Write Review
1,901,546 Total Reviews 3,188 New Reviews
6,936 Users Online

The Erotic Highway

Sexual Addiction
Gfehunting 5870 reads
posted

I have a sexual addiction I believe. I think constantly about sex. Do support groups actually work or not? I think my sexual addiction has gotten worse because of the fact I quit smoking a few months ago, and since then, my sexual appetite has increased.

Is this normal?

TheLoveGoddess3006 reads

Dear Gfehunting,

Please let's not confuse thoughts of sex and sexual appetite with sex addiction. If you have quit smoking it is only natural that your sexual appetite has increased, as there is more bloodflow to the brain and more bloodflow to the penis - a wonderful, nice phenomenon :-).

Now the "addiction" part. Are you finding yourself constantly searching for women on line? Are your finances in trouble because of spending money on providers? Are you neglecting your partner at home because you are on line for hours either porn surfing or communicating with providers? Is searching and interacting with providers taking over your private life? If you are neglecting other aspects of your life such as your partner, kids and work, then you probably have some issues of compulsivity. But just having increased thoughts of sex and a high sex drive does not sex addiction make.

I work worldwide with men who have been branded by others as "addicts." We enter into a twice-a-week coaching program via Skype or ooVoo for a minimum of three months time. Oftentimes we find that there are other issues, even psychiatric ones requiring medication, that have nothing to do with "addiction" at all. Depression, impulse control disorders, etc. that mask as "sex addiction." It's a very complex issue that cannot be answered simply as "you are an addict, stop having sex for X amount of time." That's why "support groups" often fail - they deny the physical necessity of sex while shaming the individual.

I believe that if you are having problems in your daily life where sex takes up much of your time, then there are underlying issues that need to be addressed in therapy or coaching. But just having increased sexual thoughts and wanting to engage sexually is normal, particularly if you're young, healthy and have an otherwise happy life.

Complex issue,
The Love Goddess

ReplyQuoteReport
Boricualover3223 reads

about "searching for and interacting with providers" probably applies to so many of us. I have an appointment almost once a week, so after each one, within a day or two I'm on the hunt, planning the next one. I consider it a helluva lot of fun, but I do worry that it takes on an inordinate amount of my thinking time. I have a hard time using the word addict when it comes to sex, but I do worry that at least I have entered into a compulsive ritual.

ReplyQuoteReport
The_Happy_Hooker3159 reads

Such as they are a sex addict, how far would  go to see that they get help, if it is in act the case--they ARE a sex addict?  What do you feel your own moral obligations are towards it--stalking, risky type sex (destroying one's marriage, underage sex).  Would you stage an intervention if they asked?  If they violated a community standard of hurting themselves and others.  This is not necessarily directed at one person in particular.

ReplyQuoteReport
Cptnkirk3814 reads

I am currently working with her through Skype 2x week and I am having great results.

I have been told the hardest thing was finding a good therapist.  How much better can you do then a licensed sexologist  / PhD and Clinical psychologist?  She is good.

I have not seen a provider or had an affair for about 40 days.  That is a very long time for me.  She is about as liberal of a coach as you will find.  Some of us just need a break or have taken things too far.  Some of us are in the hobby for the wrong reason.  If you are not looking for a NSA relationship you are probably in it for the wrong reason.

Good luck working on your self improvement.  I am pleased with mine.

ReplyQuoteReport
Gfehunting4714 reads

Yes I am constantly searching for women online and trying to do my research for the next encounter. Are my finances in trouble? Not yet, but if i continue down this path, i will probably be homeless soon.

I dont have a partner, kids, gf, nothing..i just like having sex with as many random partners that I can.  I feel it is my obligation (is that weird?).

ReplyQuoteReport
TheLoveGoddess3562 reads

Otherwise, people have all sorts of different moral, cultural, emotional standards. There IS NO right or wrong in this case - only what YOU feel odd or difficult. If it becomes a compulsion in the sense that you don't enjoy it but feel compelled to seek out partners, then seek help.

Thank you,
The Love Goddess

ReplyQuoteReport
selene981044458 reads

"thats why support groups often fail, they deny the physical necessity of sex while shaming the individual."

I suppose it doesn't work for priests either.



ReplyQuoteReport
dandraper4404 reads

LoveGoddess,

I think I'm one of those people who might have some sort of compulsive behavior problem can you PM me and tell me a little more about your services

ReplyQuoteReport
TheLoveGoddess3417 reads

ReplyQuoteReport
G24192 reads

If women really knew how often men thought about sex, and what they were thinking, they'd probably never leave the house!  

You may or may not meet the qualifications of sexual addictions that LG has described, but based on what you said in your post, you're what I'd call a normal American male.  LOL.

ReplyQuoteReport
Addicted2Lust3606 reads

ReplyQuoteReport
Post Reply Back To Forum
Register Now!