I frequent a local gentleman's club, and also am a hobbyist. There's a stripper at the club that I *really* want to fuck. So, what are my chances? Is it common or uncommon for strippers to also be available for sex? If so, how do I approach them?
...But my response would be not to approach dancers at all about escorting.
To be sure there are strippers who also escort. If they know you and trust you they will approach YOU if they are available. As a general rule strippers who don't escort have a fairly low opinion of other ladies selling sex in the club during their shifts. A smart girl will keep a low profile and count on discretion from the guys that she decides to trust.
Dear fawellman,
Since the stripper is not here to speak for herself, your guess is as good as ours. The best thing is simply to ask her. What you shouldn't do is to get vulgar, because that turns anyone off, provider or not. Do NOT walk up to her and say "I *really* want to fuck!" Very bad manners, not to mention that LE, in their supreme ignorance, often approach providers by using such words.
If you ask her discreetly and politely if she ever meets with clients "on an intimate basis for a specified time," you may get a different answer. Also, tell her that you can provide "full and verifiable screening information," should she desire it. Remember that ALL women like gentlemen and that loutish words get men nowhere.
As to what that answer is, who knows? Is it common or uncommon? There are no official stats and hence it wouldn't be accurate to just pull a number out of my hat. But of course there are exotic dancers who provide full service. Lots of them. Just be aware that many of them 'cultivate' their client relationships to the nth degree, meaning that these clients may have to pay for many private dances over and over until they get to Paradise, so to speak.
Strippers sometimes tell me that club patrons are "disgusting." Rarely do I hear this from escorts; maybe there is a socioeconomic class difference between the guy who can afford 2 beverages and a lap dance and the suave gent who pays for an evening spent in the dining room of a 5-star hotel with some erotic dessert time to follow.
I think you get my drift,
the Love Goddess
This link will help
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-6521726708683961402&ei=LoliSKCPL6iSrAL8yuXOCw&hl=en
It's common for a stripper to be a young woman who is used to having men hand over large sums of cash in return for little or nothing.
It's common for strippers to have a slightly skewed sense of financial value and worth.
It's common for strippers to be acutely aware of physical attractiveness - their own, and their potential bed partners.
It would be uncommon for a stripper to want it to be common knowledge that she works as an escort, or to make it easy to hook up.
It would be uncommon for a stripper to provide a full GFE service at anywhere near the going local rate.
Ask yourself a few questions about this girl you really want to fuck. Do you think she has trouble getting laid? Do you think she needs the money?(how much do you think she makes at the club on a busy night?) Is there something special about you, that she would want to fuck you? If not, how much money do you think it will take to make her think you ARE special?
If it turns out she IS available, ask a few more questions - are there any drug issues? does she have a big boyfriend, or worse - big stalker? is she looking for a saviour? are you looking to be a saviour?
Not trying to be negative, believe it or not, just relaying some of the issues I've heard from a couple of friends who like to date strippers. Good Luck!
Clarence37 is right, although I did get lucky with a stripper I continue to see (and f*%k) from time-to-time. They tend to be high maint and you will spend a lot of $$$ on them at the clubs in order to see them outside. All-in, an escort is easier, cheaper, more anonymous and less stressful.
I had the good fortune while at a local strip club a number of years ago to have a fine young dancer walk up to my table and hand me a napkin with her name & number on it. I'm fairly realistic and I know these ladies generally don't have very high regard for the guys throwing cash at their naked bodies, they're just playing a game to get the money. I was shocked to say the least when I was handed this fine ladies number on that napkin, I never said ANYTHING to her, I just sat smiling and watching her dance.
What I quickly learned was that the young lady was WILD ! She was never home to answer her phone and when she did respond it was as if she didn't remember me. Once she did remember she turned out to be so into getting high that I decided it wasn't worth it.
YMMV
The first time I went to a club - after a few dances, she outright asked me - "hey, you want me for an outcall?" I was a total newbie and didn't have much cash that day, so had to politely decline. I wouldn't ask first - spend some on her dances, be polite and stay happy with your mileage.
I've been frequenting strip clubs in Vegas for 14 or more years. Lots of the girls are available for a price, but yes... its usually over 'market.' The only ones that openly propositioned me were the druggies and, as the saying goes, I wouldn't fuck one of them with YOUR dick. The only real success I've had with a dancer was with one who was totally 'A List' and I got to know her a bit over a month or two. I made it clear how hot she got me but never 'crossed ANY lines' when she was dancing for me. As she got comfortable with me she pushed for a trip to the "VIP ROOM" and, although its contrary to my norm, I went. After some tips to the Doorman to ensure privacy, she gave me some exceptional dances that culminated with her getting my cock out of my pants and giving me just a taste of head. Afterwards she suggested we 'meet for a drink' at a neighborhood bar the next night. I agreed and we quickly cut a deal for a trip to a hotel. It was $500 and this was several years ago, but it was about the best money I've ever thrown away! I saw her 3 times before she moved out of town and it was better each time.
I really don't know if I have a point here except that coming on strong to one of them is probably not going to work unless they are skanks to begin with. Throw enough dollars around and they will get the clue, but just dealing with online girls would be much less expensive. Be nice, be interested, and POLITELY let them know you are interested in more. It might happen.
MVR
I have had one experience with a dancer that turned into more than lap dances. The strange thing about it, when at the club, I was more into her friend than her.
I hung out with her friend (a brunette) at the club a number of times over a 6 month period of time. I even mentioned to her that I would love to see her for a private session if she was interested. She basically said "Maybe".
One night, I went into the club looking for the brunette, but she wasn't there. Her blonde friend came over and immediately said, "It's noisy in here, maybe we could go back to your place." Well, I may be stupid, but I'm not a complete idiot. I agreed and arranged to meet her outside in half an hour.
Eventually, we found ourselves at my house and she put some music on and danced for maybe two songs. Then she said, "Let's go lay down." Here are the results:
1. She ended up costing more than most highly rated providers and was not in their class, performance-wise, but better than most looks-wise.
2. Although we ended up hooking up a couple more times, she was so flakey that it eventually wasn't worth the hassle.
3. The only reason it was close to worth it was that it was the first and only time I managed such a thing, so there was the element of uncertainty and a little thrill in having 'pulled it off.'
4. Then again, she probably does this quite a bit, heard about me from her friend and added me to the check-list. So who pulled what off on whom?
Interesting thing about this, when we discussed the type of interaction we were having, she kept insisting that she wasn't "a whore" (her words). "I'm not like that." Well, after talking about it a bit, and gently hinting that she may be rationalizing just a bit, she still basically denied providing sex for money. She just said she was "really into" me. Um .. yeah, right. Either way, I could only marvel at her ability to deny, whether internally she had convinced herself or not. She actually thought she was different and better than, "hookers." It was actually quite a turn-off for me.
I might try again for this, with someone else, but only because very good providers are scarce in my neck of the woods.
-- Modified on 6/30/2008 6:26:27 AM
In my 10yrs as a stripper I never wanted to cross that line...all of my dancing days were in clubs until the end...it was a progression...first year was air dancing in a bikini bar,second and 3rd yrs were still there and out of bar batchlor pardies w/ heavy lapdancing,touching and kissing...4-10 yrs were kissing,heavy grinding till dudes shot loads and hj's...it was a progressive thing for me to just get into providing.Alot of gals do not know of the cyber highway or are neieve to use it for such purposes.Because dancing was different from state to state and county to county it was a touch and go on what u could and could not do...plus the last club I worked in treated the ladies like dirt and u can only make so much in dancing,be in a filty envirnment and not have the house fees go up...I think guys get way more from providing...most of my gents don't even go,have gotten ripped of or have never been to a club...I was so surprised.
To me, going to a strip club is frustrating and a bit demeaning. The experience, even if there is a back room for "VIPs", smacks of all the charm of a fraternity circle jerk. Visiting a provider is so different with the chance to interact in an intimate (on some level) and satisfying way (if things go well) with an intelligent skilled lady on an equal footing with each of you knowing why you are there and what each can expect.
As someone who has seen several exotic dancers outside their clubs, I agree with most of the previous posts. Certainly there is a difference if you are traveling and are at a club one time and you have to make your pitch quickly. Also if you want a longterm relationship with just one dancer you are crazy, unless she is financiall supporting you. If you are at a club that you go to frequently, I offer the following advice. At least in my area the code word for going out with a dancer is "dinner" as in "Do you want to go to dinner some time?" Just about all of the dancers know the meaning of this. I carry around slips of paper with my cell number and I give them my number and ask them to call me if they do. This way I am not stalking them or bothing them, the next move in theirs. I do not do this for every dancer, only those that I believe are willing. I also tell them that they can leave a message on my cellphone and that I am the only one who will get the message. I would hate to miss an opportunity because of a missed call. Word gets around quickly in a club that I safe and discrete and the other dancers who provide end up asking me to get together. Also never underestimate the value of information from the other dancers. The best leads that I have gotten have been from other dancers telling me that certain ladies see customers or are "sluts." Why they think this is a turnoff to a guy is part of the reason that men are from Mars and women are from Venus I guess.
I have 'hooked up' with several strippers recently, and the key has been to get them relaxed. There is a great deal of worry about LE trying to catch the dancers doing illegal stuff, so you have to make the young lady feel at ease with you. Usually, I take the offer of a lap dance or private dance, and use the time to find out a little bit about the girl. Then, I ask her if she 'dates', using that word. More often than not, I get a 'yes', but that may just be my good luck. This has worked for me in NY, Boston, and Atlanta.