfort, trust, and she later told me affection before she would agree to BCD.  I tolerated 4 dinner dates, paid for by me, but with no allowance at all. At the end of the 4th date - about 6 weeks total since we met - I told her I was looking for a decision before I'd schedule another date.  She agreed to an overnight for our next meeting for the allowance we had already negotiated on our M&G.  It was worth the wait for 3 reasons:  
1. The allowance we had pre-negotiated was for about 3-4 hours, but she offered an overnight with unlimited access.  
2. She was an amazing fuck. Just a perfect, slim (and I mean I could see rib cage, and no belly fat when she was on all fours - Yumm!), and enthusiastic as a, 18 year old cheerleader taking the quarterback away from some other cheerleader on the squad.  
3. I was getting plenty of BCD's from two other SB's during the 6 week dating trail period.  

 
So trust your Spidey Senses. If she's just looking for diner date payments, use the above to get her on the path, or move on.   (Or tell her to go to WYP, where guys will offer to pay her for a 1st date.)  

 
Life is good

 
The Cat

Sadly, not a new trend at all. I will never pay for an initial M&G. I generally just tell them that I’m looking for a very casual initial M&G so we can get to know one another a bit. I’m big on chemistry and there’s no way to know that without spending a little time together. Don’t really have a problem if they need an Uber for the first date and have done this multiple times. Just have to be willing to tell them that I may not be the right match for them. I view it as just another part of the recruiting and vetting process.