Have been reading this board and learned a lot over the last ten months. Huge props to the usual suspects, and very eager to read contributions from those who have not yet posted!
My experience has so varied, and time consuming, that I often considered heeding the general wisdom purveyed here that my sort should stick to mongering. But the chase has been alluring, and I'm doubling down. That has been even easier to do since recent successes in the sugar bowl have taken me over the top. But help with the following, please: 1. Shagging a beautiful college woman who purports to be from Philadelphia suburbs and currently living in the city. But the cell number is unregistered and the area code is for northeast corner of New Jersey, with no connection (such as school) to that area that I know of. Is this a red flag? I wonder whether she could be a pro or quasi-pro who has lied a little in setting up a fictitious identity. Should I ask her how this area code, or just let it go? I have a plan, but the thoughts of others always are welcome. 2. Any guidelines you follow on whether to bring up other SBs while talking with another one? Experiences where it helped or hurt you? 3. How many of you have worked toward an arrangement that goes unprotected FS? If you were happy with the deal, what conditions made it work for you? Who stands by the NEVER in a million years rule and why?*** I know that old threads address some of this, but fresh comments at the top will help newbies and keep the readership up (;
****** Will take thoughts in a pm if you want privacy
1. Let it go, who cares, as long as you follow the "rules", ie: Make expectations clear, no money before BCD, etc. Worst case, she was a pro and will eventually show her cards, I assume you're doing a M&G? My only issue with a "fake" persona, if that's what she is doing, would be that I like to get to know my SBs, so I would know pretty quick if she were a quasi pro and not interested in more than just occasional hit and runs.
2. I only bring up other SBs in one respect. I say that I have had SBs before long term that worked out well and hope to find something similar to that arrangement. That way they know I'm not pulling shit out of my ass as far as my expectations and offer for arrangement amount, etc. If they ask, sure, I'll tell them all about my previous experiences, and that's happened before since I have met quite a few that were completely new to SB arrangements.
3. I'm currently in an unprotected arrangement and it was my plan all along at this point. If I were with multiple SBs, I might think otherwise and stay protected, but being exclusive to one SB at the moment, dropping the hoodie was a huge benefit imo. But for me, the condition was that I got to know her enough that I feel I could trust her to keep her end of the deal and be exclusive with me.
1) I think you are overthinking it.
2) Not by name, but I do share some experiences. Like the worst and the best. It lets them know you are experienced in the Bowl and not a newbie that they may try to scam. Sometimes they share experiences, but more times than not it's about how the last guy was high end and took her everywhere, yada yada yada.
3) SMH
1. These days, area codes don't mean a thing. With google voice or something similar, your number could be from anywhere - I've deliberately arranged numbers in areas where I travel for business frequently that seem to be plausibly local.
2. I've used previous SBs as references. In general my pattern has been, when I find one that's really a good fit, is to keep things going for 18 months or so, and plan the ending of the arrangement in such a way as to avoid drama. It's generally a good investment in your karma, and it shows potential companions that you are capable of being pretty serious if that's your thing.
3. That's a place you get to in the same way you get to with anyone else - lots of trust, testing, etc. I'm not sure it's really worth it, but if that's where you want to go, think about it when you're awake, sober, and not horny. You'll thank yourself later.
1. If she's hot and willing to have a sexual relationship, she could claim to be from Mars for all I care.
2. I often talk about Sugar Dating quite openly with my SBs. They seem to find it =fascinating and I love hearing about their adventures too! It has helped me raise my game too. For example, several SBs have told me that the reason they dropped some SDs was because they became too clingy and controlling. They hate having their freedom compromised. So I'm careful never to make them feel like I'm controlling or interfering with their lives.
3. I had one such BBFS arrangement. It was only after serious trust had been established and test results exchanged. And we vowed not to have BBFS with anyone else without informing each other, in which case I would have gone back to condoms with her. I have made promises to my wife (yes, we're ethically poly sluts) and her BF not to engage in uncovered FS without their knowledge and consent and I honor that promise. If I break that rule I will inform them, and begin using condoms with my wife to keep her and her BF safe until I can get tested again. That way I am only putting myself at risk.
On a related subject, I have had bareback stripper slide with a SB recently. How much risk is there from that sort of skin to skin contact?